Where do you get them all from?
Lots of friends with the type of job that I want - time on your hands. Can I
join your mailing list.
Or do you have one of your Artificial Intelligence Machines making them up.
If so.Natasha, that's one hell of a bot you've got there ;-)
Gaz
Natasha wrote in message
[EMAIL PROTECTED]">news:[EMAIL PROTECTED]...
The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents
to
tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.
The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their
stories.
Kathy said, My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens.
One
time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of
the
pickup when we hit a bump in the road and all the eggs went flying and
broke
and made a mess.
And what's the moral of the story? asked the teacher
Don't put all your eggs in one basket!
Very good, said the teacher.Next little Lucy raised and hand and said,
Our family are farmers too. But we raise chickens for the meat market.
We had a dozen eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten live
chicks and the moral to this story is,
don't count your chickens until they're hatched.
That was a fine story Lucy. Johnny, do you have a story to share?
Yes, ma'am, my daddy told me this story about my Aunt Karen. Aunt
Karen
was a flight engineer in Afghanistan and her plane got hit. She had to
bail
out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey, a
machine
gun and a machete. She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't
break and then she landed right in the middle of 100 bin Laden's
troops. She
killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of
bullets,
then she killed twenty more with the machete till the blade broke and
then
she killed Osama bin Laden and the last ten with her bare hands.
Good heavens, said the horrified teacher, what kind of moral did your
daddy tell you from that horrible story?
Don't mess with Aunt Karen when she's been drinking!
-
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
GENERAL EQUATIONS STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to
understand her at all.
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot
more willing to die.
MEMORY
Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no use in two
people remembering the same thing.
APPEARANCE
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow
deteriorate during the night.
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after
that is the beginning of a new argument.
COMPREHENSION
There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before
marriage and after marriage
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs
and cackling, telling me, You're next. They stopped after I started
doing the same thing to them at funerals.
--
Natasha Flazynski
CCNA, MCSE
http://www.ciscobot.com
My Cisco information site.
http://www.botbuilders.com
Artificial Intelligence and Linux development
Message Posted at:
http://www.groupstudy.com/form/read.php?f=7i=20729t=20606
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