At the Concord (NC) Rotary Club meeting of Wednesday, July 11th, I presented the Fellowship Report, offering a tribute to the late Andy Griffith. Part of my presentation was my reading of the minutes from a September 1965 meeting of the Mayberry Rotary Club, which I wrote in the spirit of both TAGS and Rotary. The Mayberry Rotary Club didn't exist but could very well have, since Rotary International's motto of "Service Above Self" certainly fits the kindness displayed by most Mayberrians.
In these minutes, in a couple of cases I fudged the timeline -- by Sept. of '65 Barney had left Mayberry, and Howard Sprague had yet to be introduced (although when viewers first met Howard it was established that he'd lived quietly in Mayberry for years) -- so please enjoy the following not as a strict testament to continuity but instead as a tribute to the greatest television show of all time. One more thing: Are there any other Rotarians out there? --Michael Eury *MINUTES OF THE MAYBERRY ROTARY CLUB MEETING* *Wednesday, September 15, 1965* *Mayberry Hotel* *Recorded by Howard Sprague, Club Secretary* *Proofread by Howard’s mother* * * Meeting was called to order at 12:15 PM by President Andy Taylor. Lunch was prepared by Miss Bee Taylor, with Juanita Beasley from the Bluebird Diner waiting on tables. The menu was pot roast, stewed potatoes and carrots, and green beans. President Andy remarked that Aunt Bee’s lunch was “Mmmm-mmm-mmm.” However, her side dish of pickles was poorly received, with one Rotarian muttering under his breath that they were “kerosene cucumbers.” Reverend Tucker delivered the invocation, about the application of Rotary’s Four-Way Test to everyday life. When he discussed “Will it build goodwill and better friendships?” he fired a deliberate gaze at Floyd the Barber and Mr. Foley from the grocery store, since they’d recently been arguing over a punch in the nose incident that took place nearly 20 years ago. Barney Fife attempted to lead the club in a recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance, but couldn’t remember the words. Luckily President Andy was there to nudge him along. Goober Pyle presented the Fellowship Report, amusing his fellow Rotarians by taking off on Cary Grant—“Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy, Judy.” The club was pleased to welcome an unexpected guest, Gomer Pyle, home on leave from the Marines, who burst into the room shouting, “Soo-prise, soo-prise, soo-prise!” Mr. Meldrim the bank president recommended that the Mayberry Rotary Club take up a special collection to buy old Asa the bank guard a new gun, since his was all rusty and falling apart. Barney Fife passed around his deputy’s hat for the collection, at which time Floyd Lawson joked, “Don’t take any wooden nickels, Barney.” The club collected $12.38. Discussion was given to this year’s Mayberry Rotary fundraiser. President Andy suggested a benefit concern by Bobby Fleet and His Band with a Beat and Barney Fife suggested a Kissing Booth with the Fun Girls from Mount Pilot, but the club voted to adopt Gomer Pyle’s recommendation to sponsor a Halloween Haunted House at Old Man Rimshaw’s place. Today’s guest speaker was one of our own, Mayberry Deputy Barney Fife, with a program called “The Art of Self Defense,” where he dazzled the club with his judo moves he learned from his lessons with Mr. Izamoto in Mount Pilot. However, Barney’s presentation, and the meeting itself, was rudely interrupted at 12:45 by a rock thrown through the hotel window. Tied to the rock was a note with a crudely scribbled message: “You won’t let me join Ro-tar-y so here’s a rock from Ernest T.” President Andy quickly adjourned the meeting with a brisk recitation of the Four-Way Test and he and Deputy Fife darted out in pursuit of the rock-throwing Ernest T. Bass. On their way out, Goober Pyle called out to Andy, “Tell Ernest T. that Goober says hey!” *Meeting minutes respectfully presented by Howard Sprague,* *Secretary, Mayberry Rotary Club* _______________________________________________ WBMUTBB mailing list WBMUTBB@wbmutbb.com http://www.mayberry.com/tagsrwc/wbmutbb/
