I.T. resume

[Simon Kuldin]

Hey everyone,

 

Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
I've not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J

 

I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.

 

 

Simon Kuldin | Senior Technical Consultant | PRISM 

Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia

P: +61 3 9596 8633 M: 0408 310 957 W:  
www.prism-solutions.com.au

 

prism-v5.jpg 

People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.

 

<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Craig van Nieuwkerk]

Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
number (and age I think).

Craig.

On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin
wrote:

>  Hey everyone,
>
>
>
> Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
> I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J
>
>
>
> I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.
>
>
>
>
>
> *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*
>
> Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
>
> *P:* +61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:* www.prism-solutions.com.au
>
>
>
> [image: prism-v5.jpg]
>
> *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*
>
>
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Winston Pang]

lol, I agree with the buzzword matrix, when recruiters who use to call me
about a "Web Development" role and include WPF and WinForms and C++ in the
whole mix of it, I thought they were reading off a long list of crap.

On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:18 PM, Craig van Nieuwkerk wrote:

> Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
> 'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
> buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
> number (and age I think).
>
> Craig.
>
>
> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin <
> sim...@prism-solutions.com.au> wrote:
>
>>  Hey everyone,
>>
>>
>>
>> Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
>> I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J
>>
>>
>>
>> I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*
>>
>> Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
>>
>> *P:* +61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:* www.prism-solutions.com.au
>>
>>
>>
>> [image: prism-v5.jpg]
>>
>> *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*
>>
>>
>>
>
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Grant Molloy]

Don't forget to mention your 5yrs experience with .Net 4.0...


On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 2:44 PM, Winston Pang  wrote:

> lol, I agree with the buzzword matrix, when recruiters who use to call me
> about a "Web Development" role and include WPF and WinForms and C++ in the
> whole mix of it, I thought they were reading off a long list of crap.
>
>
> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:18 PM, Craig van Nieuwkerk wrote:
>
>> Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
>> 'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
>> buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
>> number (and age I think).
>>
>> Craig.
>>
>>
>> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin <
>> sim...@prism-solutions.com.au> wrote:
>>
>>>  Hey everyone,
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
>>> I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*
>>>
>>> Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
>>>
>>> *P:* +61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:* www.prism-solutions.com.au
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> [image: prism-v5.jpg]
>>>
>>> *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>
>>
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Noon Silk]

I used to have a lengthy CV but I dropped it down to only very brief
summaries. I don't really have a matrix of skills; more just a on-topic
quick review of what I used. Seems more correct to me, but is prone to
errors in that you may need to list things that would be trivially obvious
to programers.

It's hard to say if it "works", but you can check it out here for
comparision to others: <
http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/images/c/c0/ProgrammingCV.pdf>


On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin
wrote:

>  Hey everyone,
>
>
>
> Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
> I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J
>
>
>
> I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.
>
>
>
>
>
> *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*
>
> Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
>
> *P:* +61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:* www.prism-solutions.com.au
>
>
>
> [image: prism-v5.jpg]
>
> *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*
>
>
>



-- 
Noon Silk

http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081 >

Fancy a quantum lunch?
http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch

"Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
of being this signature."
<>

RE: I.T. resume

[Simon Kuldin]

Hehehe.. I wish ;)

 

 

Simon Kuldin | Senior Technical Consultant | PRISM 

Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia

P: +61 3 9596 8633 M: 0408 310 957 W: www.prism-solutions.com.au
<http://www.prism-solutions.com.au/> 

 

prism-v5.jpg 

People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.

 

From: ozdotnet-boun...@ozdotnet.com [mailto:ozdotnet-boun...@ozdotnet.com]
On Behalf Of Grant Molloy
Sent: Wednesday, 9 March 2011 4:04 PM
To: ozDotNet
Subject: Re: I.T. resume

 

Don't forget to mention your 5yrs experience with .Net 4.0...

 

On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 2:44 PM, Winston Pang  wrote:

lol, I agree with the buzzword matrix, when recruiters who use to call me
about a "Web Development" role and include WPF and WinForms and C++ in the
whole mix of it, I thought they were reading off a long list of crap.

 

On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:18 PM, Craig van Nieuwkerk 
wrote:

Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
number (and age I think).

