Recently I went to Lynn Lewin's practica here in L.A. for ladies who lead 
(www.casadepractica.com).  There were six women and two men, counting me, at 
the practica, which is held in a garage turned dance venue with a beautiful 
wooden floor which has just enough give to feel soft but not like a trampoline. 
 

Before I went I scanned the last couple of years of TANGO-L archives for 
pointers on following, since I went to learn how to follow.  I found enough on 
leading to fill a doctoral dissertation but almost nothing on following - 
unless you count followers complaining about bad leading!

Here are some of the things I learned, most given me by those I practiced with. 
 From past experience learning many different dances I know that I may have to 
change or even discard what I'm learning now.

Following is not passive.  It includes communication using the silent language 
of our bodies, with followers doing much active "listening."  Leaders also must 
listen to their partner's body language, so I'd had plenty of practice doing 
this.  Some of those skills helped, but I didn't instantly become expert at 
doing it as a follower.

At first with each partner I was a bit tense but as we became acquainted and I 
found I could trust her my body relaxed.  With a couple of partners later on in 
the evening I began to feel a, perhaps quietness is the best word, from my 
body.  Yet it wasn't the relaxation that comes before sleep, but a very awake 
feeling.

I had trouble with my right hand at first.  I was tense and pushed with it.  
Later (under my partners' urging) I began to learn to simply leave where she 
placed it in the beginning, supported by my arm, letting it flex a little but 
returning to a central position.

Different partners wanted my right hand oriented differently and I had to learn 
to match their desire.  Luckily none wanted it oriented in a  painful or 
awkward arrangement and I didn't have to resist their preference.

My left arm rested along the top of her shoulders in close embrace.  I had to 
fine-tune how heavy or light I rested it.  Too little and our connection was 
poorer; too much and the weight would become painful.

A couple of leaders positioned me further away and had me place my left hand 
just above her biceps.  With this I had to learn not only to keep my arm from 
drooping but also to grasp firmly but not painfully.

I had some trouble leaning into my partners the way they wanted and still need 
to work on this.  I always thought that my slight forward lean as a leader 
would be the same as a follower, but there seem to be subtle differences that 
go beyond mere physics.  I suspect that only experience will fine-tune this.  
And I wonder if women's jokes about men followers needing to wear high heels 
are more than jokes.  I always thought heels were just for looks, but maybe 
they give followers some real benefits.

When moving a couple of my partners urged me to step back straighter and 
stretch my toes a bit to reach the floor.  This helped keep our knees from 
bumping together.  It seemed to have other benefits that I felt but don't 
understand.  But then intellectual understanding is not the only kind.  Our 
bodies also have kinesthetic smarts, which don't go through the higher brain.

I've long looked down on the 8-count basic.  As a beginning follower I 
appreciated it because once my leader started it I knew just what to do, unlike 
the nervous uncertainty when any step could bring a surprise.  I suppose it's a 
matter of using it to learn, then being able to discard it when I gain skill at 
taking each single step with confidence.

Any experienced followers out there who can give us newbies pointers on how to 
follow?  AND how better to learn to follow?

Larry de Los Angeles

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