[RollTideFan] Deere VO - This one is worse than any of yours
Subject: Choir Practice Visitor's day at the lunatic asylum. All the inmates were standing in the courtyard singing Ave Maria and singing it beautifully. Oddly, each of them was holding a red apple in one hand and tapping it rhythmically with a pencil. A visitor listened in wonderment to the performance and then approached the choir. I am a retired choir director, he said. This is one of the best choirs I have ever heard. Yes, I'm very proud of them, said the conductor. You should take them on tour, said the visitor, what are they called? Surely that's obvious, replied the conductor. Get ready now Here goes. You sure you're prepared for this answer?... They are the: MORON TAPANAPPLE CHOIR! __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
[RollTideFan] Deere VO Sleffie
Three Black Ladies Three old black ladies were getting ready to take a plane across the ocean. The first lady said, I don't know bout y'all, but I'm gonna wear me some hot pink panties before I gets on that plane. Why you gonna wear dat? the other two asked. The first replied, Cause, if dat plane goes down and I'm out dere laying butt-up in a corn field, dey gonna find me first. The second lady says, Well, I'm a-gonna wear me some fluorescent orange panties. Why you gonna wear dat? the others asked. The second lady answered: Cause if dis here plane is goin' down and I'm floating butt-up in the ocean, dey can see me first. The third old lady says, Well, I'm not going to wear any panties... What? No panties?! the others said in disbelief. Dat's right; you heard me. I'm not wearing any panties, the third lady said, cause if dis plane goes down, dey always look for dat black box first __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
Re: [RollTideFan] Deere VO Sleffie
Thay God knows, woman ... Slef E. :) - Original Message - From: Pat Smoot [EMAIL PROTECTED] To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Sunday, February 08, 2004 8:27 PM Subject: [RollTideFan] Deere VO Sleffie Three Black Ladies Three old black ladies were getting ready to take a plane across the ocean. The first lady said, I don't know bout y'all, but I'm gonna wear me some hot pink panties before I gets on that plane. Why you gonna wear dat? the other two asked. The first replied, Cause, if dat plane goes down and I'm out dere laying butt-up in a corn field, dey gonna find me first. The second lady says, Well, I'm a-gonna wear me some fluorescent orange panties. Why you gonna wear dat? the others asked. The second lady answered: Cause if dis here plane is goin' down and I'm floating butt-up in the ocean, dey can see me first. The third old lady says, Well, I'm not going to wear any panties... What? No panties?! the others said in disbelief. Dat's right; you heard me. I'm not wearing any panties, the third lady said, cause if dis plane goes down, dey always look for dat black box first __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
Re: [RollTideFan] Deere VO Sleffie
I've tole this sorty beef or I think. Years ago on the TV show 'Password' there was a black lady who was trying to guess the password. The celebrity on the show knew the password was Deer. So he/she (I donut recall the gender) gave the contestant a clue. The celebrity looked at the word and thought... After much consideration he/she said Doe The black lady immediately said KNOB! heh... kurt __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
Re: [RollTideFan] Deere VO Sleffie
RACIST! Slef E. - Original Message - From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Sunday, February 08, 2004 9:47 PM Subject: Re: [RollTideFan] Deere VO Sleffie I've tole this sorty beef or I think. Years ago on the TV show 'Password' there was a black lady who was trying to guess the password. The celebrity on the show knew the password was Deer. So he/she (I donut recall the gender) gave the contestant a clue. The celebrity looked at the word and thought... After much consideration he/she said Doe The black lady immediately said KNOB! heh... kurt __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
[RollTideFan] Deere VO
Joe and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Joe suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Joe out. When the medical director became aware of Edna's heroic act he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as he now considered her to be mentally stable. When he went to tell Edna the news he said, Edna, I have good news and bad news The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound mindlessness. The bad news is, Joe, the patient you saved, hung himself right after you saved him with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he' s dead. Edna replied He didn't hang himself; I put him there to dry. .How soon can I go Home? __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
[RollTideFan] Deere VO
Bad Timing: A married couple is driving along a highway doing a steady forty miles per hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks over at her and speaks in a clear voice. Darling, he says, I know we've been married for twenty years, but I want a divorce. The wife says nothing, keeps looking at the road ahead, but slowly increases her speed to 55 mph. And don't try to talk me out of it, he says Because I am having an affair with your friend and she's a far better lover than you are. Again the wife stays quiet, but grips the steering wheel tightly and slowly increases the speed to 65. He pushes his luck. I want the house, he says insistently. She inches up to 75 mph. I want the car, too, he continues. She is now doing 80 mph. And, he says, I'll take the bank accounts and the credit cards and the boat. The car starts veering towards a massive concrete wall. This makes him a wee bit nervous, so he asks her, Isn't there anything you want? The wife replies in a quiet and controlled voice. No, I've got everything I need, she says. Oh really? he inquires. So what have you got? Just before they slam into the wall at 85 mph, the wife turns to him and smiles. The airbag. __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
Re: [RollTideFan] Deere VO
LOL oops I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have. - Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) - Original Message - From: Pat Smoot [EMAIL PROTECTED] To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: Tuesday, February 03, 2004 7:04 AM Subject: [RollTideFan] Deere VO Joe and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Joe suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Joe out. When the medical director became aware of Edna's heroic act he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as he now considered her to be mentally stable. When he went to tell Edna the news he said, Edna, I have good news and bad news The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound mindlessness. The bad news is, Joe, the patient you saved, hung himself right after you saved him with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he' s dead. Edna replied He didn't hang himself; I put him there to dry. .How soon can I go Home? __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
[RollTideFan] Deere VO
You have to be very careful how you explain things to kids. . . A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said,Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend? Grandma replied, Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The TV evangelists keep me company and make me feel so good, and the comedies make me laugh. I'm really happy with the TV as my boyfriend. Grandma turned on the TV, and the reception was terrible. She started adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she started hitting the back side, hoping to fix the problem. The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door, and there stood Grandma's minister. The minister said, Hello, son, is your grandma home? The little boy replied, Yeah, but she's in the bedroom bangin' her boyfriend. The minister fainted __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
[RollTideFan] Deere VO
Subject: Y-e-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a! An attractive woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Arizona when her car broke down. An American Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town. She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful, except that every few minutes the Indian would let out a Y-e-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a! so loud that it echoed from the surrounding hills. When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station, yelled one final Y-e-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a! and rode off. What did you do to get that Indian so excited? asked the service station attendant. Nothing. I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto the saddle horn so I wouldn't fall off, the woman answered. Lady, the attendant said, Indians don't use saddles __ RollTideFan - The University of Alabama Athletics Discussion List Welcome to RollTideFan! Wear a cup! To join or leave the list or to make changes to your subscription visit http://listinfo.rolltidefan.net
