Happy Valentines Day.
Valentine's Day for me is no big deal. My angelic and
beloved Susan and I have what I call an "E-marriage." It rests on our
"E-love." How's that for up-to-date marital tags. No, we do not have an
Electronic-love and marriage. And, I don't mean that for these past
thirty-four years we've had an Easy-love and marriage. I mean we have an
Everyday-love and marriage, an Effort love and marriage, and an Enduring
love and marriage.
What makes a great marriage. True love many will say. What is
true love. Darn if I know, but I know it when I see it. I do know that a
good marriage is a merger not only of two people, but of love and work.
It's not enough to say I love you. You have to work at loving you and
being lovable.
Oh, sure we had that one fairy tale incredible moment when we both
knew, when I got so knocked off my feet that I still haven't been able to
get up. It occurred one late November evening in 1966, only seven weeks
after we met on a mutually reluctant blind date, on the campus of Duke
University when my "friends" kidnapped her and left fearful me calling
out the police to help in my frantic search. But, we had to work for that
ONE moment to grow into a few, and then into several, and then into many,
and then into always; we had to work for that moment to grow into an hour,
into a day, into a week, into a month, into a year, into thirty-four
years.
We worked to make sure that each day was a beginning and part of a
continuation, that each day we fell in love as if we were long lost
lovers, that each day was like a flirting date, that each day was like a
slow dance by candlelight, that each day was like an adventure. No great
speeches of commitment. No grand gestures of devotion. No proclamations
of devotion. Just little and mostly unspoken little things a smile here,
a glassy gaze there, a slight caress everywhere. The small everyday
romantic whispers, small everyday enchanting touches, everyday playful
acts, everyday tender surprises, everyday quiet cuddles, everyday nibbles
and pecks, everyday tease, everyday giddy and zany gestures are great
events for heightening and perpetuating the passion, adoration,
spontaneity, romance, excitement, respect, and trust--and have gotten us
through the wet sand of challenges and crises, the betters and worses,
sicknesses and healths, the sorrows and joys. We listen more than we talk;
we talk more with our eyes than with our mouths. All of this has allowed
us to venture together, explore together, discover together, grow
together, change together.
We don't have a 50-50 marriage; we don't fit lock and key. We are
opposites that attracted. The asymetry, however, does keep things
interesting. No boredom or dullsville. Lots of bantering. No
taking-for-granted. Lots of connection and involvement. No routine. And,
believe me, we're not perfect. It's too much to ask of each other to be
the perfect mate. I won't speak for me, but I can tell you that Susan is
okay. She pretty good. She darn good. She's a keeper.
What does this have to do with teaching? Everything. After all
teaching is a love affair; it is involvement and connection with people.
And, you have to work daily and constantly and hard if you want good
teaching no less and in the same manner as seeking a good marriage.
I think everyone has compassion, faith, courage, strength, hope,
patience, sympathy, empathy, caring, compassion, love, belief. It's the
successful teachers, like the successful lovers, who learn to use them.
The real, enduring, and lasting "E" in e-education, like a firm
e-marriage, is not the technology of electronic education as so many are
touting. It sure shouldn't isn't easy or effortless education. It's the
successful teachers who, like the successful lovers, practice the real "e"
of their craft: effort-education, exciting-education, exploring-education,
enthusiastic-education, everyone-education, energetic-education,
encouraging-education, empathetic-education, and emotional-education. And,
above all, everyone-education. When they do, e-education, like an e-love
and an e-marriage, means lasts and endures, lasts and endures, lasts and
endures.
Make it a good day.
--Louis--
Louis Schmier [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Department of History www.therandomthoughts.com
Valdosta State University www.halcyon.com/arborhts/louis.html
Valdosta, GA 31698 /~\ /\ /\
912-333-5947 /^\ / \ / /~\ \ /~\__/\
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-_~ / "If you want to climb mountains, \ /^\
_ _ / don't practice on mole hills" - \____
