This was my life too. I'm sending it on to my son, who has two small daughters, lest he forget. Debbie
Mother of 2, sibling of 7, daughter of a dad who raised me like this. Thanks. --- Joy <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > After reading the posts written about lack of > passion in children's lives, lack of being able to > find connections that will bring learning alive for > them, I feel a need to respond. I do not blame > testing or NCLB. I don't blame teachers or parents, > or the educational system in our country. I blame > society and fear. > Fear is a mighty force to overcome. Look at the > things children are taught to fear: the environment, > terrorists, their neighbors, their families, their > classmates. Everywhere they look there is something > to be afraid of. Even at school we have over > regulated things so much that my school has only 1 > small piece of playground equipment. I've been told > we will never have swings because of the high > insurance rates, and the fear of being sued. The > state has forbidden for us to play certain games > that I remember from childhood - we can actually > lose our teaching license if we are caught playing > or allowing these games to be played at school! > Parents are afraid for the safety of their > children; sometimes the fears are justified, > sometimes they are not. When I was a child I was > allowed to roam the neighborhood. I could wander > through the woods, hike along a stream, or fish in a > lake, river, or pond. We thought nothing of walking > through other people's lawns to get to our friends > house, or of hopping on our bikes and riding for > hours on end. My friends and I used to ride all over > town, and when I visited my cousin's house in > Raleigh or Richmond, we walked by ourselves to the > movie theater or shopping center. I was lucky to > live in a variety of cities, and no matter where we > lived, this was true for myself and my friends. > We didn't have adult supervised activities, or > sports (well, there was Little League for boys). And > yes there were arguments, fights, bumps and bruises, > and even a few broken bones. But we worked it out > amongst ourselves as best we could. Usually the hurt > party would run home, get patched up, and return to > the "scene of the crime" as quickly as possible. > Much to the dismay of our moms, many of us would > ignore scrapes, scratches, and busted up knees until > we heard our moms calling us to come home for lunch > or dinner. (OK, the broken bones did require adult > intervention.) > We didn't have video games, videos, boom boxes, > CDs, Walkman, etc. You were the envy of the > neighborhood if you had an AM transistor radio or a > color TV. There was no cable, and only about 3 or 4 > stations. (OK, now you know I grew up with the > pioneers!) Most of the time we either played cards, > board games, or we made up our own games and role > played from our own imaginations. A favorite > activity of mine was making a variety show for the > neighborhood. We'd create little skits, then scour > our homes for cast off clothing and props. Sometimes > the play would change based on what we found. We'd > sing, dance, and play tennis racket guitars. We'd do > magic tricks, and tell lame jokes. We'd use > someone's garage or clothes line for a stage. We'd > promote our show by painting posters that we'd > plaster up and down the street, and sell tickets > door to door to our neighbors. On show day we'd > prepare treats to sell. We made enough money from > ticket sales in the neighborhood to keep us in > penny candy for the entire summer. > When we were in the woods we'd always stumble on > something fascinating that would occupy us for > hours. We'd bring home pieces of moss, rocks, > sticks, tadpoles, caterpillars, you name it, we > studied it. Drawing and painting were also fun pass > times, as was reading. We had a favorite tree or > corner in someone's house where we'd stop playing > and just read for awhile. None of us ever went > anywhere without a book. > We also had chores, and family duties to perform. > If we didn't do it, it didn't get done, and the > family would do without. I learned to clean > everything from the kitchen and bathroom to the > garage and garden before I was in 1st grade. I had > to help my mom prepare dinner every night. We rarely > went out to eat, and everything was made from > scratch, or very close. We didn't have microwaves, > and frozen dinners were something we ate if we had a > babysitter. When I wasn't helping my mom, I was > working alongside my dad as he built or repaired > things. I was the oldest, and was his "right hand > (wo)man." I learned the names of tools, and how to > use them by his side. (My dad was in sales and > marketing, but loved tinkering around the house.) > I don't see kids doing these things anymore. > Before I returned to college to become a teacher I > was a Girl Scout troop leader and