Throwing shurikens while blind folded, isn't that the term Udhay?

http://www.springerlink.com/content/vg7322727mgl1875/fulltext.html?MUD=MP

Society
© Springer Science+Business Media New York 2012
10.1007/s12115-012-9596-y
Symposium: Mating Games

Sexual Economics, Culture, Men, and Modern Sexual Trends
Roy F. Baumeister1, 3  and Kathleen D. Vohs2

(1) The Florida State University, Tallahassee, FL, USA
(2) Carlson School of Management, University of Minnesota, Minneapolis, MN,
USA
(3) Department of Psychology, 1107 W. Call St, Tallahassee, FL 32306-4301,
USA

Roy F. Baumeister
Email: baumeis...@psy.fsu.edu
Published online: 18 October 2012

Without Abstract
Roy F. Baumeister
is Social Psychology Area Director and Francis Eppes Eminent Scholar at The
Florida State University.
Kathleen D. Vohs
is Associate Professor , Carlson School of Management and Land O’Lakes
Professor of Excellence in Marketing at the University of Minnesota.



Across the late 20th century, ideas about sex came from two main sources.
One was evolutionary theory, based on the field of biology. The other was
feminist and social constructionist theory, based in the field of political
science. Though important insights have come from both sources, there was a
growing body of evidence that did not easily fit either of those. We
therefore turned to another field to develop a new theory. The field was
economics, and we labeled our theory “sexual economics” (Baumeister and
Vohs 2004). At first, our theory was constructed to fit what was already
known, making it an exercise in hindsight. It is therefore highly revealing
to see how the theory has fared in Regnerus and Uecker’s (2011) pioneering
studies of the recent, ongoing shifts in sexual behavior in American
society.

The value of an economic perspective is abundantly clear in Regnerus’s
work. Not only does he analyze behavior in terms of markets. In a political
democracy, majority rules, and such political principles have often
operated in human behavior. But not in sex. In fact, Regnerus shows over
and over that when it comes to sex, the minority rules. This is what
happens in economics, especially in the dynamics of supply and demand. When
supply outnumbers demand, the suppliers (the majority) are in a weak
position and must yield ground, such as by reducing their price. In
contrast, when demand outnumbers supply, the suppliers (now the minority)
have the advantage and can dictate the terms to their liking, such as by
raising the price.

In simple terms, we proposed that in sex, women are the suppliers and men
constitute the demand (Baumeister and Vohs 2004). Hence the
anti-democratic, seemingly paradoxical sex ratio findings that Regnerus
describes. When women are in the minority, the sexual marketplace conforms
to their preferences: committed relationships, widespread virginity,
faithful partners, and early marriage. For example, American colleges in
the 1950s conformed to that pattern. In our analysis, women benefit in such
circumstances because the demand for their sexuality exceeds the supply. In
contrast, when women are the majority, such as on today’s campuses as well
as in some ethnic minority communities, things shift toward what men
prefer: Plenty of sex without commitment, delayed marriage, extradyadic
copulations, and the like.

It is fashionable to describe all gender relations as reflecting the
oppression and victimization of women. When women were a minority of
students, this was interpreted as indicating that women were victims of
oppressive discrimination. Now that women are a majority, they are victims
because of not being able to dictate the terms of romantic and sexual
behavior. Much of Regnerus’s discussion respects this dominant tradition.
We also respect that fashion, but as social scientists interested in both
genders, we shall use this brief comment to redress the standard imbalance
by discussing some implications for men (cf. Baumeister and Vohs 2004).

