Dear Adrienne I really understand what you are going through and how difficult it is to make decisions with your head while your heart is punctured.
I think of the line in the poem by I Townsend that reads "We who choose to surround ourselves with lives more temporary than our own Live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached, Unable to accepts it's awful gaps We still would have it no other way" These are the most difficult times and it seems that at some point you have to know that Emma is on her own path and that all you can do is to help her fight and also love her enough to let her go. It is the best and the worst of times. She has the understanding that she is loved and cared for, which is a gift. Thinking of the both of you. Jane On Aug 22, 2008, at 10:07 AM, [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: > Dear Caroline, Belinda, Diane, and Michele, > > Thanks so much for sharing and for your kindness. It's very helpful > and comforting to hear from people what have been through something > similar and/or who truly care. > > I know there are no easy answers as to the best thing to do or not to > do. My Emma tested positive on both multiple snap tests and on > laboratory ELISA tests, so as much as I was hoping it was some kind of > mistake, she is indeed FeLV+. Over this past weekend, she suddenly > stopped eating and drinking, her coat went from shiny black (she's a > "tuxedo") to dull and covered with dandruff, her purr was gone, and > she > was lethargic. The ultrasound revealed enormous lymph nodes, and the > blood test revealed a RBC count of 10 (dangerously low) and a WBC > count > twice what it should be. Analysis of the bone marrow points to > lymphoma. The Vet is encouraging chemotherapy, but because of past > experiences with two of my dogs, I don't have a lot of faith in > Veterinary oncologists. I don't want a Veterinarian giving me false > help and encouraging me to pursue chemotherapy if, in fact, there's > little chance it will help, and a better chance that it won't help, or > worse, that it will cause suffering. > > Caroline, I can relate to your situation with the tumor on Monkee's > leg. My dog Rebel had a mast cell tumor on his leg, which the surgeon > was able to debulk, but he was unable to get clean margins. He > offered > amputation as an option, but Rebel was 12 years old and a big dog, and > I didn't think he would manage well (though I've seen many younger > dogs > and even cats do perfectly well with three legs). It turns out it was > really good that I didn't pursue amputation of the leg, because a week > later, Rebel had a tumor on his back. The tumor on his leg grew back > and continued to grow despite chemotherapy. It was the size of a > large > honeydew. But I continued to give him chemotherapy, hoping for a > miracle. There ended up being no miracle and I lost my Rebel. > Several years earlier, I'd put my dog, Daisy, through chemotherapy and > radiation when she was diagnosed with oral melanoma. My Veterinarian > told me I'd lose her in six months, with or without treatment. I went > to an oncologist anyway and was told there was a 20% chance the > treatment would help. So Daisy went throught the treatment, and a > week > before she died, another oncologist put her on an experimental drug > (Thalidomide) despite the fact that her lungs were full of tumors. > > I know that everyone's experiences are different and that we all want > to do what's best for our furry family members. It's just so hard to > know what is best. But your support and advice have been my saving > grace this week. I no longer feel quite so alone. Thank you. -- > Adrienne > > > _______________________________________________ > Felvtalk mailing list > Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org > http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org _______________________________________________ Felvtalk mailing list Felvtalk@felineleukemia.org http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
