> I don't know how to see the actual temperature,

Recommend you use turbostat to observe package and core temperatures.
turbostat is included in the linux-tools-common package (I think).

> but I know that it goes
> high (i) by touching the bottom of the laptop and burning myself, and
>(ii) because it gets to a point (remember: thermald is off) where
> everything becomes incredibly slow.

Yes, that is the last level of protection before shutdown.
clock modulation is turned on at 50%. The intel pstate cpu frequency driver is 
fundamentally incompatible with clock modulation and so your CPU frequencies 
will be become locked at a very low frequency. You should be able to observe 
this with turbostat also.

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https://bugs.launchpad.net/bugs/1600599

Title:
  Thermald is totally broken, or its default configuration is

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