Dear Dr Nutan, I got this forward from Mr Kishore. First of all, I don't agree with the views of your friend that molestation cannot happen without the willing consent of the woman. Having said that, I also totally disagree with you when you use derogatory words against menfolk saying that they have poor mental outlook. It is the same mental outlook at makes men protect and provide women. It is the same poor mental outlook that makes guys support women during a fight between a man and a woman. It is the same poor mental outlook that makes men sympathise with women more than men. You spoke about the 21st centruy women. How many of the 21st century women are ready and willing to protect and provide men? How many of the 21st century women are ready to marry unemployed men and support them? I can challenge you that the number is insignificant in a country of 120 crores. If we men start cribbing and listing out the gender discrimination that we are facing, you will be stunned! Just that we don't crib like you do. We men are treated as ATM machines, money-making machines and free security guards of society. Should there be a war, a natural calamity, disaster etc., it is we men who have to make the supreme sacrifice. Remember, in the titanic disaster, it is the women who were first rescued. 94% of all unnatural deaths in the world due to work, profession, wars and disasters are of men and not women. Punishment for the same crime is less for women. The list goes on..........
My point is that society seems to believe that women alone are the discriminated gender. You say that you are a gender rights activist. Why fight only for women? Fight for men's rights too! Afterall, there is deep-rooted antipathy and prejudice against men too. Men are considered the disposable gender. The problems of men is brushed under the carpet. Men have no rights. There is no concept of men's rights. The pain of a man is a joke for the society. (remember the way society laughs at a husband who is ill-treated by his wife). Yeah, this is the same 21st century attitude of society towards men. The same set of people who talk about Equality laugh at men who are ill-treated by women. Is this fair? Awaiting an early reply, Regards, Rohan www.savefamily.org www.saveindianfamily.org www.mynation.net www.498a.org --- On Fri, 25/6/10, giri kishore <[email protected]> wrote: From: giri kishore <[email protected]> Subject: Re: [bm] Molestation To: [email protected] Date: Friday, 25 June, 2010, 10:53 AM From: giri kishore <girikishore@ yahoo.com> To: bharatudaymission@ yahoogroups. com Sent: Thu, June 17, 2010 11:56:24 AM Subject: Re: [bm] Molestation From: Nutan Thakur <nutanthakurlko@ yahoo.in> To: bharatudaymission@ yahoogroups. com Sent: Sun, June 6, 2010 9:24:14 AM Subject: [bm] Molestation Friends, I present a live case before u. It started with my putting forth a small statement- ""A Lt General accused of molesting a Colonel's wife is thrown out of Army. Ye kya ho raha hai?" on the social networking site Facebook. To this there were different answers but the one that really stunned me was from a friend w...hose view was that- " No man can molest a woman , and that too a married woman of force ... NEVER , without her willing consent". He also says that - "I have always observed ... that this type of stupid behaviour is common in love affairs". It is this statement by an otherwise learned and sober person that I want to present before you all for discussion and opinion making. To me the person who made the statement is not important, nor is my idea to criticize him or to dissect his background. To me what really matters is the fact that even today, in the 21st Century, there is a male perception that goes on to say that molestation of a woman (particularly a married woman) is not possible (without her consent). If slightly extended this statement comes to mean that molestation, rape and such other lurid and heinous crimes against women are simply not possible as long as the women are not a party to it. Frankly I not only completely disagree with this statement but also find it absolutely sickening. And also terrifying. Terrifying because it is this kind of male mind-set that is responsible for many heinous and dangerous crimes against women go completely unheard and unpunished. What this gentleman is saying might as well be the mental thought process of the Judge or the Magistrate who has been given the responsibility of delivering Justice. And if the person has already made a presumption that there can't be a crime of this nature against a woman (more so in the case of married women), then one can understand what kind of justice is the woman going to get from the concerned court. We have seen the dramatic version of these situations in the celebrated film "Damini" where "Taarikh pe taarikh" could not give justice to the raped woman till the very end. We also know of such widely discussed cases on rape like the Mathura rape case and Bhanwari Devi case where victim had to pass through such insulting times even in the law courts that it led to great revolt and resistance by the women activists from all over India. But it seems that no change of law and regulations on Rape has been able to actually change the deep-rooted antipathy of this kind of people for whom women are nothing more than a plaything. If what these people say is true then what is the need of any law on Rape? Why have different sections on women abuse and molestation? I am not commenting at all on the case related with the Lt Genera in the Army where he lost his job due to the allegations made by a Colonel's wife. Each case is different and must be treated so. I also don't say that women don't feign wrong abuse. In my husband Amitabh ji's policing career, I have myself come across such cases where it was clear that the woman is making false accusations. I remember a case in Gagaha police station in Gorakhpur, when my husband was very new in the service and after a raid that he had conducted, the woman whom they had arrested with weapons had made written accusations of rape against 10-12 police officers, except luckily my husband. The matter got exposed within a day or two but it had given my husband a lot of mental harassment. But then to sweepingly generalize such a statement is really too much. In my opinion it shows the poor mental outlook and extremely biased world view of many of the male folk. It also gives the reason why still justice is being denied to one half of the human population in such a large measure. I as a social activist and a gender-rights activist not only strongly condemn such wrongly-placed mental outlook but also consider them extremely dangerous for the proper development and functioning of human society in a just manner. I know that such a statement by an individual is not really important, what actually counts is the overall gender perception. And this statement somehow seems to represent the same distorted gender perception Dr Nutan Thakur, Secretary, IRDS, Lucknow # 94155-34525 Nutan ji, the remark you have qouted is obnoxious. What about the minor girls who do not understand what sex is? Does he wants to say that those poor girls are also part of this hinoius activity. I consider it to be abnormality which has become rampant in last few years. It has to be tackled not only on Govt. level but also socially.I perfectly agree in some cases it may be true when it is man managed. I am happy you have raised this issue. If you wish you may write a detailed Art in Hindi for a Journal AKAR which I edit from Kanpur. giving all aspects of this malady. Thanks. Dr. Giriraj Kishore 11/3210 Souterganj Kanpur 1 I agree and respect your view in general but language needs to be convincing. Thanks. I am for all that what you have written but in my own way. No one has a right to molest any body e ven through words even, It comes under Hinsa.