 

Craig.

 

On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin 
wrote:

Hey everyone,

 

Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
I've not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J

 

I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.

 

 

Simon Kuldin | Senior Technical Consultant | PRISM 

Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia

P: +61 3 9596 8633   M: 0408 310 957 W:
www.prism-solutions.com.au <http://www.prism-solutions.com.au/> 

 

prism-v5.jpg 

People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.

 

 

 

 

<>

Re: I.T. resume

[DotNet Dude]

Age is not appropriate IMO.

On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:18 PM, Craig van Nieuwkerk wrote:

> Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
> 'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
> buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
> number (and age I think).
>
> Craig.
>
>
> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin <
> sim...@prism-solutions.com.au> wrote:
>
>>  Hey everyone,
>>
>>
>>
>> Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
>> I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J
>>
>>
>>
>> I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*
>>
>> Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
>>
>> *P:* <%2B61%203%209596%208633>+61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:*
>> www.prism-solutions.com.au
>>
>>
>>
>> [image: prism-v5.jpg]
>>
>> *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*
>>
>>
>>
>
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Grant Molloy]

What's people's opinion of showing screenshots via internet links on resume
of apps they've built for companies ?
Most places have agreements where you can't take the app offsite, and you
can't really demo an app in an interview with employer or recruiter..


On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:44 PM, DotNet Dude  wrote:

> Age is not appropriate IMO.
>
> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:18 PM, Craig van Nieuwkerk wrote:
>
>> Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
>> 'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
>> buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
>> number (and age I think).
>>
>> Craig.
>>
>>
>> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin <
>> sim...@prism-solutions.com.au> wrote:
>>
>>>  Hey everyone,
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
>>> I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*
>>>
>>> Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
>>>
>>> *P:* <%2B61%203%209596%208633>+61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:*
>>> www.prism-solutions.com.au
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> [image: prism-v5.jpg]
>>>
>>> *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>
>>
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[DotNet Dude]

I like the idea of an app portfolio as long as the links are correct and
working :-)

On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 9:59 PM, Grant Molloy  wrote:

> What's people's opinion of showing screenshots via internet links on resume
> of apps they've built for companies ?
> Most places have agreements where you can't take the app offsite, and you
> can't really demo an app in an interview with employer or recruiter..
>
>
> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:44 PM, DotNet Dude  wrote:
>
>> Age is not appropriate IMO.
>>
>> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:18 PM, Craig van Nieuwkerk wrote:
>>
>>> Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
>>> 'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
>>> buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
>>> number (and age I think).
>>>
>>> Craig.
>>>
>>>
>>> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin <
>>> sim...@prism-solutions.com.au> wrote:
>>>
  Hey everyone,



 Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
 I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J



 I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.





 *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*

 Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia

 *P:* <%2B61%203%209596%208633> <%2B61%203%209596%208633>+61 3 9596 8633
 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:* www.prism-solutions.com.au



 [image: prism-v5.jpg]

 *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*



>>>
>>>
>>
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Arjang Assadi]

I remember many ads requiring 5 years experience with .net back in 2005 !

It is good to see I am not alone dealing with those clowns!

Thanks Grant

On 9 March 2011 16:03, Grant Molloy  wrote:

> Don't forget to mention your 5yrs experience with .Net 4.0...
>
>
> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 2:44 PM, Winston Pang wrote:
>
>> lol, I agree with the buzzword matrix, when recruiters who use to call me
>> about a "Web Development" role and include WPF and WinForms and C++ in the
>> whole mix of it, I thought they were reading off a long list of crap.
>>
>>
>> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:18 PM, Craig van Nieuwkerk wrote:
>>
>>> Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
>>> 'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
>>> buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
>>> number (and age I think).
>>>
>>> Craig.
>>>
>>>
>>> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin <
>>> sim...@prism-solutions.com.au> wrote:
>>>
  Hey everyone,



 Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
 I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J



 I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.





 *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*

 Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia

 *P:* +61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:* www.prism-solutions.com.au



 [image: prism-v5.jpg]

 *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*



>>>
>>>
>>
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Noon Silk]

On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 10:01 AM, Arjang Assadi wrote:

> I remember many ads requiring 5 years experience with .net back in 2005 !
>

It had been around for about that long, I think. (I know I was using it in
2001 anyway, and that wasn't the first version IIRC).


