Buzz Kill Mystery Illness Wipes Out Bees Frank Rumpenhorst/Getty Images
Mystery Illness Wipes Out Bees

A mysterious malady that has been killing honeybees en masse since 2005 has drastically expanded this year, wiping out as much as 40 to 50 percent of the hives needed to pollinate America's fruits and vegetables. Scientists have been unable to determine the cause of the mass deaths, but some beekeepers and researchers blame a new class of pesticides called neonicotinoids that are now bred into plants themselves. (Not surprisingly, the pesticide industry disputes this.) Until this year, beekeepers in California's San Joaquin Valley had only been losing a third of their bees, but the deaths have increased dramatically this year. The largest farm, in South Dakota, said it lost 55 percent of its bees this year. The EPA has sent a top official and chemical experts to California for discussions.


Undoubtedly, this was brought from Europe by that same, single caver at the same time he was bringing WNS, and subsequently spread by other cavers who recklessly wander through apiary sites (or never get near one) without washing their clothes or brushing their teeth, or wringing their hands enough over the situation.

The only thing that is unexplained is why researchers and beekeepers have not blamed cavers...yet.

It's bound to come since "scientists have been unable to determine the cause of the mass deaths" (but blame, without proof, is easily offered). Clearly, in such situations where the most logical explanations are not vetted or are dismissed in favor of those less likely, it has to be the cavers who are at fault.

I'm now convinced it was that same careless caver who caused the meteorite to hit Russia. Clearly, using the WNS and bee cases as examples, nothing else can adequately explain why that happened. Somebody needs to catch that European guy and give him a time-out before he causes any more calamities.

---end satire---

---begin serious comment---

I'm still waiting for something other than the continuing and complete lack of scientific data showing the WNS human vector; the ongoing unsubstantiated claim of such is nevertheless arbitrarily and capriciously used to justify closing caves. "Could", "might", "may" or "possibly" does not constitute rigorous scientific inquiry nor results, nor form the basis for any rational reason to restrict access.

Stephen Fleming
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