pssh! i'm indecisive everyday LoL
Today you will realize that your biggest problem is indecisiveness. Or possibly procrastination. Tomorrow may be a better day to figure out which.
-------Original Message-------
Date: Monday, September 29, 2003 09:11:28 AM
Subject: [Sndbox] FW: Daily Humorscope for Monday, September 29, 2003
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Charles Mims's Personal Humorscope for Monday, September 29, 2003
"Good things come to those who wait, but not to those who wait too late." -- Bill Withers |
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Today is the day you will discover your larger cosmic destiny! A television infomercial and an 800 number are somehow involved.
You will mortally offend a friend today when a hilarious joke pops unbidden into your mind during your friend's sad description of his problems.
You will tell a total stranger that you're "sick and tired of salad", today. The stranger will recoil in shock and horror.
Today you will realize that your biggest problem is indecisiveness. Or possibly procrastination. Tomorrow may be a better day to figure out which.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
This will be a very happy week for you. And you know what they've been saying about that for thousands of years, don't you? "Happy Good! Me Like Happy!"
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
A rare form of management disease will strike you today, where you can only speak in metaphors. Still, you'll open the kimono and hit the ground running.
Libra (September 22 - October 22)
Someone will ask "How are you?" for the millionth time. You should celebrate the occasion by having a speech prepared - something embarassingly intimate is usually best. "Glad you asked, Bob. I'm having a darned tough time getting rid of these pesky genital warts, for one thing..."
Good day to try impressing someone in authority. Why not show them how good you are at making under-arm noises? That's always good for making a lasting impression.
Today you will uncover a conspiracy, involving leaf-blowers and other noisy and completely pointless garden equipment.
Soon you will get into accounting, "just for the thrill of it."
Your morning grumpiness and sluggishness will vanish soon, when you discover that the problem was just using the wrong type of deodorant soap. Soon you'll be stepping out of the shower, grinning like an imbecile!
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
People will tease you about wearing your golf shoes indoors. Don't you mind them, though -- they're undoubtedly just jealous. |
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