FORREST GUMP GOES TO HEAVEN

 

The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He

 

is at

 

The Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are

 

closed,

 

And Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.

 

St. Peter said, "Well, Forrest,

 

It is certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you.

 

I must

 

Tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we have

 

been administering

 

An entrance examination for everyone. The test is short, but you

 

have to

 

Pass it before you can get into Heaven."

 

Forrest responds, "It sure is

 

Good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever told me about any

 

entrance

 

Exam. I sure hope that the test ain't too hard.

 

Life was a big enough test

 

As it was."

 

St. Peter continued, "Yes, I

 

Know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.

 

First:

 

What two days of the week begin with the letter T?

 

Second:

 

How many seconds are there in a year?

 

Third:

 

What is God's first name?"

 

Forrest leaves to think the questions

 

Over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waves him

 

up, and

 

Says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over,

 

Tell me your answers"

 

Forrest replied, "Well, the

 

First one -- which two days in the week begins with the letter "T"?

 

Shucks, that one is easy. That would be Today and Tomorrow."

 

The Saint's eyes opened wide and

 

He exclaimed, "Forrest, that is not what I was thinking, but you do

 

Have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit

 

For that answer. How about the next one?" asked St. Peter.

 

"How many seconds in a year?

 

Now that one is harder," replied Forrest, but I thunk and thunk about

 

That, and I guess the only answer can be twelve."

 

Astounded, St. Peter said, "Twelve?

 

Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with

 

twelve seconds

 

In a year?"

 

Forrest replied, "Shucks, there's

 

Got to be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd... "

 

"Hold it," interrupts St.

 

Peter. "I see where you are going with this, and I see your point,

 

Though that was not quite what I had in mind....but I will have to

 

give

 

You credit for that one, too. Let us go on with the third and

 

final question.

 

Can you tell me God's first name"?

 

"Sure," Forrest replied,

 

"it's Andy."

 

"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated

 

And frustrated St Peter.

 

"Ok, I can understand how you

 

Came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how

 

in the

 

World did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"

 

"Shucks, that was the easiest

 

One of all," Forrest replied. "I learnt it from the song, "ANDY

 

WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN."

 

St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates,

 

And said: "Run Forrest, run."

 

don't wait till the 11th hour to be saved. You might die at 10:30.



When we are grateful for the good we already have,
we attract more good into our life.
On the other hand, when we are ungrateful, we tend to shut ourselves off from 
the good we might otherwise experience.
~Sylvia
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