Alton, Thanks for sharing, it serves as a reminder that we must be aware of how much energy caretaking takes out of our helper. I know that I, for one, don't say thank you nearly often enough!! janh
--- On Thu, 9/3/09, Alton Ryder <a-ry...@comcast.net> wrote: I stumbled upon this old note, posted to the list a decade ago, and decided to post it again. Subject: spousal support Date: Mon, 29 Mar 1999 I'm ready to carve a piece of granite with my fingernails or do something else as difficult to show my appreciation for my wife. I have before stated my appreciation for her support during this malady, but the recent sharing of tales of less spousal support has heightened my gratitude. When I first came home from the hospital, I had neither the strength nor the flexibility to attend to my own needs. I was in bed, in diapers, and wearing a Texas catheter. All of which needed frequent changes. I could recognize an impending bowel movement, but I could not resist it. I remember Betty answering my call in the middle of the night to come attend to the bedpan and to clean me afterward. I wonder if I could have been so uncomplaining if she were the one who was ill. Even now, almost two years later, her support and her willingness have not diminished. Thankfully, the need for such support has almost gone away. I am so lucky to have married her. Alton, who intends no hurt to those less fortunate