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A Daily Joke - August 10th, 2000!
http://www.adailyjoke.com
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~~~Quote of the day~~~
"About the time we can make ends meet, somebody
moves the ends."
-- Herbert Hoover
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The BIONIC MAN busts a nut!
http://www.dailymegajoke.com/pass/bionic.html
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Talk about toilet humor:
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Today's Jokes:
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1. Funeral for a friend
2. Once is never enough
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1.Funeral for a friend
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Little Tim was in the garden filling a hole when his neighbor
peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced
youngster was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to
there, Tim?"
"My goldfish died," replied Tim tearfully, without looking up,
"and I've just buried him."
The neighbor said, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish,
isn't it Tim?"
Tim patted down the last heap of earth, and then replied,
"That's because he's still inside your stupid cat."
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Here is today's DAILY HUMOR LINK:
(See the entire collection at: http://www.dailymegajoke.com/pass.html)
The evolution of man has led to this...
http://www.dailymegajoke.com/pass/evolution.html
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2. ONCE IS NEVER ENOUGH
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A farmer wanted to have his hens serviced, so he went to the
market looking for a rooster. He was hoping he could get a
special rooster - one that could service all of his many hens
and when he told this to the market vendor, the vendor
replied: "I have just the rooster for you. Randy here is the
horniest rooster you will ever see!"
So the farmer took Randy back to the farm. Before setting him
loose in the henhouse though, he gave Randy a little pep talk.
"Randy", he said, "I'm counting on you to do your stuff." And
without a word, he strutted into the henhouse.
Randy was as fast as he was furious, mounting each hen like a
thunderbolt. There was much squawking and many feathers flying,
till Randy had finished having his way with each hen.
But Randy didn't stop there; he went in to the barn and mounted
all the horses, one by one and still at the same frantic pace.
Then he went to the pigpen, where he did the same. The farmer,
watching all of this with disbelief, cried out "Stop, Randy,
you'll kill yourself!" But Randy continued, seeking out each
farm animal in the same manner.
Well the next morning, the farmer looked out and saw Randy
lying there on his lawn. His legs were up in the air, his eyes rolled
back, and his long tongue hanging out. A buzzard was already
circling above Randy.
The farmer walked up to Randy saying "Oh you poor thing, look
what you did, you've gone and killed yourself. I warned you,
little buddy."
"Shhhhh," Randy whispered, "The buzzard's getting closer"
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