The world is full of idiots...

[Cameron MacLean]

Let me relay to you one of the weirder arguments I just encountered..   On my way through Acton this afternoon, I stopped by the grocery store to pick up some lunch stuff.  Normally, the deli staff is fine, but the short bus must have dropped off one of the employees today.   Deli worker:  Hi, can I help you? Me: Yes please, can I have half a kilo of black forest ham? (note, I weigh 225 lbs, I have no idea how many kilos that is.  I order my meat in kilos or grams, I have no idea what a pound of meat looks like.  Chalk this up to the education system of the 70's). DW:  Sliced or shaved? Me: Shaved please. (she cuts the meat, hands me the package.  I have Sabrina on my shoulders, who insists on holding the package.  I finally look at it, because it doesn't look like half a kilo to me, and return to the deli counter). Me:  'Scuse me, I ordered a half kilo of ham, shaved, and this is a quarter kilo (278g, to be precise), sliced. DW: Oops, sorry. (she takes the package, and starts to cut some more ham, shaved.  Finishes, hands it back to me). Me:  Sorry, that's still only 275g of ham.  Could you add some more? I'd like half a kilo please. (she looks at me like I"m from outer space) DW:   That IS half a kilo. Me:  (......pause....).  How do you figure? DW:  Well, a kilo is 454. Me:  454 what? DW:  You know, 454, uh...., so half that is about 275 (actually, 227, but what's 1/20 kg among friends) Me:  454 grams?  (not quite sure I heard her right.  Now I've realized that I'm dealing with a deli store worker, in Acton, who is struggling with grade 2 math concepts.  How do I handle this gently, without insulting her, or making her feel stupid.) Me:  Um, sorry, my mistake. I thought a pound is 454 grams.  A kilo is 1000 grams. DW:  No no, it's OK.  1000 grams?  That'd be like,  a LOT of meat!  (holding her hands wide for effect) Me:  Ri-i-i-ght.  Well, typically, a kilo refers to 1000. Like a kilometer is 1000 meters.  So half a kilometer is 500 meters.  So, half a kilogram is 500 grams. DW:  (pauses...I can see the wheels clunking.  Think they need some grease). Sorry, we don't measure product in kilograms.  Only pounds and grams. Me:  (..one eyebrow raised...). Okay then.  May I have 500 grams of blackforest ham, shaved, then? DW: 500 grams?  Sure thing. (and she gets it right)   Not quite sure what happened there, but it certainly serves to reinforce my long-held notion that the Acton gene pool needs some chlorine...   ..Cameron