=========================== F R I E N D S H I P =========================== Original Sender : "M Fahmi Aulia" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> ---------------------------------------------------------------- Biar betenya agak2 ilang *buat yg bete*, nih, ada jokes.... Enjoy, deh...!! B^) *** Jokes begin *** source: lupa...sorry... Pengakuan seorang suami: "Setelah mendengar ceramah perkawinan tiga hari yang lalu, saya dan istri sepakat memegang janji untuk tidak akan pergi tidur kalau masih marah. Tapi mungkin kami harus membatalkan perjanjian itu, karena sudah tiga hari ini kami tidak tidur....." *** source: Diella Ceritanya Pak Bedu jengkel banget. setiap kali pohon mangganya berbuah, pasti buahnya dicolong oleh orang-orang entah dari mana. Tapi kalau ditungguin malingnya gak pernah datang giliran ditinggal, mangganya hilang. Banyak lagi. Saking kesalnya Pak Bedu menaruh kertas besar di pohon mangganya dengan tulisan"Tuhan tahu siapa yang mengambil mangga ini" Dengan lega ia meninggalkan pohon mangganya. berharap si pencopet terketuk hati nuraninya. Esok harinya lagi-lagi mangganya hilang, tapi tulisan di kertas itu bertambah "Tuhan tahu siapa yang mengambil mangga ini, tapi Tuhan tidak akan bilang siapa-siapa" *** source: Intel Inside PERBEDAAN SEPEDA DENGAN WANITA Sepeda tidak mempunyai orang tua. Sepeda tidak pernah peduli anda memandang sepeda lain. Sepeda tidak peduli sudah berapa sepeda yang anda kendarai. Sepeda tidak protes bila anda pulang terlambat. Sepeda tidak pernah sakit kepala. Anda tidak perlu mengajak sepeda anda makan malam, nonton film. Anda tidak perlu cemburu bila orang lain mengendarai sepeda anda. Anda bisa meminjamkannya kepada teman anda. Bila anda memarahi sepeda anda, anda tidak perlu meminta ma'af bila ingin mengedarainya. Anda tidak perlu mandi sebelum mengendarai sepeda. Anda bisa mengendarainya kapanpun anda suka. Sepeda tidak pernah hamil. ----- Original Message ----- REASONS WHY MOTORCYCLES ARE BETTER THAN MEN A motorcycle can go for more than one ride in an hour. Motorcycles never develop spare tires. Motorcycles last longer. Motorcycles don't get you pregnant. A motorcycle doesn't care what time of month it is. Motorcycles don't have parents. Your motorcycle will let you know if something is wrong. You don't have to kick your motorcycle to get it going. Your motorcycle won't judge your friends. If your motorcycle is boisterous, you can buy a muffler. You won't have to put your motorcycle through grad school. If your motorcycle smokes you can do something about it. Motorcycles don't care about how many other motorcycles you have ridden. When riding, you and your motorcycle both arrive at the same time. One motorcycle will satisfy you every time. Your motorcycle won't ogle other motorcycles. Your motorcycle won't care if you have a poster of your fantasy motorcycle. If your motorcycle has high mileage, you can just get a new one. Motorcycles don't care about breast size. If your motorcycle is too soft you can get new shocks. If your motorcycle is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics to correct it. You don't have to drink beer before your motorcycle looks appealing. You can be proud of your motorcycle regardless of the model. You don't have to go to Tiffany's to register your motorcycle. Your motorcycle won't beat you or try to make you feel inferior. You can ride a motorcycle as long as you want and it won't get limp. Your parents won't keep in touch with your old motorcycle after you dump it. Motorcycles always feel like going for a ride when you do. Motorcycles don't insult you if you are a novice. Your motorcycle never wants a night out alone with the other motorcycles. Motorcycles don't make you late. You don't have to primp before riding your motorcycle. Your motorcycle won't complain when you use protection. If your motorcycle doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better parts. You can't get a disease from a motorcycle. Your motorcycle won't care if you fake it. Motorcycles are always ready to stop when you are. Your motorcycle has a built in vibrator. Your motorcycle doesn't have to show off in front of other motorcycles. Your motorcycle won't lie to you. Your motorcycle doesn't care how heavy you are. In the morning, your motorcycle won't poke you in the back when it wants to go for a ride. You can turn the petcock off. Your motorcycle won't shrink when it's cold. If your motorcycle can't fire up, you can just replace the battery. You don't have to cook for your motorcycle. Your motorcycle can't ride around behind your back. If your motorcycle is cold you can choke it. Your motorcycle is always the right size because if it seems too small you can just get a new one. You can keep photos of your old motorcycles. Your motorcycle would rather go