g_b Re : Please Wish Me Good Luck!! (Very long email..plz. avoid reading if you have no time)
Rahul, It must take a lot of courage to go through something like this and still get back on track. I can only say that this is a huge inspiration to other people who may get a raw deal of fate. Guys, the email was long, but please read it. Rahul, congratulations for this new beginning. I am sure everyone here wishes you the very best, and if you are ready for it, I wish you a loving new relationship. This may sound presumptuous to you, but please keep your mind open about it - the past doesn't return and we still have the right to be happy in the future ! Cheers Salil --- walnut [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: Guys, Almost an year ago I had written the following email (the one at the bottom of this mail) to our GB group, and received lot of support from various members... My heartful of thanks to all those members who wished me Good Luck! Their prayers have been heard and today I am free with all my tensions , worries whatever u call it - Heres a new way to find what you're looking for - Yahoo! Answers
Re: g_b Re: Please Wish Me Good Luck!! (Very long email..plz. avoid reading if you have no time)
hi rahul, Being elder to you, I think I can advise or tell u something. God atleast has freed you from that bondage hell, u must thank him for that. Now you have to dumb all these hangovers start a new lease of life which he gave u. In fact I dont want to rake up your past. But if u c god had given enough indication of ur ex-wife's frivolus intentions. Anyways, the same god brought u this mess. We as such have no alternative except to tread on the path shown by him thru some alerts directly or indirectly. Hence Do pray him sincerely honestlly. Anyways, I sincerely pray to almighty to bless u with all the happiness u lacked earlier. One more thing I really like to c such mails, Hence It would be good on this forum if our members share their experiences --- walnut [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: Guys, Almost an year ago I had written the following email (the one at the bottom of this mail) to our GB group, and received lot of support from various members... My heartful of thanks to all those members who wished me Good Luck! Their prayers have been heard and today I am free with all my tensions , worries whatever u call it To begin with my story let me formally announce my name here first. I am Rahul. I have done my engineering and I have been working for last 10.5 years in the field of information technologyI have enjoyed a great career and travelled the world overWith ambitious mind and with high expectations from my happy go lucky kind of life...I purchased a new big flat for me, my parents and to start my new family life (yes even though I knew I was a gay)I got engaged to a beautiful, charming and intelligent girl...she was my distant relativeafter our engagement we started roaming around like free lovebirds...exchanged emails...kisses...and lot more that any two lovers would do. But after almost 2-3 months I started observing changes in her attitude...her behaviour and her wish list that she was trying to propose me with I was a very straight forward guy..and I had never got any chance to understand any woman so closely. At this point in time I had no thoughts of staying single as I was already attached to her and had started dreaming about my family life with her but as the time went by she started showing her true colours .she started avoiding me whenever I used to go and meet her while she was with her friends .she started giving excuses for not meeting me and started telling me that she had received lots of better marriage proposals and she could have opted for someone better than me I used to get upset and try to find flaws/loop holes in my relationship .I used to question myself if I had done anything wrong to her for which she had started showing disrespect and disregards to my feelings .Our tiffs took a shape of small disputes which in turn triggered new arguments and fights . She went to an extent of breaking our engagement and cancelling the marriage hall which we had booked for our wedding . My father was a very sensitive person and he was deeply attached to his LADLA BETA.. He couldnt see his sons engagement being broken and soon he met with his first heart attack I couldnt see my dad suffering in pain and physical torture I promised myself whatever it may cost I will try to make my relationship with her again and try to keep my dad happy So me and my Mom tried to convince her to patch up again and make a fresh start. She agreed. My dad started feeling better and he began our marriage preparations in full swing but may be god didnt want to see me happy for a long time! Just one month before my marriage on a black Saturday I lost my father He suffered cardiac arrest and left me and my Mom alone. My Mom also collapsed on seeing my dad dead and I had to hospitalized her in an ICU .I brought my Mom back home just 2 days before my wedding .my relatives and family friends advised us to go ahead with my marriage as it would only add a new member into our family and that might help my Mom feel better I had no choice but to accept the wedlock I was feeling guilty from within as at one end my Mom had turned into a widow and at other end I got married to begin my family life Was it really justified for a Son to get married especially when he had lost his father just a month before his wedding? Anyways everything said and done..I made a fresh start! But the pain of loosing my dad was still pinching me deep in my heart I always used to feel guilty whenever I slept with my wife In my dreams I used to see my Mom crying and see the dead body of my father! I had no clue whats there in store for me and I could see my future in the dark . I went into depression and our relatives advised my Mom to take me to a psychiatrist as only he could pull me out of the mental stress and trauma that I was suffering through I was under medication for 3-4 months Used to take 6