Sexual marketplaces take the shape they do because nature has biologically
built a disadvantage into men: a huge desire for sex that makes men
dependent on women. Men’s greater desire puts them at a disadvantage, just
as when two parties are negotiating a possible sale or deal, the one who is
more eager to make the deal is in a weaker position than the one who is
willing to walk away without the deal. Women certainly desire sex too — but
as long as most women desire it less than most men, women have a collective
advantage, and social roles and interactions will follow scripts that give
women greater power than men (Baumeister et al. 2001). We have even
concluded that the cultural suppression of female sexuality throughout much
of history and across many different cultures has largely had its roots in
the quest for marketplace advantage (see Baumeister and Twenge 2002). Women
have often sustained their advantage over men by putting pressure on each
other to restrict the supply of sex available to men. As with any monopoly
or cartel, restricting the supply leads to a higher price.

It is worth pointing out that the cultural suppression of female sexuality
is a particular victory for sexual economics theory. The two dominant
theoretical perspectives about sex, evolutionary psychology and
feminist/constructionist theory, both strongly predicted the opposite. In a
rare agreement between those two, both views proposed that cultures
suppress female sexuality to serve male interests, and so male influence
has been paramount. Evolutionary theory said that the cultural suppression
of female sexuality arose because men wanted to restrain women’s sexuality
so as to be sure that their partners would be faithful (so the men could be
confident of paternity). Feminist theory almost always harks back to male
oppression, and so the cultural suppression of female sexuality reflected
men’s desires to dominate women, possess them, and/or prevent them from
finding sexual fulfillment. In both cases, the cultural suppression of
female sexuality should come from men. Yet the evidence overwhelmingly
indicated that the cultural suppression of female sexuality is propagated
and sustained by women (Baumeister and Twenge 2002). Only sexual economics
theory predicted that result. Similar to how OPEC seeks to maintain a high
price for oil on the world market by restricting the supply, women have
often sought to maintain a high price for sex by restricting each other’s
willingness to supply men with what men want.

Sometimes men have sought to improve their chances for sex by keeping women
at a disadvantage in terms of economic, educational, political, and other
opportunities (Baumeister and Vohs 2004). For example, researchers have
found that in New York in the 1800s, surprisingly high numbers of employed
women resorted to occasional prostitution to supplement their meager wages
(Elias et al. 1998). But in general this male strategy backfired. Women
appear to have realized collectively that sex was the main thing they had
to offer men in order to get a piece of society’s wealth, and so they
restricted sexual access as much as they could, to maintain a high price.
Recent work has found that across a large sample of countries today, the
economic and political liberation of women is positively correlated with
greater availability of sex (Baumeister and Mendoza 2011). Thus, men’s
access to sex has turned out to be maximized not by keeping women in an
economically disadvantaged and dependent condition, but instead by letting
them have abundant access and opportunity. In an important sense, the
sexual revolution of the 1970s was itself a market correction. Once women
had been granted wide opportunities for education and wealth, they no
longer had to hold sex hostage (Baumeister and Twenge 2002).

What does all this mean for men? The social trends suggest the continuing
influence of a stable fact, namely the strong desire of young men for
sexual activity. As the environment has shifted, men have simply adjusted
their behavior to find the best means to achieve this same goal. Back in
1960, it was difficult to get sex without getting married or at least
engaged, and so men married early. To be sure, this required more than
being willing to bend the knee, declare love, and offer a ring. To qualify
as marriage material, a man had to have a job or at least a strong prospect
of one (such as based on an imminent college degree). The man’s overarching
goal of getting sex thus motivated him to become a respectable stakeholder
contributing to society.

The fact that men became useful members of society as a result of their
efforts to obtain sex is not trivial, and it may contain important clues as
to the basic relationship between men and culture (see Baumeister 2010).
Although this may be considered an unflattering characterization, and it
cannot at present be considered a proven fact, we have found no evidence to
contradict the basic general principle that men will do whatever is
required in order to obtain sex, and perhaps not a great deal more. (One of
us characterized this in a previous work as, “If women would stop sleeping
with jerks, men would stop being jerks.”) If in order to obtain sex men
must become pillars of the community, or lie, or amass riches by fair means
or foul, or be romantic or funny, then many men will do precisely that.
This puts the current sexual free-for-all on today’s college campuses in a
somewhat less appealing light than it may at first seem. Giving young men
easy access to abundant sexual satisfaction deprives society of one of its
ways to motivate them to contribute valuable achievements to the culture.

