Hate to bother again, but I've been down this road several times and
even created a less than adequate solution but am determined to make
this area more usable:

Problem: I'd like to easily be able to specify to a query
"disable_other_eagerloads", in a manner similar to
enable_eagerloads(False), except it only affects relationships not
specifically joined/subquery loaded for that query.

I've taken to heart comments you've made more than once about avoiding
marking lazy=False in the relationship mappings.  In fact, I've seen
they have a very evil side, I've tried to portrait them as potentially
evil to the engineers I work with who would more happily take the lazy
approach of eagerloading everything in the mappers so they don't have
to think about it. I've also removed the majority of them.

Still, there are relationships that, far more often than not will need
to be joinloaded, so some are still marked as lazy=False.  I suspect I
may rip my hair out someday and remove every last one of them, but in
the meantime, a query option that shuts off all those you haven't
specifically mentioned in the query would be very useful.

I'm getting lost within strategies.py and hope you would just shove me
in a sensible direction for how you might go about creating such a
feature....

Thanks

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