g_b Re: Please Wish Me Good Luck!! (Very long email..plz. avoid reading if you have no time)
hi sorry if i am making assumptions - dont know either walnut or his family so just posting the thoughts that came into my mind as i was reading the mail. I guess there is no way of knowing the girl's side of the story and in family conflicts its hard to say who is right and who is wrong. The girl seemd to have a reason for not wanting to marry the guy - did she realise you were gay, for instance - so actually pressurising her (my words) to do so was not the most right decision. And i can imagine the pressure on the girl to marry - especially when her would be father in law has a heart attack when she wants to break the engagement. Hve known gay friends who marry girls and end up making both their lives miserable. Let alone any consideration for the wife - have seen the guy walk off or in the worst cases stay put in the marriage and blame the wife for everythin that is wrong. cheers, shibu
Re: g_b Re: Please Wish Me Good Luck!! (Very long email..plz. avoid reading if you have no time)
Dear Walnut Rahul, Look at it positively. Fate has given you a second chance to start all over again with a new slate. It is a good thing that you have decided that you won't get married again. But please do not close yourself to life. It always throws up surprises, often couched in challenges. If you are open to life you will not only enjoy it and yu will also feel enriched. And for all that you know you may actually find the one who likes you for what you are and who wants to spend his/her life with you, in a mutually respectful station of joy and love and laughter, and some quarrels at times. With me about 5 years back, rights about the time I was convnced that I am the carefree bird that is meant to cruse through my life cruising daily for the next fuck, I had the pleasant accident of meeting Hillol, my BF, while cruising the streets of Kolkata and we have been together since, in a commited relationship, and have never missed cruising. We have had a wonderful time together, and the love and bond just grows with every passing day. We have also had our share of quarrels, but its almost become a game now, a competition about who smiles first after the tiff to make up. Every quarrel also strenghtens the relationship. I refuse to belive that such a happy accident cannot happen to you or anyone else for that matter. You just have to be open to its possibilities and when it happens, embrace it. Love and all the best Aditya B On 23 Mar 2007 20:54:09 -0700, walnut [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: Guys, Almost an year ago I had written the following email (the one at the bottom of this mail) to our GB group, and received lot of support from various members... My heartful of thanks to all those members who wished me Good Luck! Their prayers have been heard and today I am free with all my tensions , worries whatever u call it To begin with my story let me formally announce my name here first. I am Rahul. I have done my engineering and I have been working for last 10.5years in the field of information technologyI have enjoyed a great career and travelled the world overWith ambitious mind and with high expectations from my happy go lucky kind of life...I purchased a new big flat for me, my parents and to start my new family life (yes even though I knew I was a gay)I got engaged to a beautiful, charming and intelligent girl...she was my distant relativeafter our engagement we started roaming around like free lovebirds...exchanged emails...kisses...and lot more that any two lovers would do. But after almost 2-3 months I started observing changes in her attitude...her behaviour…and her wish list that she was trying to propose me with… I was a very straight forward guy..and I had never got any chance to understand any woman so closely. At this point in time I had no thoughts of staying single as I was already attached to her and had started dreaming about my family life with her…but as the time went by…she started showing her true colours….she started avoiding me whenever I used to go and meet her while she was with her friends….she started giving excuses for not meeting me and started telling me that she had received lots of better marriage proposals and she could have opted for someone better than me…I used to get upset and try to find flaws/loop holes in my relationship….I used to question myself if I had done anything wrong to her for which she had started showing disrespect and disregards to my feelings….Our tiffs took a shape of small disputes which in turn triggered new arguments and fights…. She went to an extent of breaking our engagement and cancelling the marriage hall which we had booked for our wedding…. My father was a very sensitive person and he was deeply attached to his LADLA BETA.. He couldn't see his son's engagement being broken and soon he met with his first heart attack… I couldn't see my dad suffering in pain and physical torture… I promised myself 'whatever it may cost I will try to make my relationship with her again and try to keep my dad happy' So me and my Mom tried to convince her to patch up again and make a fresh start. She agreed. My dad started feeling better and he began our marriage preparations in full swing…but may be god didn't want to see me happy for a long time! Just one month before my marriage on a black Saturday I lost my father… He suffered cardiac arrest and left me and my Mom alone. My Mom also collapsed on seeing my dad dead and I had to hospitalized her in an ICU….I brought my Mom back home just 2 days before my wedding….my relatives and family friends advised us to go ahead with my marriage as it would only add a new member into our family and that might help my Mom feel better… I had no choice but to accept the wedlock… I was feeling guilty from within as at one end my Mom had turned into a widow and at other end I got married to begin my family life…Was it really justified for a Son to get married especially when he had lost his father