It is good to see I am not alone dealing with those clowns!
>
> Thanks Grant
>


-- 
Noon Silk

http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081 >

Fancy a quantum lunch?
http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch

"Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
of being this signature."

Re: I.T. resume

[djones147]

I got my alpha / beta in september 2000 so if you say.   Since 2000.  
Recruiters hear 10 years experience.

There is no need to lie on a cv, recruiters will delude themselves on their own!

Davy.

"When all you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail." I feel much 
the same way about xml

-Original Message-
From: Noon Silk 
Sender: ozdotnet-boun...@ozdotnet.com
Date: Thu, 10 Mar 2011 10:03:50 
To: ozDotNet
Reply-To: ozDotNet 
Subject: Re: I.T. resume

On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 10:01 AM, Arjang Assadi wrote:

> I remember many ads requiring 5 years experience with .net back in 2005 !
>

It had been around for about that long, I think. (I know I was using it in
2001 anyway, and that wasn't the first version IIRC).


It is good to see I am not alone dealing with those clowns!
>
> Thanks Grant
>


-- 
Noon Silk

http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081 >

Fancy a quantum lunch?
http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch

"Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
of being this signature."

Re: I.T. resume

[mike smith]

On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 4:03 PM, Grant Molloy  wrote:

> Don't forget to mention your 5yrs experience with .Net 4.0...
>
>
>
I wonder if we could poison their data and claim experience with .Net 5.0?
 They'd then put that in their ads, revealing how clueless some of them are.
 Probably a bad idea for a CV submitted for a real job.

-- 
Meski

"Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. Sure, you'll
get it, but it's going to be rough" - Adam Hills

Re: I.T. resume

[Stephen Price]

Oh, that is EVIL.

I love it.

On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 8:18 AM, mike smith  wrote:

> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 4:03 PM, Grant Molloy  wrote:
>
>> Don't forget to mention your 5yrs experience with .Net 4.0...
>>
>>
>>
> I wonder if we could poison their data and claim experience with .Net 5.0?
>  They'd then put that in their ads, revealing how clueless some of them are.
>  Probably a bad idea for a CV submitted for a real job.
>
> --
> Meski
>
> "Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. Sure,
> you'll get it, but it's going to be rough" - Adam Hills
>

RE: I.T. resume

[Simon Kuldin]

No tables?  Why is that?


Simon Kuldin | Senior Technical Consultant | PRISM 
Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
P: +61 3 9596 8633 M: 0408 310 957 W: www.prism-solutions.com.au

 
People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.

-Original Message-
From: Martin Hungerford [mailto:mhungerf...@groupwise.swin.edu.au] 
Sent: Wednesday, 9 March 2011 4:48 PM
To: ozdotnet@ozdotnet.com; sim...@prism-solutions.com.au
Subject: Re: I.T. resume

Simon,
   make sure its machine readable. This means Word. and no tables. Use lots
of their keywords.

good luck.





-- 

Regards,
Martin

Martin Hungerford
Analyst Programmer
IS, ITS
x5001
0401 375 317
>>> On 9/03/2011 at 3:07 PM, in message
<01ac01cbde0f$7e7d55d0$7b780170$@com.au>,
"Simon Kuldin"  wrote:
> Hey everyone,
> 
>  
> 
> Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
> I've not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J
> 
>  
> 
> I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Simon Kuldin | Senior Technical Consultant | PRISM 
> 
> Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
> 
> P0 +61 3 9596 8633 M: 0408 310 957 W:
<http://www.prism-solutions.com.au/>
> www.prism-solutions.com.au 
> 
>  
> 
> prism-v5.jpg 
> 
> People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.
> 
>  
> 

Re: I.T. resume

[Scott Barnes]

Provided you have permission i think its fair game. You also probably need
to show not just the pretty screens but specifically what you're showing -
just like in 3D show reels, call out what you did or the techniques you did
them vs just showing 5secs of Finding Nemo and you then in small point text
"I animated the star fish in the backgrounds eyeball?" :D

Legally screenshots aren't bound by your intellectual property clauses in
contracts given they fall under the Australian Commonwealth Design Act 2003
and even then the UI has to be registerable UI in order to qualify (seek
legal advice blah blah).