The changes in gender politics since 1960 can be seen as involving a giant
trade, in which both genders yielded something of lesser importance to them
in order to get something they wanted more (Baumeister and Vohs 2004). As
Regnerus states, partly based on our own extensive survey of research
findings, men want sex, indeed more than women want it (Baumeister et al.
2001). Women, meanwhile, want not only marriage but also access to careers
and preferential treatment in the workplace.

The giant trade thus essentially involved men giving women not only easy
access but even preferential treatment in the huge institutions that make
up society, which men created. Today most schools, universities,
corporations, scientific organizations, governments, and many other
institutions have explicit policies to protect and promote women. It is
standard practice to hire or promote a woman ahead of an equally qualified
man. Most large organizations have policies and watchdogs that safeguard
women’s interests and ensure that women gain preferential treatment over
men. Parallel policies or structures to protect men’s interests are largely
nonexistent and in many cases are explicitly prohibited. Legal scholars,
for example, point out that any major new law is carefully scrutinized by
feminist legal scholars who quickly criticize any aspect that could be
problematic or disadvantageous to women, and so all new laws are
women-friendly. Nobody looks out for men, and so the structural changes
favoring women and disadvantaging men have accelerated (Baumeister and Vohs
2004).

All of this is a bit ironic, in historical context. The large institutions
have almost all been created by men. The notion that women were
deliberately oppressed by being excluded from these institutions requires
an artful, selective, and motivated way of looking at them. Even today, the
women’s movement has been a story of women demanding places and
preferential treatment in the organizational and institutional structures
that men create, rather than women creating organizations and institutions
themselves. Almost certainly, this reflects one of the basic motivational
differences between men and women, which is that female sociality is
focused heavily on one-to-one relationships, whereas male sociality extends
to larger groups networks of shallower relationships (e.g., Baumeister and
Sommer 1997; Baumeister 2010). Crudely put, women hardly ever create large
organizations or social systems. That fact can explain most of the history
of gender relations, in which the gender near equality of prehistorical
societies was gradually replaced by progressive inequality—not because men
banded together to oppress women, but because cultural progress arose from
the men’s sphere with its large networks of shallow relationships, while
the women’s sphere remained stagnant because its social structure
emphasized intense one-to-one relationships to the near exclusion of all
else (see Baumeister 2010). All over the world and throughout history (and
prehistory), the contribution of large groups of women to cultural progress
has been vanishingly small.

For present purposes, the irony is that men have collectively put
themselves at structural disadvantages in the organizations that men have
created. (Social scientists like ourselves naturally seek to test
hypotheses by considering contrary cases, as in how men fare in large
organizations built up by women, but there are too few such organizations
to permit general conclusions. The absence of such organizations is an
important and revealing fact.) The large social structures that comprise
the worlds of business, government and politics, economic relations,
science and technological innovation, and the like are male creations, and
yet the young men entering any of them are required to accept formal
policies that women will be treated preferentially at each step. How can we
account for this remarkable, ironic twist of history?

Indeed, the world of work is a daunting place for a young man today.
Feminists quickly point to the continued dominance of men at the top of
most organizations, but this is misleading if not outright disingenuous.
Men create most organizations and work hard to succeed in them. Indeed, an
open-minded scholar can search through history mostly in vain to find large
organizations created and run by women that have contributed anything
beyond complaining about men and demanding a bigger share of the male pie.