for a ride than watch sports. Your motorcycle can go for multiple rides. Motorcycles don't need pick-up lines. You only have to ride your motorcycle when you want to. Your motorcycle won't go for rides by itself. If baldness occurs, you can replace the tires. Motorcycles don't snore. *** source: Sukunesan WOMEN'S TRAINING COURSES - WOMEN THINK THEY ALREADY KNOW EVERYTHING, BUT WAIT...TRAINING COURSES ARE NOW AVAILABLE FOR WOMEN ON THE FOLLOWING SUBJECTS: 1. SILENCE, THE FINAL FRONTIER: WHERE NO WOMAN HAS GONE BEFORE 2. THE UNDISCOVERED SIDE OF BANKING: MAKING DEPOSITS 3. PARTIES: GOING WITHOUT NEW OUTFITS 4. MAN MANAGEMENT: MINOR HOUSEHOLD CHORES CAN WAIT TILL AFTER THE GAME 5. BATHROOM ETIQUETTE I: MEN NEED SPACE IN THE BATHROOM CABINET TOO 6. BATHROOM ETIQUETTE II: HIS RAZOR IS HIS 7. COMMUNICATION SKILLS I: TEARS THE LAST RESORT, NOT THE FIRST 8. COMMUNICATION SKILLS II: THINKING BEFORE SPEAKING 9. COMMUNICATION SKILLS III: GETTING WHAT YOU WANT WITHOUT NAGGING 10.DRIVING A CAR SAFELY: A SKILL YOU CAN ACQUIRE 11.TELEPHONE SKILLS: HOW TO HANG UP 12.INTRODUCTION TO PARKING 13.ADVANCED PARKING: BACKING INTOA SPACE 14. WATER RETENTION: FACT OR FAT 15. COOKING I: BRINGING BACK BACON, EGGS AND BUTTER 16. COOKING II: BRAN AND TOFU ARE NOT FOR HUMAN CONSUMPTION 17. COOKING III: HOW NOT TO INFLICT YOUR DIETS ON OTHER PEOPLE 18. COMPLIMENTS: ACCEPTING THEM GRACEFULLY 19. PMS: YOUR PROBLEM........NOT HIS 20. DANCING: WHY MEN DON'T LIKE TO 21. CLASSIC CLOTHING: WEARING OUTFITS YOU ALREADY HAVE 22. HOUSEHOLD DUST: A HARMLESS NATURAL OCCURRENCE ONLY WOMEN NOTICE 23. INTEGRATING YOUR LAUNDRY: WASHING IT ALL TOGETHER 24. OIL AND GAS: YOUR CAR NEEDS BOTH 25. TV REMOTES: FOR MEN ONLY *** source: D Winarko Petani Kaya. Seorang Petani kaya sedang mengadakan perjamuan sederhana bersama sama dengan ke enam anaknya yang telah menikah.Sebelum makan dia terlihat memandang para anak dan menantunya dan berkata,"Saya tidak melihat seorang cucu pun di meja ini,ketahuilah,barang siapa dapat memberi saya cucu pertama,akan saya beri hadiah Rp.100 Juta,nah,mari sekarang kita berdoa sebelum makan." Ketika petani itu selesai berdoa dan membuka matanya,dia hanya melihat dirinya dan istrinya di meja makan tersebut. Show Room Pernahkah anda bayangkan seorang petani membawa kotak berisi uang dan berniat membeli tunai sebuah traktor,dimana salesnya hanya tahu harga yang di bayar per bulan,tetapi tidak tahu harga tunainya,dan akuntannya menyerah karena tidak tahu bagaimana mencatat transaksinya dan sang manager membatalkan penjualan karena ia tidak akan bisa mendapat kredit poin. *** source: Ivy [X] Ada seorang pemuda di daerah sumatera utara sana, kebetulan sedang nonton film di bioskop di daerahnya. Salah satu adegan di film itu adalah seorang gadis bahenol yang sedang berusaha membuka bajunya..... setelah itu dilanjutkan dengan membuka kaos dalamnya.... dan tibalah pada adegan dimana gadis itu harus membuka juga BH-nya. Namun sebelum gadis itu berhasil membuka BH-nya .... Tiba-tiba ada Kereta api yang lewat dan menutupi si gadis. Setelah kereta api berlalu si gadis ternyata sudah berpakaian lengkap kembali. Kecewalah ucok, setelah beberapa saat sempat menahan dentuman jantungnya. Esoknya, si Ucok datang lagi, beli karcis lagi, nonton lagi film yg sama. Dan.....kecewa lagi. Tanpa kenal kata menyerah, esoknya pun dia masih nonton lagi.. sampai beberapa hari. Tukang karcis yang melihat ucok, sampai2 hapal wajah si ucok, karena penasaran maka di tanyalah ucok kita ini. "Hey Lay.... Kalo tidak salah, sudah kau tonton pilem ini berkali-kali..? Kenapa masih datang juga ? " "Ah benar kali itu bang....., tapi aku yakin bang .....suatu saat, kereta api keparat itu pastilah terlambat " Jawab si Ucok penuh nafsu. *** source: Rahmat Alat Kelamin Pria di Mata Ratu-Ratu Dunia Seuatu ketika, dilangsungkan lomba Ratu Dunia, salah satu pertanyaan yang muncul adalah : Bagaimana Anda menganalogikan alat kelamin pria sesuai dengan kondisi negara Anda ? Ms Amerika : Seperti laki-laki yang sopan, selalu berdiri setiap kali bertemu wanita Ms Philipina : Seperti gosip, dia berpindah dari satu mulut ke mulut yang lain. Ms Iran : Seperti pencuri, sukanya masuk lewat backdoor. Ms India : Seperti buruh, sanggup bekerja siang dan malam. Ms Indonesia : Seperti mobil Timor, kelihatannya tangguh, tapi sebenarnya gak ada apa-apanya. *** End of Jokes *** - koh fahmi - ---------------------------------------------------------------- Friendship MailingList is provided by PT Centrin Utama Maintained by : [EMAIL PROTECTED] To Post a msg : Mail to [EMAIL PROTECTED] To Unsubscribe : Mail to [EMAIL PROTECTED] . BODY : unsubscribe <Mailing List Name> For more information, send mail to [EMAIL PROTECTED] with "HELP" in the BODY of your mail (without quote). ----------------------------------------------------------------
