OK. Let me go on now :-) Please, see below: > 2007/1/28, Clandy <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>: > > And we should take more activities to preserve it. Because all > > international music originated from traditional music.
Syntax: ...to preserve it, because... (or other alternatives with "since," "as," etc.) > > Jazz's origin Style: Try to avoid two related words in a single paragraph (origin, originate). Also, I suppose "The origin of Jazz" could be better. If you use "origin", use "developed" isntead of "originated", or something else. > > is traditional African music, and the famous music style Flamenco is > > mixed by traditional Indian music and old-time Spanish music. Grammar: "...is a mix of......and/with...." > > > > In conculsion, Spelling: "conclusion" > > music is an important part of human life, Logic: You haven't given enough evidence though. ;-) > > and among > > different music types, Logic: "types" is too vague a term. What about "genres" or "styles", for instance? > > we should take more activities to preserve > > traditional music. Style: You seem to have only copied a sentence that is used just a few lines before. Try to reformulate it somehow. That's all I can contribute. I hope it will help you. Best wishes, Petr --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Correct my English" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected] To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] For more options, visit this group at http://groups-beta.google.com/group/correct-my-english -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
