Thank you jc, most helpful. I hope you feel better for getting this off your chest. There are many people on this forum who 'have reasons' to berate others, demonise them or just because they have a bad streak in them, they must 'rub the vomit all over their bodies'.... My original post was to stop people from being so damn inhumane towards others on this forum. You have excelled yourself in this. I will now place you in Number One slot as a nasty person. One without conscience or care. What have I ever done to you that brings the worst of your outpourings aimed at me? I have said no more than some posters who have brought out their memories on this forum, many who have thanked me for mine & my thanking them for theirs. I have no demons regarding my past, nor my present. I am simply reiterating stuff that happened in the past, it is not a private matter in the least & using examples, using my family rather than berating someone else's. Vomiting in public? Is that how you see it? If that is the case, then my apologies to you, and my apologies for breathing the same air as you. As for getting my mother's permission, that would not be possible, as she passed away in 1999, as for me using her name & her personal life, well that is something she would have been proud of me for doing, she had no secrets, her life was an open book. As is my life & that of my brother AND his family. My wife & children support my comments on this forum & frown (even show disgust) when I show them some posters' views, such as yours. You jump to conclusions, accusing & berating without so much as a care in the world, stuck as you are on your computer with no other life to live than to belittle me & other posters who are piecing their lives together bit by bit, where there were missing parts which could only have been gotten by me with my vomiting in public this way. IF it was not for Goanet & the many people who were kind enough to get me the information I needed I would NEVER have known who my father REALLY was, if it was not for GOANET I would never have found some of my PORTUGUESE relatives, connections to Goa still ongoing, but this is because my life IS an open book. You do not have to read any posts of mine, just delete them....... its possible any day now I may vomit a bit too close to your own feet, on your own doorstep as it were. I know that 'my vomit' has reached some posters houses, and a few have damned me for bringing up the subjects of my father & other posts regarding collusion by some people in my time in Goa (pre-1961) suggesting that I ought to leave these matters alone & not mention any more any pre-1961 (nor post-1961) matters in Goa, the PIDE & the alliances between some Goans (of 'rank' or was it 'caste' within the Catholic majority & those who were anti-liberation / independence or whatever YOU call it). Yes vomit you call it. Wipe your shoes of this vomit, take a long walk. Dont be too close to me (ie : get involved), you never know the next time I feel sick, it may contain something familiar & then you will know the true smell of vomit. At the moment I keep it all to myself & my family. But then I may not have any vomit which involves you, so IGNORE ME, please(> ??). Just pretend you dont know me, never read anything I have written on this forum & then move on with your life. I have washed my linen in public for a purpose, (not as you think to air any demons or lay any ghosts to rest). I have no need of professional help, nor your amateur interference either. My REAL ghosts ARE in Goa, they will be vented & got rid of, lain to rest as it were when I visit Goa again, hopefully end of this year, in the meantime I am just having some fun, gathering information on my father's side of the family and sharing of my experiences & those of my family, and where they came from (not to mention HOW they came into being). If you dont like it, you know what to do, press the reject / delete button, or better still do as some of us have done with the 'more tiresome' posters and place these posters you dont like into the BULK folder where you can delete the whole lot of them in one go, without so much as a backward glance. But Selma is correct, there was much love between my parents, unwed as they were, (at my age these things I still frown on .... partnerships that produce children willy nilly (no pun intended) and then either abandon them as my mothers' parents did or as my father did with myself & my brother, without so much any legal standing for them, no claim or rights, under the law. You need only to look a few hundred yards, metres or take a few steps outside your own house, in any state in India to find abandoned children, children brought about by illicit visits, or those who are girls not wanted, other children caste out because of rape, or underage abuse, and so on. These all end up either dead, beaten or abused all over again, some may be lucky & end up in an Ashram for the Orphans... if they are lucky! Both my brother & I married, just to prove that a piece of paper IS security... for the children of the marriage & that this cycle of the unweds CAN & DOES get broken. I dont personally care about the paper, but my wife does, she definitely would not consider a relationship based only on love, she needed proof of it. And good for her. My children are not taunted at school as my brother & I were, my mother's generation & those prior to hers were aghast & she was shown up in class a bastard child. Those days ARE over, the newer generation comes along now, majority of which have kids of many colours, with many different fathers. So we are to congratulate them for falling in love, having as many children as they want, with all the rights of a house, paid for by the government, (you & I - in the UK) rights to have sufficient money to feed & cloth their children, sufficient money left over to buy cigarettes & get drunk, sufficiently drunk to have more children by the next randy little teen passing by, also drunk. In the town where we live, presently, the teenage preganancies are quite high. The UK has the highest teenage & underage pregnancies in Europe, all births, housing, cigarettes and more drink paid for by the government (you & I). What a life, all paid for by someone else, no wonder all these teens demand their rights nowadays, its all free! And I always thought with rights came responsiblities. Alas I am too old, an old codger not quite retirement age who gets annoyed with his very high tax bills & huge overheads in his business, especially when the taxman demands we pay on time or else! Annoyed at slights to his mental state, when in fact he is just annoyed, or trying to help others not to curse the world for their parents mistakes. Sure I am mad as hell about some issues, but am not rampant about it, I get annoyed by the likes of you jc who say things out of turn, annoyed at being ripped off at every turn, yes sure I am mad as hell, but they are not related in any way to my mental state, I get angry & mad as hell about some stuff that is chucked in my life's path, and that of my family. But I am old enough to reallise its part of living our daily lives, we have much to put up with, without being told to shut up & not 'vomit in public' when in fact we are trying to help resolve issues, not create them. I was trying to be part of the solution, not the problem. I apologise to everyone on this forum if you think I have gone overboard with my private life, it is to me, to my wife & all our close, and extended family, an OPEN BOOK, a life well lived, in all its entirerity, dark corners, bright lights, skeletons pushed out of the cupboards, so maybe you feel more secure by keeping yours well locked up, not wash you linen in public. That's ok cause the majority of people DO that, as a matter of course. Because they are ashamed of their part in creating their skeletons. I wonder what stains some are afraid will not come out in their wash? They know already, that is why they dont wash it in public. And that is their right, and their responsibility to towards those they love & cherish, in much the same way as I loved & cherished my mother, still do. Also my family who love & support everything I do (except sometimes when my youngest daughter is unhappy at the amount she gets for pocket money, and THAT look she gives me, melts my heart to then give her some more.........), otherwise I am not afraid to walk in the dark, certainly happy to do the same & walk in the light. John Monteiro --------------------------------------------------
"J. Colaco < jc>" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: It is my belief that John Monteiro has many personal demons which he needs to take care of outside this public forum. I also submit that he is unlikely to have had consent from either his mother or his grand-parents to have their privacy and confidentiality breached on GoaNet. If you have another sibling.............you are casting serious aspersions on the character of the very person who looked after you i.e. your mother....as well as on her parents. That makes you IMHO an absolutely ungrateful person. Why vomit in public? Unless you have a psychosomatic problem. If you need professional help - go get it. jc ----------------------------------------------- Regards John Monteiro Regards John Monteiro