---
Regards,
Scott Barnes
http://www.riagenic.com


On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 8:59 PM, Grant Molloy  wrote:

> What's people's opinion of showing screenshots via internet links on resume
> of apps they've built for companies ?
> Most places have agreements where you can't take the app offsite, and you
> can't really demo an app in an interview with employer or recruiter..
>
>
> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:44 PM, DotNet Dude  wrote:
>
>> Age is not appropriate IMO.
>>
>>  On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:18 PM, Craig van Nieuwkerk 
>> wrote:
>>
>>> Depends on the audience, but if sending to a recruiter then have a
>>> 'buzzword' matrix can't hurt. Then I have a recent jobs summary with
>>> buzzwords. Education at the end. Minimal personal info, just name and phone
>>> number (and age I think).
>>>
>>> Craig.
>>>
>>>
>>> On Wed, Mar 9, 2011 at 3:07 PM, Simon Kuldin <
>>> sim...@prism-solutions.com.au> wrote:
>>>
  Hey everyone,



 Any advice on the best way to structure a resume for the I.T. industry?
 I’ve not needed a resume for a long time so I am a bit rusty J



 I do remember having a skills matrix at the beginning is very useful.





 *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*

 Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia

 *P:* <%2B61%203%209596%208633>+61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:*
 www.prism-solutions.com.au



 [image: prism-v5.jpg]

 *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*



>>>
>>>
>>
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[mike smith]

On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 3:15 PM, Simon Kuldin
 wrote:
> No tables?  Why is that?

No idea.  But it reminds me of a sig in /. I just read.

An SQL query goes to a bar, walks up to a table and asks, "Mind if I join you?"

(but I wouldn't say 'An', because I pronounce SQL as sequel, not ess-que-ell)


-- 
Meski

"Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. Sure,
you'll get it, but it's going to be rough" - Adam Hills

Re: I.T. resume

[Stephen Price]

If the SQL query is in a bar, wouldn't it be a gay bar?

On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 1:34 PM, mike smith  wrote:

> On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 3:15 PM, Simon Kuldin
>  wrote:
> > No tables?  Why is that?
>
> No idea.  But it reminds me of a sig in /. I just read.
>
> An SQL query goes to a bar, walks up to a table and asks, "Mind if I join
> you?"
>
> (but I wouldn't say 'An', because I pronounce SQL as sequel, not
> ess-que-ell)
>
>
> --
> Meski
>
> "Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. Sure,
> you'll get it, but it's going to be rough" - Adam Hills
>

Re: I.T. resume

[Noon Silk]

On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 5:33 PM, Stephen Price  wrote:
> If the SQL query is in a bar, wouldn't it be a gay bar?

What?

-- 
Noon Silk

http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081 >

Fancy a quantum lunch?
http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch

"Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
of being this signature."

Re: I.T. resume

[David Burstin]

As in queer-y?

On 10 March 2011 17:33, Stephen Price  wrote:

> If the SQL query is in a bar, wouldn't it be a gay bar?
>
> On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 1:34 PM, mike smith  wrote:
>
>> On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 3:15 PM, Simon Kuldin
>>  wrote:
>> > No tables?  Why is that?
>>
>> No idea.  But it reminds me of a sig in /. I just read.
>>
>> An SQL query goes to a bar, walks up to a table and asks, "Mind if I join
>> you?"
>>
>> (but I wouldn't say 'An', because I pronounce SQL as sequel, not
>> ess-que-ell)
>>
>>
>> --
>> Meski
>>
>> "Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. Sure,
>> you'll get it, but it's going to be rough" - Adam Hills
>>
>
>

Re: I.T. resume

[Stephen Price]

No, as in using tables is gay...

