Dear Friends
Of late I have come to understand that I have a manipulative
side to my nature. Having thought out carefully what I want in my life I
am able to set an array of actions in play designed to ensure that, with
time, I get what I want. This manipulativeness has come out in search of
goals I am comfortable with having and some which I am not.
The manipulativeness particularly has come into play as a side of child
rearing.
I love reading books and find reading a good book or story to be one of
the greatest joys of my life. When David was born I decided that I
wanted David to be a "reader". Encouraging children to be readers in
today's media driven world is a daunting task. However like so many
things I do, I went about it wish a passion. My mani-ulativeness came
into full play on this particular task.
When David was one year old, the TV went out the front door and never
returned. I filled my home with good books and began reading first to
David, and then Joshua from infancy. Both boys grew up hearing
wonderful stories, stories from books.
When he was about 8, I made David read to me every day for almost two
years before I became comfortably convinced that he had the reading skills
required. When life was quiet around the house and one or the other
boys came to me saying, "I'm bored, there's nothing to do" I often chose
to tell them : "Learning how to amuse yourself is one of the greatest
skills you can develop in life". This was not what they wanted to hear
at the time but getting no excessive external stimulation from me they
were thrown back onto on their own devices.
One day, when he was 10 that I found David, alone in his room, reading
one of his favourites among the books I'd read him. A wave of relief and
self-satisfaction overcame me. Being a reader whatever he wants to know
in his future life will potentially be available to him. "One child down
and one to go" I said to myself. Joshua growing up with a brother and father
who read for pleasure soon
developed the skills required.
Today, we are in the second of three weeks of the winter school break.
We have visited friends, we have gone to the movies, swimming at the
aquatic centre, we've watched DVD's (one per week) and logged on to the
internet and played games (one hour per day max). And, of course, the
boys found large periods of the day when there was apparently nothing to
do. Three days ago, David retreated to his room and began to reread one
of his books. Joshua, deprived of his older brother, roamed around the
house and garden playing with his imaginary games. But this too began to
pale for him.
So, he picked volume 1 of the Harry Potter series off the shelf and
began to read it. Two and a half days have gone by and he has read 112
pages. He laughs out loud at the funny bits, frowns as parts and asks me
the handful of word he can't figure out. I've had him read a page to me
and asked him what he had read. He's getting it.
"I'm proud to have read 60 pages in one day" he said to me the first day.
And I'm proud of him too. And proud of myself for the
work I have put in over the past 13 years to bring them both to this
point.
Yesterday was cold, their friends were otherwise engaged and the house was
quiet. All three of us were reading. I tip toed around and took a few
photo's of my sons...reading.
Cheers,
Martin Wolterding
Papa Seahorse
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