Phil, Adios, good-bye, best of luck. Your welcome to keep the Bush family.
On Nov 25, 4:03 pm, Philobealo <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > Ok, Folks. Texas has given you complainers plenty of time to get used > to the election results.. After listening to all the whiners after the > election, some folks from Real Texas have decided that we might just > take matters into our own hands. > > First, a little history lesson. It's our independent nature > to point out the people who enjoy the Texas Lifestyle have the right > to secede and form our own country (it was in the agreement that > annexed Texas as a state), whenever the people of Texas choose to do > so. Some other states also have this right. The difference is, Texas > has actually pulled that trigger before. > > Yes, Texas was an Independent Republic before it became a state and > can secede. Nothing inherently prohibits that from taking place. > > Let's get this straight. John McCain, a real American hero, carried > Texas by over a million votes. Texans can still smell the fires of > the Twin Towers . We would also honor President Bush. George Bush > simply did what any Real Texan would do and that is to go try his best > to annihilate anyone who was responsible for attacking us. We don't > fault him for that. We applaud that sort of behavior. It's Texas > politics, Texas style. > > We're ready to secede. > > Don't get me wrong. We like ya'll — We just don't want to be like > ya'll.. > > #1: Barak Obama becomes President of the United States (all the other > 49 states). > > #2: Ross Perot becomes the next President of the Republic of Texas and > invites John McCain to be an honorary Texan. We honor our heroes in > Texas and honor their service. McCain is welcome here and he can be > Secretary of the Texas Navy. Native Texan George Foreman will be > Secretary of Defense. After > that is all said and done, we wish Mr. Obama well. We really do. > > #3. We expect one of Perot's first acts as President of the Republic > will be to tear down the border wall and erect a 10' wall around > Austin to keep the "Austin Weird" folks in and away from the rest of > us. If they will > just pipe their Texas music out over the wall, it will keep the rest > of us happy. (Just kidding my Austin relatives on that one.) > #4. Willie will be Secretary of Agriculture and music. Wonder what he > will grow? > > So what does Texas have to do to survive as a Republic? Here's a few > things to be aware of. Texas is the 11th largest economy on the > planet. We are bigger than Spain and right behind Great Britain. We > are also > bigger than Russia . We are an economic force to be reckoned with. We > have a constitutional amendment to balance our budget….and we do it > (are you listening California?). We also have a multi-billion dollar > budget surplus this year. We are so big, we have our own > power grid. Yes, that's true.. > What else? > NASA is in Houston . (we will control the space industry). > We refine over 85% of the gasoline in the United States. > Defense Industry? We have over 65% of it. The term "Don't mess with > Texas," will take on a whole new > meaning. > Oil - we can supply all the oil the Republic of Texas will need for > the next 300 years. Obama states? Sorry about that. > > As David Werst said, "We like ya'll, we just don't want to be like > ya'll." You can buy oil (pronounced like ya'll) from us instead of > terrorist countries that hate you. We will love you for paying so much > to us instead of Saudi Arabia, Venezuela, Kuwait and others. > > You don't want to 'drill baby drill' or put up with those > nasty oil wells? Well, we do and we know how to do it without > polluting the land, air, and sea. BTW-We have our own ports and > shipping lanes. We're also not > "waiting on our FEMA check" to rebuild Galveston . We are doing it > right now as we speak. > Natural Gas - Again we have all we need and again, it's just too bad > about you blue Obama states who don't want drilling. We've been > driving around with those big tanks in the backs of our pickups for > years now. We'll switch over to compressed natural gas. Obama will > figure a way to keep ya'll warm….according to your need. Or, you could > use ocean waves, or make friends > with Hugo Chavez or what's his name in Iran . > > Computer Industry - we currently lead the nation in > producing computer chips and communications: Small places like Texas > Instruments, Dell, EDS, Raytheon, Motorola, Intel, Austin Technology > Centers, etc., etc. The list goes on and on. > Health Centers - We have the largest research centers for cancer > research, the best burn centers and the top trauma units in the world, > and other large health centers. > We have enough colleges to keep us going: UT, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, > Texas State University, Rice, SMU, TCU, University of Houston, Baylor, > UNT, Texas Women's University, etc. Ivy grows better in the south > anyway. By the way, we play some pretty good football and baseball at > those schools. > We have a ready supply of workers (just open the > border when we need some more). > > But, we won't have an illegal immigration problem. Former Texas > Governor candidate Kinky Friedman solved that. He proposed we pay 5 > Mexican generals a million a year to control illegal immigration-folks > coming > from Mexico to Texas illegally. For every illegal that slips through, > we deduct $10,000. Wonder how many will get across the border into > Texas? We won't need a > Border Patrol. > > We like tourism. Come stay a while. Enjoy a Cowboys game or go to Six > Flags over Texas ….then go home. We don't need any more Californians > or New Yorkers coming here and messing things up. Or, they could live > in Austin where we can keep an eye on 'em. > > We have control of the paper industry, plastics, insurance, etc. In > case of a foreign invasion, we have the Texas National Guard and the > Texas Air National Guard. We don't have an army but since everybody > down here is heavily armed and has at least six rifles and a pile of > ammo, we can raise an army in 6 hours if we need it. That's the Texas > way. When the tower sniper started shooting in Austin a few years > back, citizens piled out of their cars and pickups and started > returning fire within 2 minutes. Our citizens are > licensed to carry handguns on their person. > > We have a saying down here: "If you mess with the bull, you're gonna > get the horn." And an even more remarkable finding from the past…. > Average Murder per 100,000 residents in counties won by Bush: 0.1 of > one percent. > Average Murder per 100,000 residents in counties won by Gore: 13.2. > In Texas, even some of our school teachers carry guns. We won't > surrender our kids to nuts and terrorists without a fight. Don't even > think about messing with us. > If you want the sticker, click on it… > > If the situation really gets bad, we can always call the > Texas DPS and ask them to send over a couple of Texas Rangers. > We are totally self sufficient in beef, poultry, hogs and vegetable > produce and everybody down here knows how to cook them so that they > taste good. Don't need any food. > > Arts? Bob Wills is still the king, but we also like > different types of music, Country….and….Western. We even have our own > beer. Lone Star, The National Beer of Texas . This just names a few of > the items that will > keep the Republic of Texas in good shape. There isn't a thing out > there that we need and don't have. Just keep on reading David Werst's > Real Texas Blog for more > details on how to be a Real Texan. > > Now to the rest of the United States under President Obama: > Since you won't have the refineries to get gas for your cars, We'll > sell you gas too. We'll call the gas company Texasco or something like > that. Happy to do it. > You won't have any TV as the space center in Houston will cut off your > communications or ask you to pay for the signal. It will be Texas > Direct TV. Hank Jr. will move here and be in charge of programming > > Did you know we don't even have an income tax? > > We have all we need here in God's country and like I've already said, > if we don't have it, we don't need it. We will have cheap, plentiful > energy. The new Texas Secretary of Energy, T. Boone Pickens will be > putting up thousands of wind generators all over the west Texas plains > and since everybody else thinks Texas is full of hot air, we might as > well take advantage > of it. > > Good luck. Ya'll are gonna need it. > Signed, The People of Real Texas --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Thanks for being part of "PoliticalForum" at Google Groups. 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