Hi,
having read ur response to suhail's mail am happy to note the points listed.
what I miss therein are words and their meaning as "committment" and
"monogamity". though these may be perceived differently my different ppl, I
personally feel that they are as important as any others listed and lack of
them is definately a negative drain on any longterm relationship.
thanks
RAKSHAS
----- Original Message ----
From: hirejaime <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: gay_bombay@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Tuesday, June 5, 2007 10:53:53 AM
Subject: g_b Re: "every gay guy knows the scene of long-term-relationships
among gays"
Hey Suhail,
What is the "scene" that every gay person is supposed to know about
long-term relationships. It's all a matter of when someone truly wants
to settle down. My partner and I would have been together for 21
years. He died ten years ago from cancer. My two best friends will be
celebrating their 15th anniversary on Sunday. We're a group of friends
in our mid 40s.
Things we learned about relationships, whether it be romantic or
friendship, is it must built on a solid foundation; open and honest
communication are essential; and learning to give positive charges
• Praise, agreeing with a good idea verbally.
• Affection
• Understanding, listening
• Open and honest expression
• Connection and involvement
• Cooperation, and listening
• Acceptance, tolerance
• Fun, humor
• Honor, speaking well of partner
• Showing positive interest
• Verbal tenderness
• Caring
• Forgiving spirit
• Validation
• Empathetic
This is what I believe are negative drains on a relationship
• Criticism (attacking partner's actions)
• Contempt (condescending or belittling partner)
• Defending your option
• Emotional or verbal withdrawal
• Isolation
• Seeking too much control or power
• Disapproval of mate's uniqueness
• Bad moods, sulking
• Disgracing or degrading partner
• Disinterest
• Harshness
• Neglecting joy or sadness
• Vindictive attitude
• Invalidation
• Falsely interpreting motives or feelings
Cheers!
Jaime
--- In [EMAIL PROTECTED] ups.com, Salil <salilmumbai@ ...> wrote:
>
>
> Hey Suhail
>
> You imply that gay men are generally uninterested or incapable of
long term relationships. This may be your experience, but please don't
generalise - because by doing so you are demotivating many on this
list. There are gay relationships being formed everyday - and I
personally know many which are long term.
>
> For the most part (there will be exceptions) - young straight men,
given the opportunity, are as promiscuous as young gay men.
Conversely, older gay men, given the opportunity, are as desirous of
having a long term relationship or marriage as older straight men. It
is to the gay men's credit that they have these relationships in spite
of society rather than with its support and strictures as straight men do.
>
> Cheers
> Salil
>
> suhail khan <sahilkhan992000@ ...> wrote:
>
> .........About how stable gay relationships are and how much do gays
believe in commitment and even if they do how much are they able to
keep that commitment, I dont think I need to make statements on that,
every gay guy knows the scene of long-term-relations hips among gays.
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ------------ --------- --------- ---
> Download prohibited? No problem! CHAT from any browser, without
download.
>
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