Cassandra,
I don't even know you or your husband, but I've been so sad for you today. I wish I could offer some words of comfort, but I know nothing can ease the pain right now. Just know that you have many friends here to turn to if you need someone to listen, or if you just want to grieve as you express love and pain for your lost babies. Melissa I sent you a card off-list to your email address; I hope you don't mind. _____ From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of C & J Sent: Sunday, June 24, 2007 3:06 PM To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org Subject: Tomi has joined Kisa and Koda I've just lost my closest friend other than my husband. Tomi and I have had a special bond ever since my husband brought him home. My husband was out walking the dog by the river in October of 2004, on a cold and rainy day. There was a kitten crying in the trees, cold and wet, and my husband couldn't just leave him there. I wasn't impressed at first, since we already had 4 cats, but Tomi quickly won me over. I've had a very close bond with him ever since. He was very timid at first, hiding whenever there was a strange noise or person, we often wondered how my husband was able to catch him to bring him home. His tail had been broken at the end at one time too, it sort of looked like a question mark when it was straight up. Tomi quickly came around though and trusted us, though he still always hid when any strangers came to the house. Tomi was the type of loving boy that always acknowledged your presence when you touched him or talked to him...or even looked at him sometimes. He never showed any signs of annoyance when I gave him too many hugs/kisses, and never got angry. 3.5 months ago when I found out he was anemic and had FeLV, I was devastated. I watched him slowly decline for nearly 2 months until he crashed and I was sure he would die. Amazingly he bounced back and gave me another good 8 weeks with him. Except during this time I had to watch Koda and Kisa (Tomi's close buddy) get sick and die, so I didn't get to spend as much time with my Tomi as I would have liked. Then just a few days after Kisa died on June 12, Tomi got sick and crashed again with the anemia. He was having a hard time breathing, and again he bounced back. Last week he had a huge appetite, eating everything I gave him, and drank lots of water. Yesterday, he started to crash again. Today, he was eating a little bit of liver I gave him and still drinking, but his breathing was becoming more labored. Then around noon, he began panting, and I watched him die in a way that will haunt me forever. He was so scared and crying because he couldn't catch his breath. This is absolutely the worse thing i've ever experienced. A huge part of the happiness in my life is now gone. I guess i'll just wander around like a zombie for awhile, and maybe the pain will eventually turn to numbness. Thank you all for the support you've given me through all of this. It looks like this ordeal that has been going on nonstop since March 9 is now over. Cassandra
