Nancy: you didn't do your own asking because you used too many big words. No more 'domesticity'. It's keeping the home ready for your man. Just remember that 'pregnant' is the biggest word you should ever use. (Geez, it's hard to keep this to 2 syllable words.)
Don't say 'vocabulary' when 'words' will do. Don't say 'potential' when 'like, you know, it can, like, maybe, do more' will do. Don't say 'limited' when 'not so big' will do. Can I help co-author your book? My husband would like the big bucks we can make. He will let me use my married name because (1) it is pretty common and (2) my maiden name has more than 2 syllables. I will need an extreme make-over with lipsocution (we can use that word) and tummy-tuck, and what do you call that thing where they take the waddle off the chin? I need that too. Then I can do the book tour with you. Like the lady I saw on CNN last night. I want to wear no heel shoes, have big boobs and provide vague advice that can be used any way you want to. You need a few more sentences in your arsenal (oops, there I go, using that big word)... "I love Nascar." "Why are all those men piling on top of each other?" "Why don't they just all tackle each other?" At a football game ask, "What inning is it?" At a baseball game ask, "Who got that touchdown?" Make all sports sound like sex: "He shoots, he scores." "Penetration" "Put it in" "Looks like he has a few extra inches on HIS shaft." "Can you fix my ___? I just don't know what's wrong with it. It makes this whooop whooop noise." Learn to prepare beef, but ALWAYS let him put it on the grill. Then rave about what a great cook he is. Remember to always order the cheapest thing on the menu when dating and just push the food around on your late and say, "Oh, I never eat much." And act very drunk after a half glass of wine. Use lots of mascara and don't wear your glasses. But, to be serious and fair, the article did say something about how women who are more educated find that men are not interesting enough!!! Annette Quoting [EMAIL PROTECTED]: > Dear Tipsters: > > As I am preparing to re-enter the marriage market, please do me the > following favors: > > 1) Don't use so many big words in your posts (two-syllable maximum, please) > > as I am practicing using a more limited vocabulary so as not to threaten or > > frighten away any promising potential mates. > 2) Send recipes and housekeeping tips to the list so that I may better > prepare for a life of simple domesticity. Later I can write a self-help book > to > help other ladies find the joy of domestic bliss (but of course under a > pseudonym so my man won't feel all annoyed and emasculated by my success.) > 3) Send me your phone number so I can call you and practice the only four > phrases I will ever say on a date: > > "You are so right you big, strong, clever man you." > " I don't know will you help me figure it out?" > "Whatever you say, studmuffin." > and "OOOOO shin-eeee". (When I get the big engagement ring which is the > reward for behaving as if I have two functioning neurons. > > Nancy "Lights on nobody home" Melucci > Huntington Beach CA > Long Beach City College > > > > > --- > You are currently subscribed to tips as: [EMAIL PROTECTED] > To unsubscribe send a blank email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] > Annette Kujawski Taylor, Ph. D. Department of Psychology University of San Diego 5998 Alcala Park San Diego, CA 92110 [EMAIL PROTECTED] --- You are currently subscribed to tips as: [email protected] To unsubscribe send a blank email to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
