Myk, your questions deserve some response. Here's my humble opinion.
Embrace.
1. When a leader's embrace is gentle but firm, this provides a sense of
security to the follower. When a follower feels secure, that person can follow
you better. Gentle and firm sound like a paradoxical situation but I think of
being a baby held in someone's arms and feeling secure because the hold is
gentle but firm.
2. I also like an embrace that is flexible, allowing the follower to move
within the framed space, even in a close embrace. Let me suggest that you think
how you like to be held for three minutes or so, and you get the idea that you
must be allowed to breath in and out freely when you are in that hold. I always
imagine the bandoneon's expansion and compression which is undoubtedly an
exaggerated way of looking at how the embracing arm can allow the framed space
(and the follower in it) to "breath".
Fun moves.
They are fun, but the leader must gauge the follower's ability to execute the
moves without injury to both dancers and those around them. I enjoy them myself
but only if I am confident that the leader has the correct timing and stability
to support me. Skill is required from both dancers.
Music, music, music.
This factor determines whether you walk simply or swirl busily. Let the music
be your guide, and respect those around you while lose yourself in the music. I
can talk forever about musicality, but I won't do so here.
What's regarded a good dance?
I dare say it depends on one's mood, so it can vary from one moment to another.
At 1am at a milonga I am happy to relax into soft movements. But if a vals is
played, I am prepared to dance more expressively. If a leader is sensitive and
picks up on the follower's ability and mood, the leader can allow the follower
more freedom to determine how she implements his lead. It's about give and take
- a converstaion between two people.
I hope this helps.
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