http://www.arabnews.com/?page=7§ion=0&article=65666&d=20&m=6&y=2005
Monday, 20, June, 2005 (13, Jumada al-Ula, 1426)
Changing Definitions of Masculinity and Femininity
Iman Kurdi, Arab News
They're made of red lace and the shops are selling them
quicker than they can get them on the shelves. The designer puts her hands
through them and pulls the fabric to show the intricate detail of the lace. She
is describing her work with pride, how she designed a very masculine piece of
underwear, the pattern of the lace is one of geometric squares she explains,
for women we would not use such a pattern. Yes, but it's red lace! What kind of
man wears red lace underwear?
I don't have to wait long for my answer. In a French
department store they appeared, men led by their wives. The shop assistant
confirmed it: Male lingerie is usually bought by women, for their husbands.
What kind of woman wants her husband in red lace? Plenty of
them, according to the sales figures. Male lingerie is the latest fashion fad,
at least in France, and it is a phenomenal commercial success. Of course not
all of it is red lace, most of it is a little more classically male, but still,
it is trespassing into our territory and I don't like it.
From lingerie the program moved on to cosmetics. We were
shown men who spend hours every morning getting ready, who have facials and
body treatments, who buy anti-wrinkle creams and have their teeth whitened.
This did not surprise me; I have long suspected that men are just as vain as
women. All it takes is 30 seconds at a traffic light in Riyadh to see it in
action: Every male checks himself in the mirror, adjusts his ghutra, makes sure
he looks just right. Personal grooming is just as important for men as it is
for women, if not more so. None of this is new, but red lace?
Perhaps I shouldn't be so surprised. David Beckham famously
likes to wear his wife's underwear. It's quite a common fetish. But somehow I
feel this is different. It is part of a more general redefinition of what is
male and what is female.
In Spain, it is a little more serious. A law is about to be
passed which will force men to take on an equal share of housework in the
marital home. The law comes as a response to the fact that 40 percent of
Spanish men were found not to do any housework at all, even when both husband
and wife had full-time jobs. The Saudi solution would be to import guest
workers to do the household chores, the Spanish solution is to enshrine in the
marriage contract a definition of equality which spells out the need for both
men and women to take on an equal share of the household responsibilities,
particularly the care of children and the elderly. Somehow I think the Spanish
solution though difficult to enforce in the short term will be more successful
in the long term.
The way we live is changing and this is naturally leading to
changes in the definitions of masculinity and femininity. Psychology theory
teaches us that much of what we think of as innately feminine or masculine is
in fact social in nature, more to do with how we construe the world than
anything in our biology. As our social environment changes, so the way we
construe certain traits as feminine or masculine will also change. That is not
only natural but healthy.
So perhaps it's not all that surprising that the boundaries
between male and female clothing are beginning to blur a little bit, but red
lace? They asked Yannick Noah, the former tennis champion and French superstar,
whether he would wear it. No, he answered, I couldn't do that to my kids. And
for a moment I felt reassured. Until I heard him admit that he weighs himself
three or four times a day. My amusement at the idea of men in red lace swiftly
turned to alarm at the thought of an athlete like Yannick Noah being obsessed
with his body image.
Body image is an issue close to my heart. It was the topic of
my Ph.D., research. Ten years ago I compared Saudi and British women and found
that Saudi women had a healthier body image than British women, at least in my
research sample. I strongly suspect that if the research were repeated today,
this would no longer be true. The social pressure on women to be thin and to
adhere to strict narrow standards of physical beauty is like a virus that has
spread through the world. As well as spreading through the globe, it has now
also crossed the gender divide. Whereas it used to be an essentially female
dissatisfaction, negative body image has become a male problem too. You don't
have to look very far to see it manifest itself. In the newsagents, you see
stacks of men's magazines proposing the latest diets and body building
techniques, advertising posters are just as likely to show images of men's
perfect torsos as women's bodies, the music channels pump out video after video
of both men and women with seemingly perfect and more worryingly - homogenous -
looks. Whether the singer is Egyptian or American, the video clip will include
strikingly similar images.
People are quick to blame negative body image on the media
and the fashion industry, but the truth is that it is a much more complex
problem. Negative body image is not something frivolous like men wearing red
lace; it's a much more serious problem. It is a pervasive dissatisfaction with
your physical appearance that spills over into the other domains of your life.
The problem is not wanting to look like Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie, the
problem is feeling devastated because you don't.
Appearances are important; male or female, we all want to
look good.
Maybe looking good means men wearing red lace, maybe it
simply means being fit and healthy, but one thing's for sure, the definition of
masculinity will continue to evolve.
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