SAM
On Sat, Feb 22, 2020, 22:08 Lerato Khathi <
booki...@uzuriartistbookingsandmanagement.com> wrote:
> somebdy pls help me unsubscribe from this group .
> i'd forgotten how to do it .
> pls need to get out of here asap .
>
> On Sun, 23 Feb 2020 at 10:47, Mister Jones
> wrote:
>
>> Yes, I know what gaslighting is and that's clearly not what's going on
>> here.
>>
>> I'll quit with this whole topic. I saw what was written and it set me
>> off. My apologies to you, Denise, for responding the way I did and to the
>> list for even engaging in it.
>>
>> Been listening to a bunch of Boiler Room sets lately. Kenny Larkin,
>> Octave One, and the like.
>>
>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:30 PM Denise Dalphond
>> wrote:
>>
>>> Ever heard of gaslighting? You’re free to join the #MeToo movement. I
>>> don’t care about yr background. And I don’t care about yr feelings. I like
>>> techno music, though. A lot. I heard a techno song on Ann Arbor radio just
>>> the other day.
>>>
>>> Denise
>>>
>>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:24 PM Mister Jones
>>> wrote:
>>>
True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of
what you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk more
if we received the same encouragement and support women did, but we
don't... At all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our
harassment claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're
complaining about. A man filing a report against a female rapist is likely
to be laughed out of the station (this isn't speculation, it's documented
to have happened). So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because,
like male victims of domestic abuse, there's zero support for us.
Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community
standing behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up and
do it completely alone?
On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond <
denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote:
> I said most children have been molested by at least one family member.
> Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse people.
>
> Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to
> remember how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff.
>
>
>
> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones
> wrote:
>
>> So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of
>> issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a
>> child,
>> not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for
>> three
>> years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male
>> classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my
>> neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life
>> (I'm
>> just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has
>> destroyed
>> my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with
>> the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll
>> likely
>> have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids,
>> where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age.
>>
>> Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one
>> form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of
>> you...
>> But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that,
>> as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like
>> myself
>> are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in
>> general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim
>> of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys
>> not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we
>> should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown
>> woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you
>> should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades,
>> telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother
>> was
>> devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially
>> since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us
>> (their
>> mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed
>> because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted like
>> someone that had been molested; something I always denied. Everyone asked
>> "why didn't you ever say something?" not realizing that when you're only
>> 7
>> years old you really don't know how to process something like this, and
>> in
>> a society back then in the late 70's where this kind of stuff was