Ask any web dev. ;)

p.s. yes, you got it. Sad I had to explain it to some people, hey Silky :p

On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 4:26 PM, David Burstin wrote:

> As in queer-y?
>
>
> On 10 March 2011 17:33, Stephen Price  wrote:
>
>> If the SQL query is in a bar, wouldn't it be a gay bar?
>>
>> On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 1:34 PM, mike smith  wrote:
>>
>>> On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 3:15 PM, Simon Kuldin
>>>  wrote:
>>> > No tables?  Why is that?
>>>
>>> No idea.  But it reminds me of a sig in /. I just read.
>>>
>>> An SQL query goes to a bar, walks up to a table and asks, "Mind if I join
>>> you?"
>>>
>>> (but I wouldn't say 'An', because I pronounce SQL as sequel, not
>>> ess-que-ell)
>>>
>>>
>>> --
>>> Meski
>>>
>>> "Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. Sure,
>>> you'll get it, but it's going to be rough" - Adam Hills
>>>
>>
>>
>

Re: I.T. resume

[Arjang Assadi]

This Implements IWalkingIntoABar interface :

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/g0juy/two_scientists_walk_into_a_bar/

any more anyone

It is Friday

Regards

On 10 March 2011 19:36, Stephen Price  wrote:
> No, as in using tables is gay...
>
> Ask any web dev. ;)
>
> p.s. yes, you got it. Sad I had to explain it to some people, hey Silky :p
>
> On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 4:26 PM, David Burstin 
> wrote:
>>
>> As in queer-y?
>>
>> On 10 March 2011 17:33, Stephen Price  wrote:
>>>
>>> If the SQL query is in a bar, wouldn't it be a gay bar?
>>>
>>> On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 1:34 PM, mike smith  wrote:

 On Thu, Mar 10, 2011 at 3:15 PM, Simon Kuldin
  wrote:
 > No tables?  Why is that?

 No idea.  But it reminds me of a sig in /. I just read.

 An SQL query goes to a bar, walks up to a table and asks, "Mind if I
 join you?"

 (but I wouldn't say 'An', because I pronounce SQL as sequel, not
 ess-que-ell)


 --
 Meski

 "Going to Starbucks for coffee is like going to prison for sex. Sure,
 you'll get it, but it's going to be rough" - Adam Hills
>>>
>>
>
>

Re: I.T. resume

[Noon Silk]

On Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 8:24 AM, Arjang Assadi  wrote:
> This Implements IWalkingIntoABar interface :
>
> http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/g0juy/two_scientists_walk_into_a_bar/
>
> any more anyone

Q: Why don't qubits go to the tailor?
A: They are scared of being measured.


> It is Friday
>
> Regards

-- 
Noon Silk

http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081 >

Fancy a quantum lunch?
http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch

"Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
of being this signature."

Re: I.T. resume

[Michael Minutillo]

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink.
"How much?" he asks.
The barman replies, "for you, no charge"


On Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 5:46 AM, Noon Silk  wrote:

> On Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 8:24 AM, Arjang Assadi 
> wrote:
> > This Implements IWalkingIntoABar interface :
> >
> >
> http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/g0juy/two_scientists_walk_into_a_bar/
> >
> > any more anyone
>
> Q: Why don't qubits go to the tailor?
> A: They are scared of being measured.
>
>
> > It is Friday
> >
> > Regards
>
> --
> Noon Silk
>
> http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081>
>
> Fancy a quantum lunch?
> http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch
>
> "Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
> of being this signature."
>

Re: I.T. resume

[Noon Silk]

On Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 4:57 PM, Michael Minutillo
 wrote:
> A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink.
> "How much?" he asks.
> The barman replies, "for you, no charge"

Warning, slightly rude joke I just invented:

Q: How does superman entertain many women at once?
A: Superposition

-- 
Noon Silk

http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081 >

Fancy a quantum lunch?
http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch

"Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
of being this signature."

Re: I.T. resume

[Michael Minutillo]

Argon walks into a bar and the barman says "we don't serve your kind here."
Argon doesn't react.

A neutrino walks into a bar. When the barman asks if it wants a drink it
says "Nah, just passing through"

A room temperature superconductor walks into a bar.
The barman refuses to serve it and it leaves without any resistance.

