--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "wayback71" <waybac...@...> wrote: <snip> > I also think an important consideration is how the women > he was with felt about it all. If they were willing and > eager and felt ok about, then that goes a long way to > making it ok.
I'd guess most were willing and eager to start with, but with these kinds of relationships it's usually the development and especially the denouement that causes pain, at the time and sometimes for many years afterward. When you're young, you tend not to think too much about how what you see as a big adventure is all going to turn out. For that matter, someone who's been sheltered from normal social relationships with the opposite sex for as long as MMY was isn't likely to think about it either. It's a mug's game to try to figure out how MMY felt about anything, but I'm really curious. From what I've read, it seems the dilly-dallying took place during a specific period--I have the impression it was a decade or less--and then stopped. Your typical philanderer *doesn't* stop. So why did MMY? Conscience? The pragmatic aspects? > The difference in authority and power between MMY and the > women, however, is another issue That's the biggie, IMHO. It really changes the consensuality equation. It would with any powerful man who holds a lot of authority over a younger woman, but *especially* with a supposedly enlightened spiritual teacher and a disciple. One thing I *haven't* encountered, that I can recall-- somebody correct me if I'm wrong--in any of the stories that *is* a feature of many similar stories about other gurus is the promotion by the guru of the idea that having sex with him is going to further the woman's spiritual evolution. (Of course, that's an assumption the women may have adopted on their own.) The sense I get of the overall picture is that MMY was just pathetically *naive* about the whole business. He knew it had to be kept quiet, but other than that, he really didn't know what he was doing, especially emotionally, or have any idea of the possible psychological repercussions, on the women or himself. > (why not a woman saint more his own age?). That would have been tremendously difficult to arrange, given the box he'd put himself in. And it would probably have been even harder to keep quiet than fooling around with selected disciples. > I look forward to reading what Judith has to say about > how she felt about it, how it affected her then and as > the years passed. Me too. But based on her Web site, I have to wonder about conflicts of interest skewing the tale.