As I was working some rough draft on the doc, i did start to play around with this, even did a little test recording to prep the video.
As almost always, the constant and ridiculous and sometimes scary and then often back with a vengeance to make scary look like possible insanity, de ja vu was rolling in and out. David hit a repeat beat or two not too long ago that made me think maybes he’s been tripping with me in whatever timelines and lives we were crossing. I’ve somewhat gotten used to it, but it was feeling more questionable. Did i really discover and follow the same critical beats before in a much much much shorter timeframe? And do it in a way that no matter how long and far I went and was sure I had essentially caught up or long passed past Mark, I had been further on the critical path before? At every discovery and leap forward? Always? Was my mind playing tricks? Some deja vu had to be involved right? Sure, I had chased the speed and scale is the light gods less aggressively, more broad test and feature focused, less divergence, more testing, more agreeable to others views of the “correct” path, but I was still finding all this great stuff that I was excited to find before right? More and better all the time? Enough that I couldn’t sell to others without making that my job instead. This is what I had ear marked to come back and get right? But a bit more and further and more complete? Like I must just be imagining that whatever I did and found, that past Rabbit Mark appeared and had done 3 laps around me and laughed before I even saw him? I mean I know I had sand bagged everything I said before heavily, always - lol and still got shot out of the sky each time, I do laugh at that, I love it, but we are talking thousands of hours, surprises and gains to myself beyond what I remembered even with heavy sandbags, and then repeating that feeling again and some more. And now I was wrapping some stress testing with Ishan and Noble and starting to do some doc. And my body and mind was giving out at times. And my poor wife and my friend wondering if I’d ever return despite any threat or consequence. And the tests were looking super solid and the other more real world testing was going better and better and I was starting and preparing a doc phase. And this was all too familiar too. I mean get off it. Was I repeating this life, could I not tell between now and then? And then after working out some issues on the stress test the code starts to open up - again familiar- it becomes clear what the cleanup to is and I’m just doing it. But it creates some good churn and behavior changes and I can’t keep up with all of it the way I do, some parts have to move forward and then I go back and pull the rest. And then I hear some reports that are all too familiar. Hey Mark, didn’t you say you were close? I was trying some basic stuff and saw this and this? And then I’m like, ok, I don’t if it’s 2017 or 2024, but surly I’m stuck in a loop. But I’ll just say what I know I’ve said every time. Step back for a second - I’ll address whatever happened or is happening, I need to deal with what’s in front of me, don’t waste your time, it will take me a moment when I get it it. There is plenty that becomes apparent and was waiting for me on crunches at the end. Which I hate saying because it feels like groundhogs day. But I know it’s true so I say it. And shortly after I go and look. And that basically leads me to the point that last time caused me to race to a ridiculous divergence in the final seconds of the quarter - letting shit that was doing well fall and crumble to the wayside, because it had no importance when I spotted real daylight and had little time to explore it, and non daylight had no value in the shine of the light. The light is all the matters amount darkness. So then I had to rescue my personal life and health from myself and dragon chasing, and long and tired sleeping when it was my turn for other humans, and a rush for just one last good chase. And so I did the best attempt I could muster at cold turkey. Live to fight another day. So I dumped that state and a about a billion random micro thoughts and rocks and as I expected as I was doing it, it all meant pretty little to anyone else. Not hard to imagine, when after a short time away, it meant very little to me. Hell, I didn’t even look at that branch again myself. I restarted from 0 and just out in my Grand Canyon mule blinders. Anyway, I’m back staring at the peak of the Everest, having remembered I might have climbed 75% of Annapurna and with others thinking I might have weekended on Mount Mansfield. And in the same position as I was previously, but with more time and backing and possibility in tossing down some maps and ropes. Now last time, lacking most of that, I just ripped and pulled and chucked stuff down as raced down and back to a semblance of normality and health. And basically, some climbers took my vest and pulled out my backpack instead put on it and then a helmet and rock, precariously stepped on it all and looked around in a bit of confusion and then wandered off. So don’t call me optimistic that, even when I’m not fleeing the mountain like the heavy air is choking me, that I can help a single person climb higher than about the height of a helmet and a back pack. Not when most people can walk of the to hill nearby and look down at the refuse and kind of pause and wonder and scratch their heads. None the less, for a brief time I’ll be a paid ranger at the mountain. So if anyone wants to look at a bit of climbing, the gift shop will point you my way and I’m setting up a little course and pamphlets. It’s likely to go something like, I’ll tell you that first I’m sharpening some ice skates and then it will get awkward until you start slinking off to the trail heads yourself - but hey, Ranger Smith didn’t need Yogi’s alignment on park antics to be a gainful Ranger. And neither did Yogi need Ranger Smith. I think. Maybe they did need each other in some “deep” way. It’s hard to remember. On Sat, Mar 20, 2021 at 10:37 PM Mark Miller <markrmil...@gmail.com> wrote: > So for a bit, I'll be working on comments and documentation that will > be much more useful to anyone looking for use. That will be the meat > and potatoes and the real deal. This is just a bit of my personal time > on a Saturday. > > So, yeah, the real deal doc and info coming... > > But in the meantime, part 1 of 2, > The-Solr-Ref-Branch-Poor-Mans-Cliff-Notes-Part_1_of_2.m4v > > Part 2 following shortly this weekend, and then say hello to Mark the > novelist, the documentation writer, the comment spinner. If 1000 > monkeys could do Shakespeare ... > > > https://www.dropbox.com/s/z9d7o68hj4w2fri/The-Solr-Ref-Branch-Poor-Mans-Cliff-Notes-Part_1_of_2.m4v?dl=0 > > -- > - Mark > -- - Mark http://about.me/markrmiller
