http://www.arabnews.com/?page=13&section=0&article=121447&d=12&m=4&y=2009

            Sunday 12 April 2009 (16 Rabi` al-Thani 1430)
           
     

      Hearts made of stone
      Qenan Al-Ghamdi | Al-Watan, qe...@alwatan.com.sa
     
        
      Judge Khalifa Al-Tamimi of the General Court in the city of Onaizah in 
the central province of Qassim recently allowed two young Saudi women to marry 
- one a Saudi man and the other a foreigner. He took the action after their 
guardians refused to allow them to marry. The lawyer for the two girls, Mansour 
Al-Jitaili, said the two girls were facing spinsterhood because their fathers 
had prevented them from marrying. He attributed the fathers' attitude to "greed 
and avarice." 

      The lawyer urged all preachers and imams of mosques to explain the 
dangers of preventing girls from getting married. He said these people are 
doing a grave injustice to their daughters and are depriving them of their 
dignity.

      I thought about the "greed and avarice" spoken of by the lawyer and 
understood it as taking the girls' salaries. The girls may have been employed, 
whether as teachers or in other jobs I do not know. A father often finds in his 
daughter a source of income that he is loath to relinquish. He looks at his 
daughter as one of his personal assets, which he can use as he wishes.

      Although this attitude defies reason and is totally rejected by our 
religion, it is nonetheless common in some sections of society.

      I read recently about a woman lecturer at King Abdulaziz University who 
went on a hunger strike in protest at her father's refusal to give his consent 
to her marriage. A woman teacher in Asir sought the help of a judge to save her 
from her father who was adamant in his objection to her marriage because he was 
unwilling to part with her salary. In both cases, the reason was pure and 
simple "greed and avarice." 

      I know a number of women teachers and employees who are married but are 
deprived of their monthly salaries because their fathers made it a condition 
for marriage that they - the fathers - should continue to receive the 
daughters' monthly salaries. I believe that fathers and husbands who take the 
salaries of their daughters or wives to be undignified and unjust. They are, 
however, less cruel than those fathers who take the salaries of their daughters 
and also prevent them from getting married.

      The two girls in Onaizah were able to overcome the problem due to the 
help of a judge but not every girl can do this. For this reason, I believe that 
it is not enough to depend on the work of preachers and imams to enlighten 
fathers against this. A man who will not consent to his daughter's marriage 
because he is unwilling to part with her salary surely is made of stone. We 
need to teach these fathers that their daughters are not property or 
investment. 

      I also believe that the Shoura Council should create a mechanism that 
would enable girls to overcome their shyness and take their cases to court. 
Such a system should also protect the girls from the social implications that 
might result from their defiance of fathers who do not behave like normal human 
beings. They stoop lower than animals; animals at least respect the instincts 
of their fellow creatures.
     


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