Why have men acquiesced so much in giving women the upper hand in society’s
institutions? It falls to men to create society (because women almost never
create large organizations or cultural systems). It seems foolish and
self-defeating for men then to meekly surrender advantageous treatment in
all these institutions to women. Moreover, despite many individual
exceptions, in general and on average men work harder at their jobs in
these institutions than women, thereby enabling men to rise to the top
ranks. As a result, women continue to earn less money and have lower status
than men, which paradoxically is interpreted to mean that women’s
preferential treatment should be continued and possibly increased (see
review of much evidence in Baumeister 2010). Modern society is not far from
embracing explicit policies of “equal pay for less work,” as one of us
recently proposed. Regardless of that prospect, it appears that
preferential treatment of women throughout the workforce is likely to be
fairly permanent. Because of women’s lesser motivation and ambition, they
will likely never equal men in achievement, and their lesser attainment is
politically taken as evidence of the need to continue and possibly increase
preferential treatment for them.

But this pattern of male behavior makes more sense if we keep in mind that
getting sex is a high priority for men, especially young men. Being at a
permanent disadvantage in employment and promotion prospects, as a result
of affirmative action policies favoring women, is certainly a cost to young
men, but perhaps not a highly salient one. What is salient is that sex is
quite readily available. As Regnerus reports, even a man with dismal career
prospects (e.g., having dropped out of high school) can find a nice
assortment of young women to share his bed.

Remember, too, that the ostensible career motivation of many men was
infused partly by the desire for sex. That is, one main purpose of work was
to make oneself attractive to women as a potential sex partner, including
as a husband as long as marriage was the main route to sex. Nowadays young
men can skip the wearying detour of getting education and career prospects
to qualify for sex. Nor does he have to get married and accept all those
costs, including promising to share his lifetime earnings and forego other
women forever. Female sex partners are available without all that.

So maybe the young men don’t care that much about how the major social
institutions in the world of work have become increasingly rigged to favor
women. Sex has become free and easy. This is today’s version of the opiate
of the (male) masses. The male who beds multiple women is enjoying life
quite a bit, and so he may not notice or mind the fact that his educational
and occupational advancement is vaguely hampered by all the laws and
policies that push women ahead of him. After all, one key reason he wanted
that advancement was to get sex, and he already has that. Climbing the
corporate ladder for its own sake may still hold some appeal, but
undoubtedly it was more compelling when it was vital for obtaining sex.
Success isn’t as important as it once was, when it was a prerequisite for
sex.

If men don’t need career success to get sex, then what if anything do they
need success for? Some research indicates that career motivation really
intensifies for men when they become fathers. Indeed, it has long been
known that the transition to parenthood has opposite effects by gender. New
mothers withdraw from their work and careers; new fathers embrace work and
career with enhanced seriousness and motivation (for a review see
Baumeister 1991).

Many of these changes are beyond anyone’s control, and so our comments here
are not meant to prescribe a radical shift in policies. Still, it is
instructive to consider how these changes may affect the future of society.

With regard to work, the societal changes are producing less contribution
by men and more by women. These might offset, with few or no costs to
society. Still, replacing male with female workers may bring some changes,
insofar as the two genders approach work differently. Compared to men,
women have higher rates of absenteeism, seek social rewards more than
financial ones, are less ambitious, work fewer hours overall, are more
prone to take extended career interruptions, and identify less with the
organizations they work for. They are more risk averse, resulting in fewer
entrepreneurs and inventions. (Baumeister 2010, noted an appalling gender
imbalance in new patents; nobody is seriously suggesting that the U.S.
Patent office systematically discriminates against women, but women simply
do not apply for patents in anything close to the rate that men do.) Women
are less interested in science and technology fields. They create less
wealth (for themselves and others).

Meanwhile, the implications of the recent social changes for marriage could
fill a book. Sexual economics theory has pointed to a wealth of data
depicting marriage as a transaction in which the male contributes status
and resources while the woman contributes sex (Baumeister and Vohs 2004).
How will that play out in the coming decades? The female contribution of
sex to the marriage is evanescent: As women age, they lose their sexual
appeal much faster than men lose their status and resources, and some
alarming evidence even indicates that wives rather quickly lose their
desire for sex (Arndt 2009). To sustain a marriage across multiple decades,
many husbands must accommodate to the reality of having to contribute work
and other resources to a wife whose contribution of sex dwindles sharply in
both quantity and quality—and who also may disapprove sharply of him
seeking satisfaction in alternative outlets such as prostitution,
pornography, and extramarital dalliance.

