Yesterday I had a pleasant day with the family, with the exception of 
having the pleasure of being heckled/scolded/yelled at for the first time 
in years while riding a bicycle in public... while riding with our 14month 
old son... because I was riding with my 14month old son.

We decided to take our son apple picking at a nearby orchard only 2 miles 
away.  The majority of the route cuts through a network of parks and 
multiuse trails in preserved farmland/meadows but does require some 
pavement (along two different 2 lane roads.)  Naturally, being cyclists and 
having bikes and gear suitable for carrying a few extra pounds of flesh and 
produce we decided to keep the car parked for the day and take the scenic 
route and make an afternoon of it considering the close proximity, familiar 
route, and favorable weather.

The off pavement portion is on multiuse paths to which we directly connect 
through a park at the back of our neighborhood.  Part of the trail runs 
parallel to one of the paved roads we'll need to double-back on to ride 
for 1000 to 2000ft before turning onto the intersecting road on 
which the orchard is located a mile further down.

En route to the farm, during that first 1000-2000ft straight paved section, 
is where we encountered the indignant motorist.  The road is an old 2-lane 
farm road and admittedly not ideal for cycling with an insufficient 
shoulder and drainage ditches on either side, but not very heavily 
trafficked.  We entered the road with a right hand turn at the 
nearest crossing, my son and I out front with my wife trailing a couple 
hundred feet or so behind.  As we were nearing the left turn I glance back 
and see a vehicle approaching from a slight distance back behind my 
wife but with lots of space still between us (and the vehicle) and the 
intersection almost upon us I deliberately signal our turn and begin to 
take the lane for the final 50yds or so.  As we complete our turn and begin 
to head into the last mile on the even less trafficked 2 lane 
residential/rural road the driver proceeds to yell "...something something 
something... with an f#$%!ng child you f#$%!ng a-hole!" just as he floors 
the gas to accelerate and regain his desired mph.

There was nothing confrontational about the situation otherwise... we were 
never even close enough to make eye contact, the driver never attempted to 
pass aggressively or do anything to otherwise put us in harms way, nor did 
I make any abrupt or sudden movements, etc.  This was the first vehicle to 
encounter us heading in the same direction for the entire short stretch and 
I made what I felt was the safest and most reasonable decision after 
surveying our surroundings by taking the lane and swiftly turning off the 
busier of the two roads while we had the space and timing to safely do so.

Our child's safety is something we certainly do not take lightly.  I could 
sympathize with concern over the general element of risk of cycling on 
today's roads, and yes, this same risk clearly extends to my child 
passenger but apparently this person was so deeply offended enough by our 
actions of simply cycling with a toddler that they felt the need to erupt 
into an outburst of anger as they sped past... the irony of which is that 
in their final moment within our limited interaction they did nothing more 
than demonstrate the exact kind of driving behavior that puts all 
cyclists/pedestrians/motorists at risk (distracted/aggressive/etc.) and 
would jeopardize the safety of the child they seemed so concerned about in 
the first place.

It could be that I'm a little overly sensitive still being a new parent, 
and new to family cycling, and maybe the amount of time that's lapsed 
between prior conflicts with motorists has re-sensitized me to an extent 
(several years ago I'd expect nothing less from most drivers, just sans the 
"child" part) but I've had this brief moment nagging me a bit this morning 
and curious to know what others have experienced in terms of cycling with 
kids and overly opinionated motorists, etc.?

I recall reading of others who bike often with children, or incorporate it 
much more into daily life... sometimes dropping off and picking up kids at 
school, etc.  Many of our local roads are less than desirable (same reasons 
noted above: insufficient shoulders, mostly) and many I've already ruled 
out for riding with our son and until this weekend all rides have been 
contained almost exclusively to our local park/trail system and rides into 
our small downtown (1 mile down from our development on low traffic 
residential roads.)

I'm genuinely curious, how does everyone else evaluate their child/no child 
routes?  Have you been similarly lectured by non-cyclists and has it been a 
recurring theme?  I already have several non-cyclists in my family 
who've previously considered me crazy for cycling on roads with motorized 
vehicles long before our son arrived.  I'm very conscientious about 
exposing him to unnecessary risk while riding and already severely restrict 
our short routes but I also take issue with the false 
assumption/belief that so many people seem to adopt that only cars belong 
on our roads.  How do you strike a balance between inclusive cycling 
and teaching your children a share-the-road perspective while prioritizing 
safety and precautionary discretion?

Thanks for reading (and thank you in advance for your thoughts) and please 
do not misinterpret my sharing this as having any sort of divisive 
anti-motorist/pro-cyclist agenda.  I'm genuinely curious what others have 
experienced and how you've approached finding balance in your own 
cycling/parenting life?

Best,
Brian Cole
Lawrenceville, NJ

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