Friends,

We cannot judge that all blind with sited, sited with sited or blind with blind are happy couples. Each of the types has unique sets of problems. As blind with blind might face some day to day practical problems, on the other hand the sited with blind might face the problem of over shadowing the blind personality with sited person. So the challenges are every ware and have to be dealt with the skills and experience.

On the need of to fulfill our wishes by our sited counterpart we should have the sited partner is not according to me is the right opinion. Are we searching for a life partner or a slave? Which will fulfill our wish? [The target which was not completed by us to be completed by our partner].

Getting married is the process of providing mantel, emotional, psychological physical confer to each other. If this process is just one sided the institution of marriage cannot stand irrespective of the type of couple you are.



To make any decision, you are the best judge of your own. No societal norm or social practices can bring you the right decision. If a blind divorces blind then the society will allege that that how 2 disables can live together, if divorce happens between blind and sited it may be called that how one can adjust with blind or if sited divorces sited, it will be considered as normal. So never judge your decision on others comments. Don't you remember the story of donkey and and man?

All the openions mentioned above are my personal views.

zoher kheriwala taheri menswear mumbai. skype id zoher.kheriwala
----- Original Message ----- From: "avinash shahi" <shahi88avin...@gmail.com>
To: <accessindia@accessindia.org.in>
Sent: Tuesday, February 26, 2013 11:20 AM
Subject: Re: [AI] PARAVOOR:Mass wedding held for visually challenged


Differences are warmly welcome.
But How one can categorically claim that disabled partners face more
difficulties than blind/sighted partners?
I don't think so. in this case, we should rely on the experiences of
blind partners.
And this utteration varies widely. it depends on the factor that how
tough and resolute you are , and living life lively.
Though I'm still unmarried and unlikely   to get married too soon..
but many of my married blind friends do emphases on mutual mental
satisfaction as more desired satisfaction than merely physical
comforts.
And I share the same feeling to a significant extent.

I believe in the preservation of heterogenous identity.
and why can't we celebrate our unique and distinct behavioural
expression. why we seek affairmation from so called mainstream agents?
If tribal people eat in their own distinct way without spoon, if
north-east Indians people have their own unique culture, then why
can't we cherish their distinct mores?
If my way of hugging is different from sighted people so what? should
I adhere myself to their normes?
na na na.
My comfort is more comfortable than unwilling surrender to certain normes.

And Himanshu sir, I think let the mainstream people remain in their
own made standards. We'll find our way one day..
but no imposition, and bashing please?...
On 2/26/13, Asudani, Rajesh <rajeshasud...@rbi.org.in> wrote:
Firstly, I am not comforted by the thought that mainstream is a myth.
Secondly, marrying a disabled or not, is surely a personal choice but
disabled couples surely face much more hurdles and as a rule, are not
well-included in the mainstream of the society.


-----Original Message-----
From: AccessIndia [mailto:accessindia-boun...@accessindia.org.in] On Behalf
Of avinash shahi
Sent: Monday, February 25, 2013 7:10 PM
To: accessindia@accessindia.org.in
Subject: Re: [AI] PARAVOOR:Mass wedding held for visually challenged

I'm glad to read conflicting claims with regard to 'Mass Marriage Melange'.

and thought to join in this vibrant discussion and deliberation.

Facilitating mass marriages of visually challenged has become an
entrepreneurial come social-service self-satisfying practice these
days.
in fact in many parts of the country, specially in mega metros and
mini metros, scores of marriages are arranged, and solemnized.
This growing phenomena raises many questions.
1. Is getting married to a non-disabled really take you in the domain
of 'mainstream'?
When Actor seeks actress for marriage, player looks player for
marriage, poet desires  poetess for marriage, then why can't blind man
marry to a blind woman?

Now question begs attention, who defines mainstream?
and is marrying to a non-disabled is enough to be called in the mainstream?
I don't think so.
Choice of marriage is purely subjective. and if so called mainstream
occupants are morally bbound to accomodate marginalized, hence
marginalised have an ethical duty towards their fellow beings
irrespective of jender.
Marriage is not a constitutional right which one can expect from so
called mainstream people to accomodate the rest from  the periphery.
Marriage entails: mutual respect, equal concerns, and and love along
with sacrifice.
And mainstream is a myth, which celebrates untouchability, cheers
masculinity, and despises disability.

Now will leave with two more questions Which need further
contemplation, but I'm not in a position to take any view; hope many
people here will put some light on these questions.
1. Why NGOs Which are traditionally supposed to facilitate educational
and employable empowerment of visually challenged has picked  up new
attractive dimention in  their spheres to organize marriage of
visually challenged?
2. And why adult blind people flock in huge numbers to seek spouse via
these NGOs?