We speculate that today’s young men may be exceptionally ill prepared for a
lifetime of sexual starvation that is the lot of many modern husbands. The
traditional view that a wife should sexually satisfy her husband regardless
of her own lack of desire has been eroded if not demolished by feminist
ideology that has encouraged wives to expect husbands to wait patiently
until the wife actually desires sex, with the result that marriage is a
prolonged episode of sexual starvation for the husband. (A memorable
anecdote from Arndt’s 2009 diary study on marital sexuality involved a
couple in which the wife refused sex so often that the husband finally said
that they would not have sex again until the wife initiated it. When Arndt
interviewed them nine years later, he was still waiting.) Today’s young men
spend their young adulthood having abundant sex with multiple partners, and
that seems to us to be an exceptionally poor preparation for a lifetime of
sexual starvation.

We do not mean to downplay the struggles and challenges that beset young
women (and older women) today. Our focus on men was simply meant as a
counterbalance to the Regnerus article that couched its main implications
in terms of what current circumstances meant for women. As the originators
of sexual economics theory, we seek to adopt the perspective of what is
best for the system, not the individuals involved. Throughout history, men
and women have needed each other and have managed to create mutually
beneficial partnerships (Baumeister 2010). The ground continues to shift,
and yet somehow the two genders manage to find each other, have sex, make
families, and create another generation. We appreciate Regnerus’s various
contributions (this issue; 2011) to explain how the ground has shifted and
the terms of exchange changed. This comment has sought to elucidate other
ways in which social and cultural changes create a new context in which the
age-old problems of bringing men and women together must be solved.

Although we have noted warning signs and problems, we remain optimistic.
Despite the obstacles and changing contingencies, men and women have always
managed to find each other and work together to create a modicum of
happiness for both and to create a sphere in which children can grow,
thrive, and sustain the culture for another few decades. The coming
generation will face novel challenges, but somehow we think they will
muddle through and manage to reinvent family life yet again.

Further Reading

Arndt, B. 2009. The Sex Diaries: Why Women go off Sex and other Bedroom
Battles. Carlton: Melbourne University Press.

Baumeister, R. F. 1991. Meanings of Life. New York: Guilford Press.

Baumeister, R. F. 2010. Is There Anything Good About Men? New York: Oxford
University Press.

Baumeister, R. F., & Mendoza, J. P. 2011. Cultural Variations in the Sexual
Marketplace: Gender Equality Correlates with More Sexual Activity. The
Journal of Social Psychology, 151, 350–360.


Baumeister, R. F., & Sommer, K. L. 1997. What Do Men Want? Gender
Differences and Two Spheres of Belongingness: Comment on Cross and Madson
(1997). Psychological Bulletin, 122, 38–44.


Baumeister, R. F., & Twenge, J. M. 2002. Cultural Suppression of Female
Sexuality. Review of General Psychology, 6, 166–203.


Baumeister, R. F., & Vohs, K. D. 2004. Sexual economics: Sex As Female
Resource for Social Exchange in Heterosexual Interactions. Personality and
Social Psychology Review, 8, 339–363.


Baumeister, R. F., Catanese, K. R., & Vohs, K. D. 2001. Is there a gender
difference in strength of sex drive? Theoretical views, conceptual
distinctions, and a review of relevant evidence. Personality and Social
Psychology Review, 5, 242–273.


Elias, J. E., Bullough, V. L., Elias, V., & Brewer, G. 1998. Prostitution:
On whores, hustlers, and johns. New York: Prometheus.

Regnerus, M., & Uecker, J. 2011. Premarital Sex in America: How Young
Americans Meet, Mate, and Think about Marrying. New York: Oxford University
Press.

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