Clarkson and her co-host Snoop Dogg were the worst things of the horrible
Eurovision clone that was the American Song Contest. That she continues to do
horribly in these things doesn't surprise me.
Best,David
On Friday, July 26, 2024 at 10:50:22 PM PDT, Kevin M.
<drunkbastar...@gmail.com> wrote:
Kevin M. (RPCV)
On Fri, Jul 26, 2024 at 10:42 PM Jim Ellwanger <train...@ellwanger.tv> wrote:
Oh, there's accordion music in both places. In heaven, it's the work of Weird
Al, John Linnell, and cumbia bands composed of women who look like Salma Hayek
and/or Sofia Vergara. In hell, it's performed by everyone else.
A fair point, and one I cannot criticize
I probably should have turned it off at about the point that Kelly Clarkson
just couldn't believe that they'd come up with the brilliant new idea of
combining heavy metal and classical music.
It was one of many things she found “incredible”.
It seemed really odd that NBC had a big "commercial-free coverage" setup,
complete with sponsor logos, for about the first hour, and then they abandoned
it. Guess Coca-Cola and Delta were only willing to pay so much.
The five minute in-ceremony advertisement for Louis Vuitton must’ve cost a
nickel or two.
I also didn't hear them explain why the U.S. team wasn't sailing in until near
the end of the parade (because future host countries now go at the end, just
before the current host country) until the broadcast actually got to that
point. I knew the U.S. was supposed to be with the E's in French, so I was in a
state of mild confusion for quite a while.
On Jul 26, 2024, at 10:26 PM, Kevin M. <drunkbastar...@gmail.com> wrote:
The irony of Steven Spielberg’s opening narration, talking about the importance
of good storytelling, then leading us into a cacophony of disjointed
audio/video gibberish.
The dancers were the opposite of synchronized. They were so asynchronous that
they must’ve rehearsed to be that out of sequence with one another. I mean, it
had to be intentional to be that bad. If you put 100 gorillas in a chorus line,
statistically one or two of them will move in unison, but not so our
professional dance troop.
There was an angel on a bridge playing an accordion. If heaven is filled with
accordion music, I’m ok being sent down to the bad place when I die.
Several minutes devoted to celebrating threesomes. Is group sex an Olympic
event this year?
A singing, decapitated head of Marie Antoinette is odd, but she was smiling.
Severed heads should not be smiling… that’s just creepy. Then the simulated
blood-soaked building. Kids are going to be describing this moment to
therapists.
It’s France’s oldest marching band, but rather than hear them perform, they are
going to awkwardly engulf a French pop singer, because nothing says France like
a claustrophobic woman surrounded by a gang of men in funny hats.
Kelly Clarkson used the word “incredible” to describe everything. You know what
I find incredible? That Kelly Clarkson gets paid to speak. Somebody buy the
woman a thesaurus.
The torch … it was a giant joint. It wasn’t a torch that looked a little bit
like a joint… it was a giant joint that was only a little bit like a torch.
After 90 minutes, they’d only gotten to athletes from countries starting with
the letter C. For my own sanity, I had to turn it off.
I remember during the opening ceremony for the London games, watching a musical
number featuring dying children in hospital beds, I thought that was the
weirdest moment in Olympic history. Here we are in 2024, and I can only say:
Where the hell are the singing dying kids?
Kevin M. (RPCV)
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