-Caveat Lector-
I was curious to see what Ann Coulter would have to say as she was
good friends with Barbara Olson. Her comment at the end concerning
the approach to Germany is very interesting.
~Amelia~
Ann Coulter (archive)
(printer-friendly version)
September 14, 2001
This is war
Barbara Olson kept her cool. In the hysteria and terror of
hijackers herding passengers to the rear of the plane, she
retrieved her cell phone and called her husband, Ted, the solicitor
general of the United States. She informed him that he had better
call the FBI -- the plane had been hijacked. According to reports,
Barbara was still on the phone with Ted when her plane plunged in a
fiery explosion directly into the Pentagon.
Barbara risked having her neck slit to warn the country of a
terrorist attack. She was a patriot to the very end.
This is not to engage in the media's typical hallucinatory
overstatement about anyone who is the victim of a horrible tragedy.
The furtive cell phone call was an act of incredible daring and
panache. If it were not, we'd be hearing reports of a hundred more
cell phone calls. (Even people who swear to hate cell phones carry
them for commercial air travel.)
The last time I saw Barbara in person was about three weeks ago.
She generously praised one of my recent columns and told me I had
really found my niche. Ted, she said, had taken to reading my
columns aloud to her over breakfast.
I mention that to say three things about Barbara. First, she was
really nice. A lot of people on TV seem nice, but aren't. (And some
who don't seem nice, are.) But Barbara was always her charming,
graceful, ebullient self. "Nice" is an amazingly rare quality among
writers. In the opinion business, bitter, jealous hatred is the
norm. Barbara had reason to be secure.
Second, it was actually easy to imagine Ted reading political
columns aloud to Barbara at the breakfast table. Theirs was a
relationship that could only be cheaply imitated by Bill and
Hillary -- the latter being a subject of Barbara's appropriately
biting best seller, "Hell to Pay."
Hillary claimed preposterously in the Talk magazine interview that
she discussed policy with Bill while cutting his grapefruit in the
morning. Ted and Barbara really did talk politics -- and really did
have breakfast together.
It's "Ted and Barbara" just like it's Fred and Ginger, and George
and Gracie. They were so perfect together, so obvious, that their
friends were as happy they were on their wedding day. This is more
than the death of a great person and patriotic American. It's a
human amputation.
Third, since Barbara's compliment, I've been writing my columns for
Ted and Barbara. I'm always writing to someone in my head. Now I
don't know who to write to. Ted and Barbara were a good muse.
Apart from hearing that this beautiful light has been extinguished
from the world, only one other news flash broke beyond the
numbingly omnipresent horror of the entire day. That evening, CNN
reported that bombs were dropping in Afghanistan -- and then
updated the report to say they weren't our bombs.
They should have been ours. I want them to be ours.
This is no time to be precious about locating the exact individuals
directly involved in this particular terrorist attack. Those
responsible include anyone anywhere in the world who smiled in
response to the annihilation of patriots like Barbara Olson.
We don't need long investigations of the forensic evidence to
determine with scientific accuracy the person or persons who
ordered this specific attack. We don't need an "international
coalition." We don't need a study on "terrorism." We certainly
didn't need a congressional resolution condemning the attack this
week.
The nation has been invaded by a fanatical, murderous cult. And we
welcome them. We are so good and so pure we would never engage in
discriminatory racial or "religious" profiling.
People who want our country destroyed live here, work for our
airlines, and are submitted to the exact same airport shakedown as
a lumberman from Idaho. This would be like having the Wehrmacht
immigrate to America and work for our airlines during World War II.
Except the Wehrmacht was not so bloodthirsty.
"All of our lives" don't need to change, as they keep prattling on
TV. Every single time there is a terrorist attack -- or a plane
crashes because of pilot error -- Americans allow their rights to
be contracted for no purpose whatsoever.
The airport kabuki theater of magnetometers, asinine questions
about whether passengers "packed their own bags," and the hostile,
lumpen mesomorphs ripping open our luggage somehow allowed over a
dozen armed hijackers to board four American planes almost
simultaneously on Bloody Tuesday. (Did those fabulous security
procedures stop a single hijacker anyplace in America that day?)
Airports scrupulously apply the same laughably ineffective airport
harassment to Suzy Chapstick as to Muslim hijackers. It is
preposterous to assume every passenger is a potential crazed
homicidal maniac. We know who the homicidal maniacs are. They are
the ones cheering and dancing right now.
We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert
them to Christianity. We weren't punctilious about locating and
punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German
cities; we killed civilians. That's war. And this is war.
Contact Ann Coulter
©2001 Universal Press Syndicate
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