---In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, <sharelong60@...> wrote:
Ann, I was making reference to some TV shows in which people become drug
dealers to support their family.
But TV shows aren't real life, at least the last time I checked.
Selfish is a strange word. But I agree with you that if people are truly
selfish, then they take good care of themselves. And that benefits others. One
of life's wonderful ironies!
But I didn't say that. I never said to be selfish is to "take good care of
themselves", in fact, in the case of addicts they make all the wrong decisions.
They hurt those who love them, they abandon them emotionally if not physically,
they degrade their bodies, imperil their jobs and the list goes on and on. When
you are an addict nobody benefits, at least in the short term. With luck and a
lot of grace one can emerge stronger, smarter, wiser and so can those who love
the addict but it is a damn hard and long road and that particular journey does
not end with abstinence.
Lots of snow outside. Walked to town flying hall with my neighbor Wes. I was
headed into a drift when he came along! After program, got my car out of
another drift. Yay!
On Wednesday, February 5, 2014 8:35 AM, "awoelflebater@..."
<awoelflebater@...> wrote:
---In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, <sharelong60@...> wrote:
Seraph, though it may well be true that drug dealers are selfish, I don't
think that label, or any labels really, are gonna be much help in dealing with
the problem.
I think the idea was that addicts were "selfish", we already know dealers
don't give a crap about their customers. Addicts are only selfish in that their
world revolves around having the drug of their choice. In this, they are
willing to give up everything to have that drug; it is their best friend and it
is essential to their very existence, or so they believe. So, in this way
addicts are willing to turn their backs on all else that might be important and
vital in their lives in order to stay prostrating themselves at the altar of
their chosen addictive substance. But, that is not "selfish" to me as much as
it is blind and indicative of overwhelming with need.
Drug users need to be helped on the physiological level as well as
psychological. These addictions, even behavior ones like gambling, have strong
chemical bases.
I think this is a well-established fact.
I agree with you that people will look for someone to blame. But I think that
the screwedupness or imbalances of our whole society is to blame. For example,
why do people become drug dealers? I've heard that it's to support their family!
Huh?
I'm making a joke but I do think the financial imbalances create a lot of fear
and desperation in people. And then people take desperate measures.
I've completely lost you here.
On Tuesday, February 4, 2014 8:51 PM, "s3raphita@..." <s3raphita@...> wrote:
Re "There was a mad rush to find the dealers who sold him the drug.":
My thoughts exactly. If the pusher is caught he's going to have the book
thrown at him. Prepare yourself for some cringe-making playing to the gallery
in the court as the dealer is cast as the scum of the earth.
Hoffman was a fully-paid-up adult and has to take responsibility for his own
actions. What led him to addiction can only be known by his close family and
friends and I'm not in the business of judging his choices (though his now not
being there for his children is the real tragedy).
One psychologist who specialised in drug users came to the conclusion that
those who allow drugs to dominate their lives are essentially *selfish*.
Although that sounds simplistic and "judgemental" it has the ring of truth to
it as far as I'm concerned.
I first seriously noticed Hoffman in The Talented Mr. Ripley which remains one
of my very favourite modern films. Playing an obnoxious Yank abroad he
dominated every scene he appeared in.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mq462kfFKI8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mq462kfFKI8
