Michelle,
I think it was brave of you to put your thoughts into words and send
them to Bonnie. It sometimes helps to have others comment on their own
reactions to death and dying. Our western society is so intent on
evading thoughts about death, let alone discussions about it. Thank
you very much for sharing your experience with your elderly friend. It
may give someone else the courage to discuss it with a loved one in
similar circumstances. We were just talking about how special this
list is, how sensitive to each other's needs and how supportive we are
to each other. I think that comes from sharing the common bond of
grief and our close proximity to death and disease. It certainly
doesn't stop us from fighting with every fiber of our being to cheat it
when we can, but it's become impossible for us to hide from death, and
therefore we're more apt
to face it and try to learn how to deal with it's inevitability in a
more open manner. At least I know that is what has happened with me.
I was just telling Kerry off-list that there are times when I feel I
need a break from our loving group because each and every fur child's
struggle effects me so deeply. The benefits so out weigh the pain,
that I can't imagine leaving you. It's the same with our frail little
angels, I would never trade knowing and loving them to spare the
anguish of losing them.
Much love to you all,
Nina
[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
I think, but am not positive, that it normally takes months for
an adverse reaction to occur. But I would be afraid that any medicine
could have an adverse reaction on Fu, given his age and condition.
However, Epogen also takes a while to show any good effects, and Fu is
already doing so poorly, that a part of me thinks you should just give
it to him now. But maybe it is wise to wait until morning.
Poor guy. But Bonnie, I hope you realize, even though it does
not make this any easier to bear, that it is a miracle for Fu to live
so long. He is like my friend Al, who died two years ago today a day
short of his 98th birthday. I was with him on his last day, and I did
not want him to go. But he was ready, and unafraid. He used to want to
talk to me about death, as he felt ready and was very curious about
what it would be like, and I was so freaked out at the thought of him
dying that I could not talk about it and would tell him I did not think
it was going to happen anytime soon. I wish now that I could have just
dealt with it and talked to him about it, because he was ready and
wanted to discuss it. I am not saying this because I think you ought
to stop trying to make Fu better-- I am very aggressive in trying to
make things better, and have always hated anyone saying that I should
not try due to age or something like that (I almost punched the doctor
when I took Al to the emergency room, three months before his death,
and the doctor asked him if he wanted to be treated and, when Al said
he did, commented that many people his age do not and are just ready to
go!). I am just saying this because I think it is truly amazing that
Fu has done as well as he has, that he has fought off so many
conditions, and that you are incredible, absolutely incredible, for
getting him this far. I used to think that seeing Percy get very old
and die would be impossible to bear, having known her since I was 12. I
used to be so fearful of losing her when I would see her at my
parents'. But after adopting my positives and losing Josephine at 3
and Buddy at 1.5 years, I started looking at Percy with a sense of awe
and gratitude that she had made it so far, and that she was going to
die at the end of her life, the way things are supposed to be.
I have been wanting to say something like this to you for a few
days, but have had difficulty figuring out how to word it, because I do
not want it to be taken as castigation in any way for your attempts to
help Fu. While 19 is extremely old, I have heard of cats living into
their 20's, and I think every cat should be given that chance.
Michelle
In a message dated 1/6/2006 10:28:30 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,
[EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:
I picked up a vial of Epogen for Fu tonight. The vet
explained how to
give it to him over the phone and the pharmacist was also very nice and
spent some time showing me how to go about it.
My question is...is it possible for there to be an immediate bad
reaction? If so, I'll wait until morning when I can rush him to the vet.
The pharmacist said I could call her tonight for another half hour
(until 10pm CST) or she'll be available all weekend. I'm a little
fearful and am thinking I might wait for tomorrow morning, but my little
old fellow is so weak.
So now I'll go walk Jasmine, our Katrina orphan and check for replies
when we get back.
Bonnie
