Hi,

Le 28/02/2012 20:55, Nigel Barker a écrit :
> I fixed the English of the www welcome page.

Thanks for your proposals.

> I did it using the pot
> file used for translations. I hope that was the right thing to do.

Not really: tho PO files are always generated from the source files
(index.html.en here).

> I'm attaching it here.

Attached the actual patch against the source file with your proposals (I
already fixed a s/do/doesn't/ you spotted, thanks for that, directly in
the source and took care of the trivial unfuzzy), after re-wrapping the
generated file to minimize the diff.

Please note that, even if I can't judge of the quality of your
proposals, I would prefer *not* to commit them as is.

A few remarks after a quick glance:

> -      <h2 class="menu">Local services</h2>
> +      <h2 class="menu">Local Services</h2>

I'm not fond of uppercase everywhere, is there a rationale for that change?

> -    Debian Edu server was successful. Congratulations, and welcome. To change
> +    Debian Edu server was successful. Congratulations, and welcome! To change

I'm not fond of exclamation marks either, is there a rationale for that
change?

> -    On the right side for this page you see some links that can be helpful 
> for you in your
> -    work, administrating a Debian Edu network.
> +    On the right side of the page are some links to assist in the 
> adminstration
> +    of your Debian Edu network.

Your patch needs proofread (“adminstration”), and I'm not fond of the
personal point of view (“your network”, while it should actually be the
school's network).

Your patch is IMHO a good start to improve this welcome page, and since
it's always displayed during the first start, it would be nice to give
it all the love it needs. On the other hand, the release is pretty soon,
and it would be a shame to break any of the ten translations that are
complete right now. So, I propose to ask for a quick review on the
debian-l10n-english list, that must be finished for the next weekend,
and then send a short translation call (~5 days), hoping all translators
will be able to make it before the following weekend.

Unless someone objects, I'll send tomorrow the request for review,
keeping this list CC.

Regards

David

Index: index.html.en
===================================================================
--- index.html.en       (révision 76808)
+++ index.html.en       (copie de travail)
@@ -3,7 +3,7 @@
 
 <html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"; lang="en">
   <head>
-    <title>Welcome to &laquo;www&raquo;: Info page for a Debian Edu 
installation</title>
+    <title>Welcome to &laquo;www&raquo;: Debian Edu administration 
information</title>
     <link rev="made" href="mailto:[email protected]"/>
     <link rel="top" href="http://wiki.debian.org/DebianEdu"/>
     <link rel="alternate" title="Norsk" href="index.html.nb"/>
@@ -29,7 +29,7 @@
 
     <div class="menu">
 
-      <h2 class="menu">Local services</h2>
+      <h2 class="menu">Local Services</h2>
      <ul>
       <li><a href="/debian-edu-doc/en/">Documentation</a></li>
       <li><a href="https://www/gosa/";>GOsa<sup>2</sup> LDAP 
administration</a></li>
@@ -45,7 +45,7 @@
       <li><a href="http://www.skolelinux.org/";>Web page</a></li>
       <li><a href="http://wiki.debian.org/DebianEdu";>Wiki page</a></li>
       <li><a href="http://wiki.debian.org/DebianEdu/MailingLists";>Email 
lists</a></li>
-      <li><a href="http://popcon.skolelinux.org/";>Collected package 
usage</a></li>
+      <li><a href="http://popcon.skolelinux.org/";>Package usage 
statistics</a></li>
       <li><a href="http://linuxsignpost.org/";>The Linux Signpost</a></li>
       <li><a 
href="http://www.linuxiskolen.no/slxdebianlabs/donations.html";>Donate to the 
project</a></li>
      </ul>
@@ -55,6 +55,7 @@
     <div class="body">
 
     <div align="left">
+
 <!-- Note to translators: these strings should not be translated -->
       <a href="index.html.ca">[Català]</a>
       <a href="index.html.de">[Deutsch]</a>
@@ -74,39 +75,39 @@
 