On 2/25/13, Asudani, Rajesh <rajeshasud...@rbi.org.in> wrote:
I am compelled to congratulate Himanshu for his scientific approach..


-----Original Message-----
From: AccessIndia [mailto:accessindia-boun...@accessindia.org.in] On
Behalf
Of Himanshu Sahu
Sent: Monday, February 25, 2013 2:20 PM
To: accessindia@accessindia.org.in
Subject: Re: [AI] PARAVOOR:Mass wedding held for visually challenged

Hello,
Let me be very specific with the topic,

1.      It does not make any difference to me that which organization
organized the mass wedding or what they have done earlier in this
respect. This may be of liking to those who are involved in it or
benefitted through it and publicizing it. Further I do not deny the
necessity of such mass marriages and appreciate the initiative. But
still my simple question remains unanswered that "how it brings VIs
into mainstream"?
2. Well, knowing me personally is not going to solve your confusion,
but for the sake of correcting your hypothesis I am compelled to
inform you that I lost eyesight 10 years back and have been the member
of list for last 4 years. And I too know many of VI couples friends.
But here as well, as earlier, I am not able to understand that being
new or old member of list, and, knowing VI couples or not, is how come
related with the issue of bringing VIs into mainstream?
3.      In answer to your next question, I would only say that marrying
within community or outside community and whether blind couple are
happy or not, is a broad topic and I am not interested to deviate from
the actual topic that is "how it brings VIs into mainstream"?

Friend, in the zeal of getting your project acclaimed aren't you
trying to establish a plain charitable mass marriage as inclusion of
VIs into mainstream? Definitely mass marriage is a part of
rehabilitation but not the inclusion into mainstream. I would have
rather appreciated it if all VIs were married with sighted
counterparts and then one would have called it as an attempt to
bringing VIs into mainstream. Still the sighted world is well-known
and well-established "mainstream" and all of hue and cry made by VI
community has more or less similar theme to get incorporated into this
mainstream as we are kept secluded from it.

For the better clarification of the term "mainstream", please refer to
the below mentioned some of the dictionary meanings of the term:
"To incorporate into the prevailing group"
"Representing the prevalent attitudes and values of a society or groups"
And, "normal", "typical", "conventional" etc.

So, it demonstrates that what we are talking about is not an attempt
of incorporation into mainstream, and if one wishes to deny it have to
innovate or forcefully create a new definition of incorporation into
mainstream! And I extend my best wishes to those who want to do this
novel Endeavour.


On 2/24/13, avinash shahi <shahi88avin...@gmail.com> wrote:
By Express News Service - PARAVOOR
24th February 2013 09:22 AM
Photos
 The mass wedding of visually challenged couples, held by the Lioness
Board, the women's wing of the Lion's Club of District 318 C, at
Paravoor, on Saturday. As part of bringing physically handicapped
people into the mainstream, Lioness Board, the women's wing of the
Lion's Club, of  District 318 C, held a mass wedding that saw 18
visually challenged couples taking marital vows at Paravoor on
Saturday.
http://newindianexpress.com/states/kerala/article1476830.ece
'Porutham 2013', held at Paravoor Vyapara Bhavan, was inaugurated by
Lions Club district governor Abraham Panjikkaran. Union Minister for
Food and Civil Supplies K V Thomas was the chief guest at the
function.

While delivering the keynote address, Thomas said that the mass
wedding would be a model for the nation, and the event was an occasion
to learn how a society could be responsible.

The couples were presented with 2.5 sovereigns of gold ornaments each
and `15,000 in cash.

The money was distributed by municipal chairperson Valsala
Prasannakumar and actor  Mythili. Aluva Rural SP Satish Bino
distributed financial aid for enabling self-employment for the
visually challenged couples.

From 102 clubs under District 318 C, dresses and household utensils,
including pressure cookers, were given as gifts to the newly-weds.
Club president Indira Bai Prasad, secretary Susheela Varghese, Prof
Monamma Kokkad, chief co-ordinator A Rajan, Human Rights Commission
chairman Justice Benjamin Koshy offered felicitations.

Out of the 205 applicants, 18 couples were selected. The club would
conduct a mass wedding for 50 couples in 2014, said Indira Bai Prasad.

--
Avinash Shahi
MPhil Research Scholar
Centre for the Study of Law and Governance
Jawaharlal Nehru University
New Delhi India

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--
Thanks and regards
                   Himanshu Sahu
Reach: 09051055000
Skype: himanshu.cute4u

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