g_b Re: Please Wish Me Good Luck!! (Very long email..plz. avoid reading if you have no time)
Guys, Almost an year ago I had written the following email (the one at the bottom of this mail) to our GB group, and received lot of support from various members... My heartful of thanks to all those members who wished me Good Luck! Their prayers have been heard and today I am free with all my tensions , worries whatever u call it To begin with my story let me formally announce my name here first. I am Rahul. I have done my engineering and I have been working for last 10.5 years in the field of information technologyI have enjoyed a great career and travelled the world overWith ambitious mind and with high expectations from my happy go lucky kind of life...I purchased a new big flat for me, my parents and to start my new family life (yes even though I knew I was a gay)I got engaged to a beautiful, charming and intelligent girl...she was my distant relativeafter our engagement we started roaming around like free lovebirds...exchanged emails...kisses...and lot more that any two lovers would do. But after almost 2-3 months I started observing changes in her attitude...her behaviour and her wish list that she was trying to propose me with I was a very straight forward guy..and I had never got any chance to understand any woman so closely. At this point in time I had no thoughts of staying single as I was already attached to her and had started dreaming about my family life with her but as the time went by she started showing her true colours .she started avoiding me whenever I used to go and meet her while she was with her friends .she started giving excuses for not meeting me and started telling me that she had received lots of better marriage proposals and she could have opted for someone better than me I used to get upset and try to find flaws/loop holes in my relationship .I used to question myself if I had done anything wrong to her for which she had started showing disrespect and disregards to my feelings .Our tiffs took a shape of small disputes which in turn triggered new arguments and fights . She went to an extent of breaking our engagement and cancelling the marriage hall which we had booked for our wedding . My father was a very sensitive person and he was deeply attached to his LADLA BETA.. He couldnt see his sons engagement being broken and soon he met with his first heart attack I couldnt see my dad suffering in pain and physical torture I promised myself whatever it may cost I will try to make my relationship with her again and try to keep my dad happy So me and my Mom tried to convince her to patch up again and make a fresh start. She agreed. My dad started feeling better and he began our marriage preparations in full swing but may be god didnt want to see me happy for a long time! Just one month before my marriage on a black Saturday I lost my father He suffered cardiac arrest and left me and my Mom alone. My Mom also collapsed on seeing my dad dead and I had to hospitalized her in an ICU .I brought my Mom back home just 2 days before my wedding .my relatives and family friends advised us to go ahead with my marriage as it would only add a new member into our family and that might help my Mom feel better I had no choice but to accept the wedlock I was feeling guilty from within as at one end my Mom had turned into a widow and at other end I got married to begin my family life Was it really justified for a Son to get married especially when he had lost his father just a month before his wedding? Anyways everything said and done..I made a fresh start! But the pain of loosing my dad was still pinching me deep in my heart I always used to feel guilty whenever I slept with my wife In my dreams I used to see my Mom crying and see the dead body of my father! I had no clue whats there in store for me and I could see my future in the dark . I went into depression and our relatives advised my Mom to take me to a psychiatrist as only he could pull me out of the mental stress and trauma that I was suffering through I was under medication for 3-4 months Used to take 6 pills a day and sleep for 12 hours a day it started affecting my career I could not concentrate on my work it also started affecting my health My testosterone levels went down, my haemoglobin/ RBC levels went down and my mind become slow and Iess responsive to the outside world! I realized that my psychiatrist had given me overdose of the pills which would cause imbalance of the chemical compounds in the human brain so that it became less responsive If I had continued with those pills for even a month longer then it would have definitely killed me to death one fine day, while alone I cried and screamed loudly and begged Lord Ganesha to help me come out of this situation as I knew my wife wouldnt take care of my Mom and she had only intentions to grab my money and property! I spent many nights just by watching the ceiling from
