look... Joni is a complex person. She didn't have a personality like Laura Nyro where she could just put her muse on hold (Laura changed her primary focus from record making to childrearing and domestic living) She felt as though she had to keep going.
Maybe she wanted to continue to distance herself from her influences so they wouldn't come back from the past biting her in the ass when she looked over the results of her career. She has put a hell of a lot on the line in her lyrics and musically. When she perceived Hissing to be the critical failure it didn't end up being, she ran scared and still continued following her muse. But even the most esoteric person can only get so far with aloofness. Maybe she was used or even spoiled by the universal high regard she had received in her early years in the business. When a person who has up to a certain point in their life written essays with an A-grade starts getting Bs and Cs they either feel their writing to such a point that they recklessly yet confidently continue in that style or they conform. I think that even though she knew she was going down that charts, the sad inevitability of that fact was outweighed by the fact that she had more musical miles to travel. As for her powers, again she put a lot on the line with emotions and colors through words and music. And maybe as she woke up day after day in the 80's and 90's that optimism eventually curdled until the cautious optimism she showed about the states of her affairs just withered. So not being strong enough at these points or merely sickened from overanalization of these facts, she eventually pulled up the bridges and rejected those, Laura Nyro/Judy Collins, who she had originally cited as her influences. I just feel that Joni is an incredibly sensitive soul who like many of us masks her insecurities through a brisk and witty facade. All artists don't get rid of their demons souly through writing. I think Laura still had plenty of demons and while Eli, Tendaberry, and Christmas did a lot to alleviate those she like all other artists still had doubts. more to come later...please digest ;)