Schroedingers Cat walks into a bar
And doesn't

All Brian Marlowe (the science comedian) jokes ;)


On Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 2:08 PM, Noon Silk  wrote:

> On Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 4:57 PM, Michael Minutillo
>  wrote:
> > A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink.
> > "How much?" he asks.
> > The barman replies, "for you, no charge"
>
> Warning, slightly rude joke I just invented:
>
> Q: How does superman entertain many women at once?
> A: Superposition
>
> --
> Noon Silk
>
> http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081>
>
> Fancy a quantum lunch?
> http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch
>
> "Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
> of being this signature."
>

Re: I.T. resume

[Noon Silk]

On Fri, Mar 11, 2011 at 5:12 PM, Michael Minutillo
 wrote:
> Argon walks into a bar and the barman says "we don't serve your kind here."
> Argon doesn't react.
>
> A neutrino walks into a bar. When the barman asks if it wants a drink it
> says "Nah, just passing through"
>
> A room temperature superconductor walks into a bar.
> The barman refuses to serve it and it leaves without any resistance.
>
> Schroedingers Cat walks into a bar
> And doesn't
>
> All Brian Marlowe (the science comedian) jokes ;)

Yeah, I've heard them all before; I think I watched a talk of his.
This one: 

-- 
Noon Silk

http://dnoondt.wordpress.com/  (Noon Silk) | http://www.mirios.com.au:8081 >

Fancy a quantum lunch?
http://www.mirios.com.au:8081/index.php?title=Quantum_Lunch

"Every morning when I wake up, I experience an exquisite joy — the joy
of being this signature."

Re: I.T. resume

[Michael Minutillo]

> Yeah, I've heard them all before; I think I watched a talk of his.
> This one: 
>
> --
> Noon Silk

His delivery is better than my text :p

RE: I.T. resume

[Greg Keogh]

So this dyslexic walks into a bra ...

 

(name withheld)

RE: I.T. resume

[Simon Kuldin]

Reminds me of a classic Family guy sign..

 

"The Dyslexic Foundation is proud to present Chevy Chase in the film Feltch"

 

 

Simon Kuldin | Senior Technical Consultant | PRISM 

Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia

P: +61 3 9596 8633 M: 0408 310 957 W: www.prism-solutions.com.au
<http://www.prism-solutions.com.au/> 

 

prism-v5.jpg 

People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.

 

From: ozdotnet-boun...@ozdotnet.com [mailto:ozdotnet-boun...@ozdotnet.com]
On Behalf Of Greg Keogh
Sent: Friday, 11 March 2011 7:07 PM
To: 'ozDotNet'
Subject: RE: I.T. resume

 

So this dyslexic walks into a bra ...

 

(name withheld)

<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Michael Minutillo]

One of the Naked Gun films had a newspaper headline of

"Dyslexia For Cure Found"

which for some reason I always remember


On Tue, Mar 15, 2011 at 7:33 AM, Simon Kuldin  wrote:

>  Reminds me of a classic Family guy sign..
>
>
>
> “The Dyslexic Foundation is proud to present Chevy Chase in the film
> Feltch”
>
>
>
>
>
> *Simon Kuldin* | Senior Technical Consultant | *PRISM*
>
> Suite 3, 214 Bay St Brighton, VIC 3186, Australia
>
> *P:* +61 3 9596 8633 *M:* 0408 310 957 *W:* www.prism-solutions.com.au
>
>
>
> [image: prism-v5.jpg]
>
> *People.  Responsive.  Innovative.  Simple.  Methodical.*
>
>
>
> *From:* ozdotnet-boun...@ozdotnet.com [mailto:
> ozdotnet-boun...@ozdotnet.com] *On Behalf Of *Greg Keogh
> *Sent:* Friday, 11 March 2011 7:07 PM
> *To:* 'ozDotNet'
> *Subject:* RE: I.T. resume
>
>
>
> So this dyslexic walks into a bra ...
>
>
>
> (name withheld)
>
<>

Re: I.T. resume

[Arjang Assadi]

On 15 March 2011 13:56, Michael Minutillo wrote:

> One of the Naked Gun films had a newspaper headline of
>
> "Dyslexia For Cure Found"
>
> which for some reason I always remember
>

I had missed that, but now I will always remember it as well!
Thank you for mentioning it

Regards

Arjang