-Caveat Lector-
A KINDER, GENTLER LYNCH MOB | PAGE 1, 2
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The façade of "judiciousness" and "bipartisanship" that the pious media, ever
cowed by the musty aura of Historic Constitutional Events, dark-wooded
chambers, invocations of "our national honor" and other useful fig leafs for
skullduggery, tried to sell us has vanished without a trace. Hyde, the Iran-
contra apologist and wisecracking GOP attack dog who was elevated to Solomon-
like heights of wisdom by the media before the disgraceful House Judicial
proceedings began, has now taken up final residence in the trash can with
unsavory American byproducts like our anal home-grown Robespierre, Kenneth
Starr, and the maniacal Bob Barr, who apparently believes that Clinton should
have been impeached at birth. There was Hyde this weekend on the talk shows,
saying that Clinton should resign. This paragon of impartiality apparently
modeled his jurisprudential approach on the Red Queen in "Alice in
Wonderland," who, as a witness departs in the trial of the Knave of Hearts,
says under her voice, "And just take off his head outside." But, gosh, he sure
sounds courtly talking that parliamentary talk.
In fact, Hyde may have been taking those groveling Times setup pieces a little
too seriously, for this weekend he began to invoke no less a figure than Jesus
Christ. Asked by Cokie Roberts why he advocated impeachment and didn't think
censure should be an option despite popular opinion, he replied, "If Jesus
Christ had taken a poll, he would never have preached the gospel." This is a
wonderful addition to the great American tradition of reactionary invocations
of Jesus, who after patriotism represents the best refuge for scoundrels. (The
all-time winner remains that English-only advocate who declaimed, "If English
was good enough for Jesus, it's good enough for me.") With all due respect to
the pious motivations behind Chairman Hyde's religious parallel, however, it
may not be a good strategy for him to go there. Somehow, when one looks at the
faces of Clinton's judges -- the pig-eyed ex-exterminator Tom DeLay; the
robotic, hate-filled Barr; the snidely, vitriolic David Schippers; the
priggish choirboy-judge Bill McCollum -- the loving face of the Savior does
not exactly rush into one's mind. In fact, these worthies recall somewhat less
inspiring figures from the New Testament -- namely the Pharisees, those
vengeful, legalistic Jews who denounced Jesus. (The "moderates," who will
doubtless be washing their hands avidly in the days to come, conjure up that
noted Northeastern GOP fence-sitter, Pontius Pilate.) Admittedly, the mushy-
souled escape artist President Clinton makes a truly terrible Jesus, but the
imagery still isn't good.
The Republicans are zealots, but they're crafty zealots. Their attempt to take
Clinton down may blow up in their faces, but they have reasons for thinking it
won't. They think they can get away with this without being punished at the
polls, even if they don't kill Clinton. But they cherish a secret hope that
they will kill him -- that once impeachment is a fait accompli, with all the
previously mentioned flag-waving, invocation of the Founders, gravity of the
charges blah blah blah, public opinion will turn against Clinton, leading
either to his resignation or to his conviction and removal by the Senate. And
that hope is based on their belief that Clinton's support is inch-deep -- that
once the American people realize he's in trouble, they'll desert him like rats
abandoning a sinking ship.
It's the self-fulfilling prophecy strategy, and it is astonishingly
contemptuous. It presumes that the American people have no memory, no
spiritual or moral consistency, that they are incapable of holding onto any
position any longer than a jittery kid with a remote can watch one TV program.
The GOP believes this for several reasons. First, they too are children of our
Warholian society of the spectacle, in which everything that flickers across
the screen has equal weight and nothing stays on the screen for more than a
few seconds. As such, they too have been seduced by the belief that, in Marx's
words, "all that is solid melts into air." Yesterday's Clinton supporter is
today's impeachment supporter.
The scary thing is, they just might be right. There have been very few tests
of our national consistency in the channel-changing age. The public might be
influenced by the media, which has begun running this-is-a-whole-new-ballgame-
now stories. The Times, much of whose Clinton coverage continues to appall,
splashed on its cover a thin reaction story (ominous headline: "Gravity of the
issues sinking in for a public weary of scandal") that featured two or three
people in that multicultural mirror of America, Tarrytown, N.Y., saying they
were now leaning toward impeachment. (How odd, considering nothing in this
story has changed in months except the vote to impeach.) But it would be
bitterly ironic (although perfectly consistent,
