RE: [Sndbox] Moron For Hire

[Charles]

Cool, good luck.   Charles Mims http://www.the-sandbox.org     From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of AJ Sent: Monday, January 05, 2004 10:12 PM To: 'The Sandbox Discussion List' Subject: RE: [Sndbox] Moron For Hire LOL,  I had a impromptu meeting with one of the big wigs with the company I work for. My bass is leaving and he “suggested” I submit a rsume for a Production managers job coming up, so I did.   The big wig said he did not know I had such proficient experience in upper management doing the maintenance management job I am doing now. So I might get the promotion. J  Time will tell but I have learnt not to get my hopes up.  If they bid the job outside of this plant I only have people from 93 other plants to go against.  L   It would almost be like a little vacation for us.  I have to travel to a majority of there plants for additional company training and it is all expenses paid and the cool part is JEN gets to come along as well.    We want to go to Florida this spring to sight see and it is ironic because my new boss today said that he is going to send me to there Florida location to go over some new sort of Mytec equipment and he needs me to learn the component boards and something about the I/C chips.   So now they are going to pay for me to go there and guess what, JEN gets to go along, LOL.   That will be a big savings in travel expenses. Just thought I would share.  ( I usually do not talk about myself in here).       AJ From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of Charles Sent: Sunday, January 04, 2004 7:02 PM To: 'The Sandbox Discussion List' Subject: [Sndbox] Moron For Hire           Moron For Hire Here are actual excerpts from real resumes and cover letters... And these people think they can get a job? I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience. I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreasheet progroms. Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year. Wholly responsible for two(2) failed financial institutions. Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave Failed bar exam with relatively high grades. It's best for employers that I not work with people. Let's meet, so you can 'ooh' and 'aah' over my experience. You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time. Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details. I was working for my mom until she decided to move. Marital status: single: Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No commitments I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse. I am loyal to my employer at all costs... Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail. I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely no one and absolutely nothing. My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I possess no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage. I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant. Personal interests: donating blood. Fourteen gallons so far. As indicted, I have over five years of analyzing investments. Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store. Note: Please don't misconstrue my 14 jobs as 'job-hopping'. I have never quit a job. Marital status: often. Children: various Reason for leaving last job: They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 am every morning. I couldn't work under those conditions. The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous employers. Finished eighth in my class of ten. References: none. I've left a path of destruction behind me.

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