Subject: How Many Christians Does It Take to Change a
Lightbulb?


Charismatic:  Only one. Hands already in the air.

Pentecostal: Ten. One to change the bulb and nine to
pray against the spirit of 
darkness.

Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at
predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.

Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb,
and three committees to approve the change and decide
who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one
to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much
better the old one was.

Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four
wives to tell him how to do 
it.

Unitarians:  Undetermined. We choose not to make a
statement either in favor of or against the need for a
light bulb.  However, if in your own journey you 
have found that light bulbs work for you, that is
fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a
modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday
service, in which we will explore a number of light
bulb traditions, including incandescent, 
fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which
are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is
bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You
can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. 
Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. 
Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while
five men review church 
lighting policy.

Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.



Amish:

What's a light bulb? 
 


=====
Happiness lies for those who cry,
those who hurt,
those who have searched
and those who have tried.
For only they can appreciate the importance
of people who have touched their lives.

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