On Tue, 13 Dec 1994 [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
> A one year free subscription to Capitalism, Nature, Socialism will be
> given the pen-ler who in the judgement of a panel of experts in Santa
> Cruz best answers the following question:
>
> How can the right-wing be for family values and against a family wage
> at the same time?
Gosh darn it Jim. You haven't read the whole Contract on America--you
can't isolate the elements.
First, you don't need government to help assure a family wage if we get
the Satanists out of our schools. We'll have group prayer every morning
begging God not to send our jobs overseas to heathens.
Secondly, with the end of affirmative action, honest hard-working whites
can again corner the market on any remaining high-wage jobs.
Thirdly, the Republicans will hire Paul Hill to stalk divorce
courts like he used to stalk abortion clinics. Also, with new "loser
pays" rules introduced for court costs by the Republicans, no
ordinary person will dare enter a courtroom, so divorces will become a
thing of the past.
Fourth, we will replace Aid to Families with Dependent Children with the
new Republican "guns for tots" program; children will now be empowered to
demand that their parents stay together--OR ELSE.
Gosh, it's so obvious to any red-blooded American, folks.
--Nathan Newman
