One day, when you are ready, Pixie will send you someone who needs
you. That someone may be a feral, a FeLV+, an old cat that no one
wants any more but it will be the right one for you. And it may come
before you think you are ready but, rest assured, it will be the right
one at the right time. Dixie (FeLV+ and a wonderful little lady) sent
me a feral kitten (Copper Cougar) who was going to be a snack for a
hawk family. Two weeks later she said take two, they are small, and
sent me another one (Thomas Cougar) whose fate would have been the
same. And she sent two healthy males. She knew I had some awful
problems with spaying females. Both boys just celebrated their first
year birthday. All of this is to say that you will be ok. You will
continue to miss Pixie because there can never be a replacement and
that is ok too. Every time your heart breaks, it heals and becomes
stronger and bigger. Honest.
On May 28, 2009, at 4:39 PM, G D wrote:
Hi everyone.
I really, really appreciate
the support and wisdom this group has provided over the last 3 years
-- when strange things were happening (frothy clear vomit, a non-
dilating pupil) and I didn't know what to do, and especially during
the scary and sad days surrounding Pixie's death. This listserv is
an example of the internet at its finest, bringing together a
warm virtual community of FeLV cat guardians from across the globe.
You gave me the courage to adopt FeLV+ Pixie in the first place,
when I was only a foster parent to her and had no previous
experience with + cats.
It's been two weeks without Pixie. Grief feels like a private hell but
apparently I'm going through all the normal stages. I was in bad
shape when I went to pick up her ashes and the woman at the
crematorium asked if Pixie had lived a long life. I could
barely reply that she was still a baby when this disease snatched her.
But once I got her urn home and put it on the mantle, which was one
of her favorite places to perch, I felt strangely relieved: the awful
business of deterioration, dying and death was over. I
attached her collar tag to my keys (the jingling sound of which
made Pixie come running from any corner of the house in the hope she'd
get to go outside). I miss her 100 times day.
I'm comforted to know that many of you have survived the loss of a
beloved cat and have eventually come to love new cats.
Onwards and upwards,
Giselle
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Marylyn, Copper & Thomas
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