To my beloved Mayor

The Urban Dweller battles the Rains

-       The latest hit in Kampala is K’Nigeria  “bottle a man and save energy” 
– all billboards and radio stations have announced the song – now we know.

-       And Wittgenstein Ludwig a former chair and predecessor to Isaac Newton 
was asked the most difficult thing to do, he replied,  “ helping a fly out of a 
bottle”.  

-       On Hoima road – at the so called Kasubi market heavy down pour has 
swept all mud on the newly constructed Kasubi road, down the gullies to cover 
the emerging pot holes near the gas station, indeed KCC will have no job to do 
there and then.

-       Further ahead – rainwater has swept the road clean of all tribes of 
garbage offering drainage water an opportunity to hop over dug trenches into 
the road.
 
-       Wonderful Kampala City Council. At times one is caught between crying 
and laughter!

-       Rubigi has been camaraderie to bicycle transporters, turning 
pedestrians bad luck into a BodaBoda money-minting occasion. I was about to 
shout Swines, Buffons but……

-       From Bwaise across the big swamp to Hoima road disaster has struck.
 
-       Heavens opened up for a concrete four hours marathon  – and hell broke 
loose like nothing you’ve never seen before. 

-       Water among the African, is fantastic scenery of bizarre absurdity.  It 
was time for me to catch a glimpse on reality – is it termed a real time event?

-       My fine shoe had betrayed me at first – trying to squeeze myself on now 
very narrow pavements to save the shine on it. 

-       This is Kampala in Afrika – blame God who created rain!

-       BodaBoda cyclists never offered space for quick locomotion, have long 
hijacked the pavements to escape natures’ calamity. 

-       Water was in direct battle, a serious confrontation with the African.

-       All the same, I hit the road – for no time is better than this time to 
understand the battle on Kampala streets and its suburbs, between rains, 
citizen merchants and their merchandise.

-       Poor me forced off the pavement – a Matatu came to an instant stop, a 
squeal to be precise, almost knocking me off the road. Instantly a passenger 
jumps out – a smartly dressed lady of no cheap variety. 

-       A handbag swung turns it into an umbrella covering well-tended 
hairstyle I mean a hair do, now heavily bombarded with tropic torrential rains 
and nowhere to hide - gods’ tears turn a hair do into disorder.

-       With a sudden bust of motor engines – BodaBoda cyclist had spotted a 
coin and tens of them almost ride into her calling on top of their voice Mamma 
tugende (Madam board this one).

-       Uganda and her citizens are gripped into market terrorism, a hysteria 
only comparable to paranoia.

-       Newspaper vendors and many other clans of ware peddlers, whenever wind 
blows water into their direction they squeeze further into the legs standing 
above them! 

-       Kampala becomes more exciting and awesome.

-       I mind my own business – I have to pick my gumboots to catch on a 
battle of wits; as water battles the citizens.

-       Matatus are at a standstill in their insect file motion – reason being 
there is low traffic police manning the junctions. 

-       The sole one I have seen at a junction is drenched all through – I 
remembered recent TV documentary of crumbling police resident at Naguru- I feel 
so sorry for the guy.

-        UTODA (what does it stand for!) hey hey; yes they are called “traffic 
wardens” are hidden away from the elements.  Chaos becomes an ordered.

-       30 minutes jammed in a terrible traffic pack, a distance of not less 
than 500 meters is covered.

-       I jump off the ramshackle piece of steel – and hit the street again 
heading towards a business mercantile lane down town mayor.

-       A milliard of merchandise stacked away in heavy white and black 
polythene bags – as does business proprietors tells of the misery Kampalians 
and Ugandans face on a daily basis.

-       Water can be really treacherous, some wooden benches, rakes or 
something like that have been thrown off their crooked legs just by sheer force 
are floating down into the streets.

-       Trust Matatu drivers as owner pick their pieces, they Matatu driver dog 
them at such terrible speed missing them by a whisker. 

-       Driving was created in Uganda I reason for once. 

-       Water rapider - is a testing time especially for women- I look over and 
virtually all street traders stand still in a heavy down pour covered in 
polythene bags close to their merchandise. 

-       Everywhere!

-       Kampala City council is a deny of incompetence, a paradise of dupes, 
bedbugs only good for nothing- does KCC have an investment fund?   

-        Previously I have been trying my eyes on Uganda owned buildings NONE 
and true to Africanism few if none is full furnished and finished. Political 
science and kyankwanzi ideology.

-       Kampala skyline therefore is doted with unfinished flats, call them 
skyscrapers now named towers, arcades, malls, you name it. Aaaaahhh I forgot 
this annnndd also COMPLEXES indeed!

-       There is a real problem with Africans – this must be true Africans 
nature. I will soon branch into anthropology.

-       I for one don’t TRUST politicians and their ilk in KCC –NO never 
thieves.

-       Just before the taxi park, water is gushing like hell, jumping over all 
hindrances and taking with it some human property, pouring directly into the 
old taxi park with such force, that a man of sizeable measure is almost through 
off the steps.

-        Are they steps?!  NO bricks put together UTODA style, I think to make 
steps. That is it.

-       I am now soggy all though – AND THE CIRCUS TRAIN has just started. I 
endure.

-       My thoughts falls back to were KCC people are now – good lord in their 
white house I mean Hall indeed or in their four wheel drive.

-       By the time it is getting dark – in Ntinda, Kawempe, Bwaise, Ndebba, 
Natete – pandemonium has broken up with some shifting entire homes,  more or 
less man made lakes are in clear formation………somewhere else.

-       It is Kampla, and if times allows I will comeback with a continuation 
……and on COLONIALISM. 

-       Viva the revolution. Viva KAMPALA CITY COUNCIL. Long Live the Mayor, 
your humble servants and the citizens – Ndebba road is now a banana plantation 
and rich fishing ground.

Bwanika a planner still at 

[EMAIL PROTECTED]
      www.idrcounslting.com
 

Bwanika 
________

http://www.idrconsulting.com

--> for your consultancy needs






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