     <h2>Welcome to Debian Edu / Skolelinux</h2>
     <p><strong>If you can see this, it means the installation of your 
-    Debian Edu server was successful. Congratulations, and welcome. To change
+    Debian Edu server was successful. Congratulations, and welcome! To change
     the content of this page, edit
     /etc/debian-edu/www/index.html.en, in your favorite editor.</strong></p>
     <p>
-    On the right side for this page you see some links that can be helpful for 
you in your
-    work, administrating a Debian Edu network.
+    On the right side of the page are some links to assist in the adminstration
+    of your Debian Edu network.
     </p>
     <ul>
-     <li>The links under Local services are links to services running on this 
server.
-     These tools can assist you in your daily work with the Debian Edu 
solution.
+     <li>The links under Local Services are links to services running on this 
server.
+     These tools can assist in the daily administration of the Debian Edu 
network.
     </li>
-     <li>The links under Debian Edu are links to the Debian Edu and/or 
Skolelinux pages on the Internet.
+     <li>The links under Debian Edu are links to Debian Edu and/or Skolelinux 
pages on the Internet.
      <ul>
-      <li><strong>Documentation:</strong> Choose this to browse the installed 
documentation</li>
-      <li><strong>GOsa<sup>2</sup> LDAP administration:</strong> Choose this 
to get to the GOsa<sup>2</sup> LDAP administration web system.  Use this to add 
and edit users and machines.</li>
-      <li><strong>Printer administration:</strong> Choose this to administer 
your printers.</li>
-      <li><strong>Backup:</strong> Choose this to get to the backup system, 
here you can restore or change the nightly backup</li>
-      <li><strong>Nagios:</strong> Choose this to get to the Nagios system 
monitor pages.  The predefined user name is &laquo;nagiosadmin&raquo; and if 
you want to change the predefined password (as root) you can run 
&laquo;htpasswd /etc/nagios3/htpasswd.users nagiosadmin&raquo;.</li>
-      <li><strong>Munin:</strong> Choose this to get to the Munin statistic 
pages.</li>
-      <li><strong>Sitesummary:</strong> Choose this to get to the summary 
report of Debian Edu network machines.</li> 
+      <li><strong>Documentation:</strong> Select this to browse the installed 
documentation.</li>
+      <li><strong>GOsa<sup>2</sup> LDAP administration:</strong> Select this 
for the GOsa<sup>2</sup> LDAP administration pages, where you can add and edit 
users and machines.</li>
+      <li><strong>Printer administration:</strong> Select this to administer 
printers on your network.</li>
+      <li><strong>Backup:</strong> Select this for the backup system, where 
you can restore or change the nightly backup.</li>
+      <li><strong>Nagios:</strong> Select this to go to the Nagios system 
monitor pages.  The default user name is &laquo;nagiosadmin&raquo; and you can 
set the password by running (as root)  &laquo;htpasswd 
/etc/nagios3/htpasswd.users nagiosadmin&raquo;.</li>
+      <li><strong>Munin:</strong> Select this to get to the Munin statistics 
pages.</li>
+      <li><strong>Sitesummary:</strong> Select this to see the summary report 
of machines on the Debian Edu network.</li> 
      </ul>
      </li>
     </ul>
-    <h2>Personal web pages for the users on the system.</h2>
-    <p>All users on the system, can create a catalog on their home directory 
with the name 
-    &laquo;public_html&raquo;. Here the users can add their own home pages. 
The home pages
-    will be available at the address http://www/~username/. If you have a user 
named
+    <h2>Personal web pages for users on the system.</h2>
+    <p>All users on the system can create a &laquo;public_html&raquo; folder in
+    their home directory. Here the users can create their own home pages, which
+    will be visible at the address http://www/~username/. If you have a user 
named
     Jon Doe, with the user name jond, his web pages will be available at 
     <a href="http://www/~jond/";>http://www/~jond/</a>. If the user doesn't 
-    exist, or the catalog public_html do not exist, you will get the 
&laquo;Not Found&raquo; 
-    error page. If the public_html catalog exists, but it is empty, you will 
get the 
-    &laquo;Permission Denied&raquo; error page. To change this, create the 
index.html file inside
-    the public_html catalog.</p>
+    exist, or hasn't created a public_html folder, you will get the &laquo;Not 
Found&raquo; 
+    error page. If the public_html folder exists, but is empty, you will get 
the 
+    &laquo;Permission Denied&raquo; error page. To prevent this, create an 
index.html file inside
+    the public_html folder.</p>
 
     </div>
   </body>

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