Emily, the x-ray vision which possesses me, gives great insight. : ) I love reading your posts. This week was a bit busy for me and when I do get to thoroughly read your posts, you bring a smile to my face. The children are the most important to anything else in the world, even when they are teenage and older. A mommy's "me," time in greatest focus is being there to bring comfort to her children's, "me," time. This, is always a benefit and where nature gives rewards out of.
Hope to see you on tonight, or tomorrow. : ) I think I may be here, unless I get a wild hair up my as_. --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Emily Reyn <emilymae.reyn@...> wrote: > > Yes, when you feel moved, please do...as now that I am moving out of shame I > am moving directly into deep fear. Â I knew it was coming and it isn't the > "how am I going to support my family" kind of fear. Â Funny the topic should > show up here. Â I am very happy that I have more confidence and more energy > and more resolve to deal with the demons, so to speak. Â I will be posting > less to the joy of many, I'm sure. Â My older daughter is here for the month > of January and is making it pretty clear that she needs me to "step it up" > family-wise, and I think she's right. Â My younger teen actually gives me way > more slack. Â > > But, action and a schedule will help allay fear on a daily basis. I also > really want to spend some time with some of the BatGap interviews. I just > spent two days reading Rory Goff's spiritual autobiography. Â I can't > remember what prompted me to look him up, but I'm glad I did. He spent quite > a bit of time in Seattle and may know someone who could help me, so I might > call him. Â > > Yes, Ravi, the car video was a great one...I didn't even notice the ipod was > swinging to the beat, but it is and that was very funny the second time > around. Â I think Obba must have special sight. Â > > > ________________________________ > From: Ravi Chivukula <chivukula.ravi@...> > To: "FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com" <FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com> > Sent: Friday, December 30, 2011 8:31 PM > Subject: Re: [FairfieldLife] Re: whynotnow7 = futur.musik > > > Â > Jim, not sure what the context was for this discussion on fear but yes I have > had my battles with it for the last 2 years and your views are much > appreciated. > > I really appreciated David and yours feedback on the Batgap list last year, > on fear of death being one of the last of the attachments to go and I had > really intense experiences as well which I have shared in the past. Now I can > safely say that I have no more fears left :-), it's such a freedom !!! > > > I can discuss more if you or others are interested. > > > On Dec 30, 2011, at 6:22 PM, "futur.musik" <futur.musik@...> wrote: > > > Â > >Hi Ravi! Sometimes fear teases me, but shows its illusory nature very > >quickly, since I refuse to avert my gaze from it. When I first gained the > >ability to stop thought altogether, I found a practical use for it, that of > >putting myself to sleep at night. > > > >Instead of the past, thoughts running without stopping, now they could be > >stopped, at any time...like...that. However when I began doing it to fall > >asleep, immediately after stopping my thoughts, my heart would involuntarily > >race, in the absence of a point of identification, so ingrained was my habit. > > > >Or perhaps those were the final threads of that attachment to some memory of > >me. Not gluey enough to prevent me from letting go of thought with no > >attempt to get it back, yet still enough memory to trigger my autonomic > >nervous system into a fight or flight response (even though it was > >ultimately afraid of itself-lol).:-) > > > >--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, Ravi Chivukula <chivukula.ravi@> wrote: > >> > >> Beautiful post !! Welcome back Jim !!! > >> > >> > >> On Dec 30, 2011, at 4:05 PM, "futur.musik" <futur.musik@> wrote: > >> > >> > Hi everyone, I am back as futur.musik, a sometimes record label I've > >> > played with in the past. I was whynotnow7, but got tired of it, sounded > >> > stale, so here's the new me. > >> > > >> > Happy New Year almost! Merry Christmas, except to Vajihad, who is in > >> > some white supremacist movie that I am not part of. Welcome back Ravi! > >> > Thank you Bob for Santa's present! Thank you Nabby and Buck on behalf of > >> > the posts you attempted to give whynotnow7! I hope everyone has a great > >> > coming year! > >> > > >> > Emily's observation that people with fixed beliefs (who cannot listen to > >> > others) live a subconscious fear-based existence was right on. I also > >> > enjoyed Ravi's candor earlier. The bhajan in the back of the car was > >> > intense, and some good singing. > >> > > >> > Funny when someone comes straight out with a shot of reality on here, it > >> > cannot be ducked, and yet it is funny watching some here twist > >> > themselves into pretzels trying to avoid it. There have been several > >> > exchanges as of late that have been especially entertaining. Gives new > >> > meaning to the expression you can run, but you cannot hide. > >> > > >> > It seems like some folks here get tweaked a few times and they are off > >> > to the races, slaying straw men as fast as they can stand them up. > >> > Completely lose touch with reality, diving inside their heads for the > >> > most distorted stories of what has occurred. > >> > > >> > As a great example, the person on here with only opinions, who has an > >> > actual *Do*Not*Read*List* lives the very picture of a fear based > >> > existence. This person cannot take enough stock in their own ideas to > >> > discuss them. Calls them mere 'opinions'. So to this person, they can > >> > only be responsible for opinions, which change all the time anyway. > >> > > >> > So, to themselves, there is nothing to believe in, to follow, develop, > >> > explore or take responsibility for. This person's ideas are so unstable > >> > and ephemeral that they can only be referred to as 'opinions', never to > >> > be challenged, examined or validated, even to themselves. > >> > > >> > As time has passed on FairfieldLife, this person has grown increasingly > >> > isolated, now on a forum of over a thousand members, interacting with > >> > just *two* other people, with a special case for discussing a "safe" > >> > subject with one other. > >> > > >> > This person is the only member in the ten year history of FFL with a > >> > specified Do Not Read List. The mere written words on a screen from a > >> > growing list of members are too stressful to even look at for this > >> > person, so they are denied the attention of one "immersed in Self" (the > >> > way this person recently described themselves). > >> > > >> > Well, its a bit more complicated than that...you see, this person > >> > actually *does* read the posts of those on that private DNRL. They > >> > simply pretend otherwise. shhh. > >> > > >> > Is this really what FFL is all about? Seems like the only reason this > >> > person is on here is for some attention. No interest in interacting - > >> > just a soapbox for 'opinions'. I guess it takes all kinds. > >> > > >> > Anyway the point I was making is that we can live like this one person > >> > does, locked up within their 'opinions', posting plenty but (pretending > >> > they are) not reading others, and certainly not interacting with more > >> > than just a couple of trusted buddies. > >> > > >> > Or we can be open and engage others and make this more of a community of > >> > ideas and fun and humor, as it has been lately. FDR and later, Living > >> > Colour, said it best, "The only thing to fear...is fear itself". > >> > > >> > > >> > > > > >
