There will be no nursing home in my future...

When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship. The average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day! I have checked on reservations at Princess and I can get a long-term discount and senior discount price of $135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:

  • Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
  • I will have as many as 10 meals a day, if I can waddle to the restaurant, or I can have room service (which means I can have breakfast in bed every day of the week).
  • Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free washers and dryers, and shows every night of the week.
  • They have free toothpaste, razors and free soap and shampoo.
  • They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.
  • I will get to meet new people every seven or fourteen days.
  • T.V. broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattress replaced? No Problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your inconvenience.
  • Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even have to ask for them.
  • If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are Medicare. If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.
Now hold on for the best!
  • Do you want to see South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia or name where you want to go? Princess will have a ship ready to go.
So, don't look for me in a nursing home, just call shore to ship.

P.S. And don't forget, when you die, the just dump you over the side at no charge! :o)


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