adult trainer. One > day when we were practicing skills for camping I > discovered that the only kid in our troop who could > cut and peel vegetables, measure ingredients, or > understand how to follow a simple recipe was my > daughter. None of the other girls could do any of > this, they were especially clueless about measuring > ingredients. They had quite a time learning how to > do this! > When I ran our county's day camp I discovered that > girls wouldn't try to do anything because they'd > never been allowed to try anythings they couldn't be > 100% successful with. They weren't allowed to touch > tools. They didn't know how to hold a hammer, or > even how to sweep! I actually had a mom get upset > with me because each girl had a job helping to clean > up after meals. She didn't want her daughter > cleaning up after other people. She told me she does > everything for her daughter and didn't think it was > appropriate for me to ask her or any of the girls to > do these tasks. > Now that I'm a teacher, I see this too. Parents > doing way too much for their kids, not allowing them > to struggle with anything. To me they are sending a > silent message to their kids that they think they > are incompetent. The kids hear the message loud and > clear and truly believe they can't do anything. This > is why I stopped sending projects home, and started > having the kids complete all their project work at > school. They get less done, and the projects look > like kids did them. (I think that is good, my > parents aren't so crazy about it because the other > teachers still have major parts of their projects > done at home and they come back slick and > "professional" looking, while ours have that "kid > made" look with all their developmental flaws > hanging out.) Parents need training on how to give > appropriate levels of help, and what to expect from > their children. We are teaching children to rely too > much on others for their entertainment and sense of > worth. My grandmother used to > encourage me to find my own entertainment by > telling me: "Only boring people are bored, and you > are not a boring person, go outside and figure out > something for yourself." I'd grumble, but usually > found something to do that would have me engrossed > for the rest of the day. > Kids develop passion when they are allowed to try > things and take risks. So what if your rocket is > crooked and the paint doesn't look airbrushed. Can > you get it off the ground? If it fails, do you have > the guts to try it again and again and again? Can > you figure out how to repair it without a jaunt to > the quickie mart, or are you afraid to tell anyone > about what you've done because you'll face ridicule > for failure? > Winston Churchill said "We have nothing to fear, > but fear itself." How can we as a society make the > world a less fearsome place for our children? How > can we encourage them to take risks, to fail, and to > try again? How can we encourage more imaginative > play? More active play? More investigative play? Can > we let go of the apron strings long enough for our > children to learn about themselves? I inscribed the > inside of my college ring with Socrates' philosophy > "Know Thyself." Can we allow children the time to do > this for themselves? > Until our society changes, we educators will have > to change our expectations, approaches, and > pedagogical style to meet the children where they > are when they come to us. Society is changing, but > it's not going back to the "good ole days." (Thank > goodness, there was lots in those days that wasn't > so good, like blatant racism and oppression.) What > can we do as teachers to influence our society to > help children, to understand children, to "pay it > forward" so our society is a better place for > children? I don't have answers, only a seeimingly > continuous string of questions. > If you are still awake, sorry, I'll climb off the > soapbox now! Thank you for listening to my stream of > conciousness. Your forgiveness for my going off > topic in a rant is greatly appreciated! > I hope you all have a glorious holiday, and are > lucky to be surrounded by family and friends. > Happy Holidays, > > > > Joy/NC/4 > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > How children learn is as important as what they > learn: process and content go hand in hand. > http://www.responsiveclassroom.org > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > Do You Yahoo!? > Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam > protection around > === message truncated === __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around http://mail.yahoo.com _______________________________________________ Mosaic mailing list Mosaic@literacyworkshop.org To unsubscribe or modify your membership please go to http://literacyworkshop.org/mailman/options/mosaic_literacyworkshop.org. Search the MOSAIC archives at http://snipurl.com/MosaicArchive.
