THANK YOU ARNIE!
That is WHAT I needed!

Mark

[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:

>
>> QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS TO YOUR GOLF IMPROVEMENT DIET
>>
>> Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this 
>> true?
>> A: Your heart is only good for so many beats and that's it. Don't 
>> waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up 
>> your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can 
>> extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live 
>> longer? Take a nap.
>>
>>
>>
>> Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruit and vegetables?
>> A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat?
>> Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is
>> nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to 
>> your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of 
>> field grass (green leafy vegetable). A pork chop can give you 100% of 
>> your recommended daily allowance of vegetable slop.
>>
>>
>> Q: Is beer or wine bad for me?
>> A: Look, it goes to the earlier point about fruits and vegetables.
>> As we all know, scientists divide everything in the world into three 
>> categories: animal, mineral and vegetable. We all know that beer and 
>> wine are not animal and they are not on the periodic table of 
>> elements so that only leaves one thing, right? My advice: Have a 
>> burger and a beer and enjoy your liquid vegetables.
>>
>>
>>
>> Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
>> A: If you have a body and you have body fat your ratio is one to one. 
>> If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one etc.
>>
>>
>>
>> Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular 
>> exercise program?
>> A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain: Good.
>>
>>
>>
>> Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
>> A: You're not listening. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. 
>> They're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for 
>> you?
>>
>>
>> Q: What's the secret to healthy eating?
>> A: Thicker gravy.
>>
>>
>>
>> Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the 
>> middle?
>> A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle it gets bigger. You 
>> should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
>>
>>
>>
>> Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
>> A: Are you crazy? Cocoa beans: another vegetable. It's the best feel 
>> good food around!
>>
>>
>>
>> I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about 
>> food and diets. Have a cookie: flour is veggie! "When life hands you 
>> lemons ask for a bottle of tequila and salt."
>>
>>
>>
>


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